What do you think of girls that use their looks to get ahead?

Question

What do you think of girls that use their looks to get ahead?

I'm asking this question because an acquaintance of mine that I interned with at the radio stations a few years ago now has a job with them as an account manager.

She knows I do good work with my company, so she contacted me and I asked her how she a got that job (because I knew she didn't have the experience for it) and she told me the truth (which I was shocked that she told me the truth), she was dating the programmer. Then she proceeded to tell me why she dated him, and it was to get the job. (I think she is a bubble brain for telling me, or maybe not because I am not really telling anyone who cares)

I have nothing against her personally. I just don't know what to think? A part of me says, "hey, more power to her." The other part of me says, "hey, is that even fair? What if someone else wanted that job that really deserved it, and worked hard for it?"

What do you guys think?

hereandthere · Accepted Answer

its part of the system in which we live. women are often judged and valued more based on looks. a sense of worth is tied to looks for women. this is true for everyone, but the history behind women not having much opportunity in general or being instilled with values of merit instead of values of beauty plays into this.

im sure many people, male and female, benefit from their looks whether they realize it or not. so there's that.

i tihnk because the societal male psyche has not developed the same way (men have been taught that they can DO and not simply look and be decorated) that men may be less inclined to actively try to get ahead on their looks. but to my second point above, it doesn't mean many many of them don't benefit from looks without trying. statistically, tall people are more likely to be CEOs, to be respected, thought to be more competent, etc. race (and how you look is like a huge part of race lol) even comes into play in discrimination or prejudices about intelligence, competence, performance in certain fields, attitude. being attractive as well is the icing on the cake, especially if the job you're looking for requires face to face contact with customers or clients, publicity, etc. - you may strategically want at least some good looking people working for you.

so I guess for me it comes down to whether or not there's a difference between the results of trying to use your looks and the results of being favored because of your looks, whether you want it that way or not. and essentially there isn't much of a difference, imo. you operate within a context that judges people, especially women, based on their looks and physical appearance. whether or not you try to use that system is irrelevant if we (society in general, when it comes to work or achievement) judged purely on merit. I even read something that said employers think a woman with a bit of makeup on looks more polished, competent, and will take her more seriously than a woman who goes bare faced. the problem for me isn't really individuals using the system in place, the method of judging people and connotations already in action, to their advantage. its the system itself, the way people judge and those connotations, that is the problem.

i do think its demeaning to yourself to think you couldn't actually get by on your own merit, but that isn't always the case. you could just want to get by the easiest way. its not helpful to your career or your performance in case anyone comes along to evaluate you who doesn't give a sh*t about your looks, but that's a personal call you have to make and not really my concern. you can choose to stunt your growth in your field and sell yourself short if you want.

its definitely unfair, but so are a lot of things in this world that are far more serious.

MoeMoe · Accepted Answer

I don't think highly of women who blatantly use their looks or charm to get ahead. I think this goes for a lot of men in the work place. Yeah they are nice to look at but when it comes down to it men know that those "hotties" use their looks to get their jobs and quiet frankly they should be the first ones to be FIRED cause most of them don't THINK, they lack talent and have that sh*t attitude of ugh I'm "Hot" so since I'm "Hot" I should just be given this certain position and just move up in the company cause ugh I'm "Hot". Hotness should be a determent unless you specifically know your s*it like everyone else. If you don't know your s*it for the job, aren't qualified and are still "hot" then that "hotness"/looks shouldn't matter cause you aren't qualified, if your not qualified, then no matter how "hot" you are your a determent if companies just hire you for your looks. Especially in this economy guaranteed "hotness" "looks" doesn't work these days, cause companies know there are many many much better talent and if they don't bring their s*it, know what the h*ll they are doing your either laid off or fired in this economy.

If ladies just come into a job just solely based on their "Looks" then they should expect the lowest salary or hourly and if they just sit, they should be given the menial tasks, if they run out of work they shouldn't be guaranteed full time hours. I wouldn't hire a chick to just be "hot", they MUST meet the same qualifications as any other candidate.

confuuuuuuuuused · Accepted Answer

I voted indifferent because there was no option for what I really think. It is a known fact that some people's looks help them a lot even if they don't actually use them that way but these people also have the skills and experience. They are capable of doing the job, so I have no problem with that and those are the majority of good looking people getting promoted and the good jobs.

For those who don't have the qualifications and just use there looks, I don't have much respect for them but I have even less respect for the people who hire/promote them based on that alone. It affects everyone in the company too, these people usually aren't good at the job and it has a negative impact on the people who work with and for them.

CatholicVirginia · Accepted Answer

The way I see it, more power to her. Anyone is welcome to use whatever tactics they want to get ahead. A woman who uses her beauty to get ahead has to then be talented enough to STAY ahead. If she has the talent to stay ahead, she deserves it. If she fails, she'll fall back and be overtaken. Success is about manipulating the circumstances you are given to do your best. Her looks are a circumstance.

This is all because I don't really believe that promotions and power comes to complete idiots. No matter how beautiful you are, no one's going to promote a complete idiot. She at least has to be manipulative to live off of her beauty.

mia456 · Accepted Answer

its not right to use your looks 2 get ahead but sooner or later they will be the not so hot old lady that has a bad husband some are lucky and have a good guy years later. But its not anyone's decision but theirs so what can you do about that nothing nothing at all.

AllDay · Answer

I'm indifferent.

I feel the same way as you.

Like it is messed up that she kinda used him to get that job but at the same time. Do what you gotta do.

This economy is rough on everyone and people don't have jobs so everyone is pushed to against a wall.

I've learned it's not what you know. It's who you know.

Sometimes have a 4.0 GPA doesn't mean much if you don't know people.

It's more important in some fields then in others e.g. business and politics.

But what about girls who dress up a little extra sexy for an interview?

Does she deserve the job vs. a guy? or vs. a girl who dresses more conservatively?

TheGodEmperorLeto · Answer

It's the way the world is, but it's pathetic imo. Pathetically weak. Weak they offer nothing else substantial enough to get ahead and weak as hell on the person being stupid enough to let them get ahead due to their looks (aka the boss, teacher, whatever).

It is just disappointingly pathetic in all ways.

And that woman is a BITCH. What if the programmer really loved her? And was really interested in her? And then she just uses him? True, it's likely he was just interested in sex, but either way it's still f***ing disgusting. I hate people using others for their own selfish gains. It's why our world is so f***ed up in the first place.

Dantemustdie · Answer

well she's be at fault in the end, there will probably come a time in the job where she'll need to rely on her 'skills' to excel at the job, and she doesn't have those skills so that will be a challenge for her. Truth be told, she'll probably just cruise her way through the job and be happy doing that, one thing I learned from the last while is that life, sometimes, really isn't fair. It's just something we have to accept, and no amount of me brooding over it can stop that, so I just let things be and say f*** it, but I do keep a memory in my head of what happens, I never forget.

MrWrong · Answer

I don't think highly of women who blatantly use their looks or charm to get ahead. I also don't think highly of anyone who would let their own ulterior motives or another's charm lead them to give this person a boost in a company like that.

I wouldn't say I consider it unfair. Life is unfair in general. I just think less of a person who uses looks or charm instead of personal merit to get a position.

ben890 · Answer

I think in the situation you described, it could have easily been a guy who dates someone to get ahead?

I voted C but only because I don't agree with A and B, haha. When guys whine about it being unfair, it's usually misguided... I don't think the power that attractive women have is actually power. Yes, if you're a hot girl, you can get things handed to you, but WHY? Where is the double standard coming from? It's just a reflection of how our culture places so much emphasis on women's looks instead of their other qualities, which is not exactly a good thing for women in the big picture.

bellybuttonlint · Answer

I'm at odds with it. On one hand it unfairly gives someone undeserving a job, but at the same time people who use their looks to get ahead will pay dearly in the long run...so it evens out.

If you do good, then good will follow. But it might not follow you at the same pace though. I wouldn't worry about ti...there are tons of average looking women in my building who have good jobs and salaries.

sikoo31 · Answer

i don't really give a f*** cause it depends on what situation they used their looks in.

a model NEEDS to use her looks to do well in her career.

but a student doesn't, but might try looking prettier for the teacher just to get a better grade.

if she doesn't need to use them, then its a bit shady of her to use her beauty, but if she does, then who could be mad at her for doing her job well?

but for your situation, yeah that's very unfair, she shouldn't have that job. also, she used another person, manipulated him. and that's just not right.

but then again, his fault for being stupid enough to be manipulated.

iNeedYourAdvice · Answer

I don't think it's right, because someone else could have filled that role better and maybe helped the company more. It is also sad that she essential sells her relationship status to anyone that will give her what she wants.

ElijahCynicism · Answer

The art of seducing, man. Some cultures considered seduction a powerful skill, as worthy as any other. In fact, I'd even say it's probably a worthier skill than any you can get a PhD in, so she's one up on anyone else who wants to get the job already. Go ahead.

tohrment · Answer

I'm indifferent. It is what it is. I'd hope she isn't a complete doodleberry and must be decent at her job to keep it.

Realistically, if you have two people who have similar qualifications and experience, and one is better looking - that one will get the job. Good looks are a perk, especially in those kinds of industries. I guess it's just utilising the assets you have at your disposal.

Seems a bit "ugh" to do it deliberately though.

windy-rose · Answer

In that example, I'm not a fan. I think you should have qualifications to back whatever you do. Though knowing people is very important, I wouldn't date someone just to get a job.

I don't mind layering on a little "pretty girl charm" to add to the package, but there's got to be obvious substance.

FaceInTheCrowd · Answer

Does it seem ironic that one of the nastiest feminists, Gloria Steinem, was a former Playboy bunny. Ask yourself what these two things have in common ...

frankota · Answer

More power to her. It doesn't matter. If she's a bad person, the guy will dump her. If she's nice, and seriously interested, then doesn't she deserve to have a boyfriend?

daytrader · Answer

I am indifferent because that's just the way society has always worked.

I think men use looks too. It would be more of an advantage for men if there were more woman CEOs or in positions in power. The job I got I was hired by a woman who was vice president of a company, and I could tell she was attracted to me, which probably helped me to get hired.

TheCritic89 · Answer

I'm indifferent about it.

When it comes down to getting hired and advancing. I see it as coming down to what you can bring to the table. It is unfair, to a certain extent. However, leadership skills, confidence, and the ability to get results will take a company farther than looks will. If a next-level up supervisor or manager doesn't notice this. I make sure his supervisor or manager does.

stercor · Answer

Not terribly unfair, just unfair.

But she's using something that won't last to get what she wants.

"After 40, you're responsible for the lines in your face."

Life can be cruel when you have to work for what you get, and can't rely on artificiality.

"You are? I'm shallow too!"

DutchAtheist · Answer

I feel like everything we are is an asset. The way you look or the personality you have is just as important to land a job or move up in the company as your qualifications or the way you do your job. If you succeed by using your looks that's good for you. Really, I don't care. On the other hand, it does reflect on your personality and that way it could eventually work against you, if your boss or colleagues take offense to it. Also, in this case, is it worth it to 'sell' your body for a job?

heavensgift2girls · Answer

If a woman wants to turn herself into a sex object to get ahead that's fine, but later I better not hear her whine about not getting any respect just because she is a woman, and how she keeps getting treated like a sex object. You reap what you sow. If a woman wants my respect as an equal, she needs to earn it just like any man would.

TedStar · Answer

If you got it. Flaunt it. I personally have nothing against people who use their looks to get ahead. Life is what you make of it and some people have been dealt terrible hands and others have been dealt great hands. Is it fair? Probably not, but we all know that not everything in life is fair.

LoveLayne · Answer

LOL if she can work it like that.. then DAMN more power to her... but if she's not really at 10/10 then... it's not even right ahhaha

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