Girls, would you have a problem with your (future) fiance / husband, hiring a "hot" female personal assitant?

Question

NOTE: guys can vote on what they think the average girl will vote on this poll

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Let's say that your (future) fiance or husband is going to hire a personal assistant to work directly under him at his workplace, and he is in control of the whole hiring process.

After interviewing many male and female candidates, he hired who he felt was the best candidate for the job (on paper as well as personality chemistry since they will be closely working together).

You meet his new assistant, and you know for sure that your husband finds this woman (to his standards) physically/sexually attractive.

You look at her wedding band finger and don't see a wedding ring or band.

She's very warm, friendly, bubbly, and dresses in a professional manner (makeup and clothing) that flatters her body and natural look...

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...but isn't explicitly flirting with your (future) fiance / husband when you're around, and he has never mentioned her doing such behavior.

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With this situation, knowing that he will spend more waking hours at work, working closely and one-on-one, with this sexy attractive woman, who he is her boss (position of power)...

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...than he does with you (this is usually the case with career men in marriages)...

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...what is your comfort level with this situation?

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Please vote and reply as detailed as you wish, explaining why you voted the way you did.

Do you know anyone who has been involved in situation like this (as the assistant, husband, or wife)?

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Thank you for answering, and feel free to guess the Pokemon! :-D

eaeaea · Accepted Answer

HAhahah! F***off! Are you serious!

If he has to choose someone and he loves me, even if she meets all those amazing qualities that meet the job's expectations, he will over look her. Simply because he knows that even if he is not a cheater, the possibility will ALWAYS exist. It's a man a woman, alone...

Would any guy be comfortable knowing a very hot attractive tall guy with a super charismatic personality, is working very closely with their wife to be? I doubt it... Especially if she CHOSE him.

IT's not so much about insecurities, but we are all human and everyone is weak, most especially men when talking about arousal. Most are easily excited and if given the chance/opportunity perfect time and place, they will take it. Regardless of how much they love their wife. Perhaps there is a 1% that won't but most agree with me even if they don't admit it. Because even if he doesn't cheat realistically, he surly will mentally, and that's how it all starts.

If you truly love someone, you would never put yourself in that position. :]!

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

i would feel extremely threatened and it wouldn't be pretty. especially because this man I know I went on some dates with teased me that he is going to take me on as his intern and I know he would like to sleep with me and since I'm fairly younger I would def look like his eye candy. he even said if he said I was his assistant or intern or whatever it would make him "look good" because he thinks I'm hot and people will think we are screwing...so I wouldn't be too thrilled.

on the other hand I wouldn't want the guy to hate me or think I am controlling. I hope I am not in this position.

desidoll · Accepted Answer

I choose A.Why? It because if someone wants to cheat,they will cheat,weather the third person is hot or not.Plus I am a very confident person and no matter how hot she is I would think he isn't with her,he is with me.In case it happened,what I can say here is I am glad I can see his true color now,rather than later.

ObscuredBeyond · Accepted Answer

Looks aren't everything, ladies. And not every guy has the same standards. What you may think is a "hot" girl competing for my attention may not necessarily be the type that triggers an immediate response.

A woman who can handle an argument, discuss a disagreement on something, and not internalize it too much, remain objective in her thoughts, and can keep her cool for so long as it's reasonable to do so, stands a much better chance of gaining my long-term respect than a bombshell babe who looks for every possible way to twist what I say into an excuse to be offended.

So even if she's hotter than you on the outside; if she's a bitch, I'll stick with you and avoid her. And if she's too high-conflict, I might not hire her in the first place. I can allow some difference of opinion; but a high-conflict personality would be like setting off a bomb in the workplace.

DutchAtheist · Accepted Answer

Women would have a problem with that and I would too if the shoe was on the other foot. A personal assistant is very close with their boss. Even if both parties try to be professional, the pa is there when you had a fight at home, when you feel down and need some comfort, when you go on business trips... They know how hard you work and how unfair your partner must have been... I work in a professional environment and the rumours around these kind of thing, even if untrue, are enough to be uncomfortable with it.

PoeticNinja · Answer

What are his reasons for hiring her? I would want to look at her application, just in case he's not hiring her just due to her looks...

To have a late night office f***? Is that it?

Yeah, see... I don't want those type of questions/thoughts in my head, where it'll drive me crazy. Which will push him away.

Similar situation - My ex, he takes biology class WITH labs and every time, his partner is a girl. Which is fine then, I see how attractive she is and/or how close they are when going over materials together. You know, there tend to be mistakes made where they can laugh together... *Pouts - It's fine but that's bonding.

Some girls are very sneaky... Guys may not see it but us girls do and she can come onto him anytime. I don't want to be paranoid by it...

If the hot assistant was to reel in customers... I guess, that's okay.. For business purposes.. But only for the first 4 promotional months. Then, he better hire someone else... Maybe, a man this time.

KryHeart · Answer

I think every girl - regardless of the facade she kept up or how well she denied it - would absolutely hate that.

Girls are the most competitive creatures on the planet. I would definitely tell my husband how that'd make me feel.

However, I would have to trust him. I would even go so far as getting to know the girl. Not in a hostile way, but just to make myself more comfortable, with nothing done behind his back. I would insist that everything be open and I would inquire about the girl and any extra hours he worked until I was comfortable with the situation.

pr3ttybr0wn · Answer

I would have a serious problem with it. He better fire that chick by the next business day, or I'm hiring a 6'3 muscular brazilian guy to help me run errands.

I would prefer him hire a man, or a very ugly woman (think Precious) or a masculine butch lesbian. Those are his 3 options if he does not want me to get upset and hire that hot brazilian assistant.

Anonymous · Answer

i would find it difficult,

I wouldn't be the fear that he might sleep with her, but I would have trouble believing that the most qualified person for the job just happens to be the knockout blond bombshell,...i'm sure that's how every guy justifies it "but they were the most qualified" but it's just such a cliche, and would make me respect him less as a person...for being one of THOSE guys, who needs a fast car or a hot girl around him to boost his ego.

those guys are always weak willed and pathetic.

jpinka · Answer

i have enough confidence to not care. and if by chance he did bang her, id know I'm the best thing in his life and if I have to, I can do better and deserve a guy who cheats. on the other hand, he know he can have a 3 some with us if he wanted so its all good lol 3some is not cheating by the way

fefe884 · Answer

I would definitely be uncomfortable with it. Not only would she be very attractive, but she'd be working with my hubby alone--together--late at night--more hours spent with her than with me. Definite, humongous discomfort. But then again, it would probably be based on how my husband is like and how much I trust him, so it the conditions are right, then I may not have any problem with it.

AnnieVincereVelMori · Answer

I think if he has never given me any reason to not trust him, I wouldn't say anything to him about it. I would let my jealousy brew inside :P

But if he had given me a reason prior, I'd be on that situation like white on rice. Hell no, she gotta go.

That last part didn't feel natural to type...

gemglam · Answer

So the pokemon is Milotic. No I would not have a problem with it. If I can't trust my man what's the point of being with him. Plus if a guy is going to cheat there is nothing I would be able to do to prevent him from doing that nor can I control that. The only thing I would be able to control is how sexy I look when I walk out of his life if he did do it. Having a problem with the attractive female just shows how insecure you are and if that's the case the relationship is doomed anyways.

RedSmartie · Answer

No way no way no way would I ever ever ever be okay with that.  If he hired a woman he finds attractive who he has "personality chemistry" with and will be working alongside for several hours a day, you bet your ass he's going to be thinking about it and might eventually act on it.  I don't care how great a guy is, no man can be trusted around a beautiful woman with a great personality for that long every day.

caligirl3 · Answer

its a tricky one, but if he hasn't given me any reason to doubt him in the past I would be pretty cool about it although I would keep my eyes open just in case. FTR I'm saying I will be cool about it cause to be honest if I was hiring a secretary and a hot guy applied I think I would hire him, I wouldn't even care if he was the best for the job, sometimes you just want a little eye candy.

cazza3 · Answer

If I'm planning on marrying the guy then I must trust him. If I didn't trust him I wouldn't be with him. Plus its rather presumptuous and demeaning to assume that a hot intelligent woman is going to sleep with every guy she works with/for. If she's the best qualified then him not hiring her because she's hot would worry me more because it would mean he doesn't trust himself around hot, sexy women or that he thinks I don't trust him

prophecy · Answer

i have a very hot assistant. like really hot. and there were problems because of this in the past.

the fact is, no one likes to see their partner with a good looking person of the opposite gender working together, hanging out together, or even talking to much. doesn't matter what they say or how they act.

even chicks who are considered a perfect 10 and actually very confident had certain "problems" with her.

MissAlexandra · Answer

It all comes down to trust and security. I'd be perfectly fine with it because I trust my significant other and I'm secure enough with myself to not be threatened by the new assistant.

Unfortunately, many girls will feel threatened by this new assistant; this is because of the lack of trust and/or security in herself and/or her relationship.

Betwyn · Answer

I'd be fine with it.. just write him cheating into the substantial pre-nup and wait to get single and rich...

Brando · Answer

Honestly if he has his own business, hiring some hot eye candy to work in the office could be good for business. People like pretty things and having attractive employees isn't just about the male co-workers having something to gawk at.

TheGodEmperorLeto · Answer

It amuses me that there are women who have a problem with this and at the SAME time will criticize a guy for having a problem with her having guy friends she hangs out with :|

sweet_18 · Answer

Honestly, I would be very uncomfortable with that. And I'd try to find way to occupy my time so I don't think about it too much. Brooding over a situation you have no control over never did anyone any good

randommixedchick · Answer

No. If he's really into my fine ass then it shouldn't even be a problem.

chriistellkelly · Answer

Id be very uncomfortable. Id feel like he would think she's better looking than me. I also get jealous very easily.

Luv2run · Answer

Why does she have to be hot?  I'd be very uncomfortable

Girls, would you have a problem with your (future) fiance / husband, hiring a "hot" female personal assitant?

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