My boyfriend is a pretty handsome guy, hence the weight but he has gotten too big and it's even affecting our sex life. He used to weigh just 210-220lbs and he's about 5"10, now he has gone up to 280 within the past 4 years that we've dated. He eats fast food all the time and the doctor has said that he's at risk for heart disease and he's only 23! I've tried on many occasions to get him with me to the gym but he says that he doesn't like it. I'm fit myself and his lifestyle doesn't fit in with mine. He doesn't want to do anything about it and he gets out of breath from just walking up a flight of stairs. During sex, I do the cowgirl position or on top because I know how uncomfortable it is for him to be on top or sideways, which I don't have a problem with but he's had panting fits and breaths extremely hard and even stops to catch his breath which usually turns me off.
The other day, my girlfriends and I went out and they all started talking about their men and my close friend brought up my BF's weight and how he is obese etc . and that I need to tell him. I told her to f*ck off and we didn't speak for a week. Than, she later apologized and I realized that I've been complaining about our relationship because of the extra weight.
I've tried to trick him into going on a diet the other day and that didn't work. He lashed out and slapped me and told me to find another guy who was thinner. I felt bad and I didn't want to say anymore. I don't want to give up on him so easily and I know his family has been consoling me about how they are worried about his health and I just don't know what to do. To be honest, I'm quite repulsed by him lately and I can't fix myself to look at him and really say that I'm attracted to him because I'm not. Is there a nice way to say all of this without hurting him?
The other day, my girlfriends and I went out and they all started talking about their men and my close friend brought up my BF's weight and how he is obese etc . and that I need to tell him. I told her to f*ck off and we didn't speak for a week. Than, she later apologized and I realized that I've been complaining about our relationship because of the extra weight.
I've tried to trick him into going on a diet the other day and that didn't work. He lashed out and slapped me and told me to find another guy who was thinner. I felt bad and I didn't want to say anymore. I don't want to give up on him so easily and I know his family has been consoling me about how they are worried about his health and I just don't know what to do. To be honest, I'm quite repulsed by him lately and I can't fix myself to look at him and really say that I'm attracted to him because I'm not. Is there a nice way to say all of this without hurting him?
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Edit: He's highly insecure and has threatened me to stop going to a gym with men as there are gyms exclusively for women. I have s contract with this specific gym and unlimited visitors passes for him to attend with me but he isn't interested. He assumes that I want to be with a thinner man but I never cared when he was about 215 which he was still thick, but he looked very good regardless. Now he's 20-25 lbs short of 300.
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