What is your opinion on Autism?

Question

How do you perceive Autism?
Any experience with it?
Would you date/have a relationship/marry someone with autism if they were attractive, smart, attentive, loving?

Is it a disability, curse, impairment, a prison of the mind?

Or is it source of strength, passion, obsession? 

I don't mind if it's a bad experience, bad perception, all i need is your complete honesty. I won't judge.

Kalinda · Accepted Answer

Rcently diagnosed with aspergers or high functioning autism.

Doesn't really change anything. I've always Been very one track mind - focus. I don't like being interrupted I get things done. So that'd me it makes sense and I see it as a good thing.

I like people but I need a lot of alone time to equilibreate. Again I saw that as making sense and tbh I'd be really uncomfortable if i needed constant attention just to feel " ok ". So it's another thing I appreciate.

I've always been literal which again makes sense to me. I dont play games or jerk people around,. I don't have a problem with sarcasm and I use it quite a bit. Thoigh I'm probably way more sarcastic than I can understand it from others and forget it online. Lol I usually have to ask people if they are joking if I can't see them. But a big part of that I think, is bc I'm very direct and blunt and I'll often say things most people wouldn't ( not mean or stupid but just things people skirt around- so when someone says something relatively outrageous I wouldn't be sure if it's not genuine bc it's something if have no problem saying. I'm probably not someone you want to ask if you look fat if what you're hoping for is no of course not. I'd sooner help you construct a healthy weigh loss program. Thigh I'd be kind about it. Likewise asking me anything where you just want a positive answer regardless if facts- not your person. But on the flip side in very honest trustworthy and reliable bc I have no intrest in jerking people around. Does nothing fir be I get more if a thrill out if having direct interactions. Not to mention I " care" about not ring a dick.

I have rather strict expectations of myself and my behavior. I don't know of this is from the autism or if it adapted from years if having to control myself and direct myself in a way that helped me navigate through situations in light of it. Either way I am considerably concerned with doing what's right. Which makes sense to me is good. Also makes it ( difficult)

xHoneyxBeex · Accepted Answer

My opinion (based on the options you gave) is that it's simply a disability. I would never call it a curse. Autistic people are still human beings and they have a lot to offer the world.

Now, would I date an autistic person? It would honestly depend on how severe their autism is on the autism spectrum. Are they independent at all or need help with basic things? Autism varies a lot.

I graduated from high school with an autistic boy and he was one of the sweetest people I have ever met. His autism is kind of severe though. He couldn't really communicate with others, he had to use a device to sort of speak for him in a way that other people could understand. He is extremely intelligent though, he especially loves math. I'm actually friends with his mother on Facebook and every now and then she'll post about his autism and the daily struggles they go through. It's kind of heartbreaking at times to read her posts but beautiful and powerful at other times.

I think it takes a very special person to care for someone who is autistic (if they can't care for themselves). I'm sure it takes a lot of patience, love, and compassion. I probably could not do it but I have a ton of respect for those who do.

kaylaS91 · Accepted Answer

I work as a behavioral interventionist with kids with ASD. One 20 year old male has Asperger's syndrome, and I've been working with him for 2 years already.

Would I have a relationship with someone with autism? Perhaps if they were really high functioning. However, I don't think that would be something very practical, regardless if they're extremely handsome/smart. I love to get a lot of affection and support from whoever I'm with. I know that's not something that would come naturally to most with ASD, and I would not feel right getting it as more of a learned behaviour.

I'd call it for the most part an impairment. I have yet to work with anyone with a severe ASD though so keep that in mind.

No bad experiences over here! I've found that if you learn the few things that always will trigger the individual to have a fit and avoid them, as well as behave more in a manner that seems to leave them at ease, it'll be fine. Didn't go anything as I'd imagine or was warned to expect from friends, that those with ASD will be dangerous, totally off their rockers, etc.. :)

TastikD · Accepted Answer

i have two cousins who are autistic and at first it was very hard to communicate and understand them for it was as if we were not even there for them. Then the more you interact with them the more you realize that despite their autism there is nothing really wrong. I was amazed each day by them, they understand you, they listen to you, they do see you and they are intelligent, like very intelligent. So is autism for me a disability, maybe for it is hard for them to be understood at first but i do not know if it is one (a disability) in only our eyes? a curse? nope i don't think so. An impairment maybe a strong word but considering their difficulties at first it could be, not a prison of the mind more like a freedom we find hard to comprehend.

wil i date a person with autism like the one you described? i do not see the problem!
will i date another person with autism? honestly it will all depend on how we will connect together for each autism is unique and sometimes plain hard, it will be there or it will not but it is not something that will make me scrunch my nose at.

Helleri · Accepted Answer

My Roommate/Friend/Landlord is Autistic.
He is a smart guy and a good friend.
Owns his house and car outright. Has a fiance. Is enrolled in a vocational school for welding and fabrication. Has a dog, two cats and a bird. That said...

He is emotionally puerile. Legos, Nerf Guns, Cartoons, Farts, flicking people with water after he washes his hands... these things are all just as awesome to him now as they would have been when he was 7. He doesn't have a filter either. If he thinks it. he says it. I've walked into the kitchen or living room before to see him... far away. There but not there.

I honestly believe that without a massive support system of friends and family, that he would be in a really bad place right now because the world would break him.

It's a truly strange thing to know someone who is very independent... and at the exact same time so very dependent.

He doesn't clean. And, that extends to not picking up his dice, legos or nerf darts. Do you know how strange it is to have to tell a 32 year old man to pick up his toys and rinse his plate? If you don't tell him each and every time, he won't do it.

... Even though he is a good friend. I can only tolerate him in small doses (which kind of sucks because I rent a room from him, lol). I have not lived here long and I am already looking at other options. This is all to say I am not unfamiliar with such a situation. And really, I don't think I could do the same full time with a significant other.

stevephillips706 · Accepted Answer

I have autism and i would gladly answer this question. i dont hate or love autism. it annoys the hell out of me at times but its also a constant companion and i can't imagine life without it. it doesn't come without its struggles. But i have managed to make friends and have a girlfriend and have sex so i have accomplished a lot. people always look at all the people with autism that haven't had girlfriends or sex or can hold down jobs. but there are a lot with it that have had sex and girlfriends and there are some that are married. and some that can hold down jobs. Remember autism may be a gentic gene but there is no gene against the human spirit meaning an autistic person can accomplish anything they put their mind to

Drooogie4 · Answer

Firstly, I work at a pediatric therapy clinic. We see a lot of autistic kids.
Personally, I think it's way over diagnosed. A lot of parents get the diagnosis so insurance will help them.
A lot of the "autistic" kids end up being a lot more normal once their systems are woken up. A lot are kids that are severlt apraxic , they can't motor plan.. and that can have a lot of similar traits.
But I'm not sure I believe in the "spectrum". We do see a lot of true autistic kids. And yes, they can be very enjoyable once they learn to connect to the world. But its rough. They never will have tjr full socuske tact. Because its all learned, not innate. Their inner workings tend to just be a little different that way.
So could I date someone autistic? No. Not under my definition. Since I don't really see the spectrum.. To me, autistic isn't just aspergers. That I could handle.
This being said, I'm not a therapist. But, I have worked really in the middle of it all for years. Its really fascinating stuff.
And I have a super knowledgeable boss. As well as the therapists.

lunargirl13 · Answer

I have a brother who is autistic. Actually two now, but I grew up with one. It's defiantly hard to deal with them depending on how severe it is. During childhood is the worst because my mom could not understand my brother to save her life. I am the oldest and I am an Irish twin to my autistic brother so for some reason I always knew what he wanted without him saying anything. My mom would have gone inane without me.
Because of my brother I have a lot of patients for him. But not for anyone else apparently. I don't think I would be able to date someone with autism. Because it's easy to misunderstand them and I know I wouldn't have a connection with a partner like I still have with my brother.
I would never call it a curse. My brother is extremely smart. He's actually pretty mild and is aware that he is autistic but doesn't want to be. Because he was the mildest in his special ed class, he associates autism with stupidity, which pisses me off every time he mentions it. It can defiantly be a disability, but my brother has made the best of it so far.

ccp16 · Answer

I don't hold anything against autistic people in anyway. That being said, I did have a very negative experience once. In college, my flatmate moved out due to some problems home and I was struggling to find someone to help with rent, the school ended up putting a kid with me that had autism. This really wasn't his fault though, it was the schools and his mothers as they totally lied to me about him. They told he was totally self reliant and would not be a problem, I had never had any problems with people who had autism, so I said sure.
Right away it was a living nightmare. He had never lived on his own, never had to share anything with anyone before. I was in the most difficult year of school and I just couldn't handle it. He would take hour long showers when we both had class in the morning, he was really into karate so he was always practicing in the main room (which was sort of scary because he was super obsessed with violent things and was very graphic with me).

I basically had to fight with the building manager and his mom to get out of my lease. I could not live there anymore it was hampering my education and I did not sign up to help him become independent, which is what they wanted I found out as he had been kicked out of every other school hall before mine. I ended up threatening to take it above both their heads as they withheld what living with him would be like to me and they ended up letting me leave no fines.

He could be a really nice kid and I was happy he was going to college, but he should not have been placed with me. And I hate to say it, but he scared me a lot too... He was pretty violent, never actually with me, but he would scream and say how he wanted to beat everyone up with his karate, that's scary to sleep next to when you hear stories on the news about people with autism going on sprees...

GadzQue · Answer

the answer to this question would have been “we have no idea.” Research is now delivering the answers. First and foremost, we now know that there is no one cause of autism just as there is no one type of autism. Over the last five years, scientists have identified a number of rare gene changes, or mutations, associated with autism. A small number of these are sufficient to cause autism by themselves. Most cases of autism, however, appear to be caused by a combination of autism risk genes and environmental factors influencing early brain development.

In the presence of a genetic predisposition to autism, a number of non-genetic, or “environmental,” stresses appear to further increase a child’s risk. The clearest evidence of these autism risk factors involves events before and during birth. They include advanced parental age at time of conception (both mom and dad), maternal illness during pregnancy and certain difficulties during birth, particularly those involving periods of oxygen deprivation to the baby’s brain. It is important to keep in mind that these factors, by themselves, do not cause autism. Rather, in combination with genetic risk factors, they appear to modestly increase risk.

A growing body of research suggests that a woman can reduce her risk of having a child with autism by taking prenatal vitamins containing folic acid and/or eating a diet rich in folic acid (at least 600 mcg a day) during the months before and after conception.

Increasingly, researchers are looking at the role of the immune system in autism. Autism Speaks is working to increase awareness and investigation of these and other issues, where further research has the potential to improve the lives of those who struggle with autism...

404filenotfound · Answer

Now when you say "Autism" do you mean full fledged Autism, or a mild ASD? I've worked with people with special needs for while and at my last job in particular I worked with autistic kids. I will say that while they're some pretty cool kids, a lot of them aren't ever going to be able to function in society. Autism is a pervasive developmental disorder and it carries with it a very high rate of comorbidity. Even if the person just has autism people that glamorize and romanticize it tend to forget about things like compulsive stimming screaming in some cases, individuals that can't communicate verbally or at all in some cases, that can't shower themselves or even take themselves to the bathroom, individuals that can talk that literally punch themselves or bang their heads off of the wall until they bleed because they're frustrated and don't know how to put their thoughts into words, I say it's definitely a prison of the mind. Now that being said, would I date or marry someone that has a very mild ASD like Asperger's? Sure as long as they weren't pretentious and always talking about how it hard it is for them to be "Autistic" when there are people out there who are completely trapped in their heads and have no way of communicating. If they had mild ASD, they'd be a lot like me, so we'd probably get along fine.

Cturner1999 · Answer

I was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome (before they just called Autism). There are some things I can and cannot do. I have hold down a job for a year. I am a college theater major, who happens to be a Sigma Nu. I am waiting to see if I get to be on the show Big Brother at the time I am writing this. I do need some accommodations for both school and work. It might take me longer to get the hang of something, but once I get the hang of it, I will do it with no problem.

As for dating, I never been in a serious relationship, yet. The longest relationship I was in was two months. But I had have a friends with benefits that lasted a few weeks with a girl from college (we didn't have sex, since she was a virgin as well). I did lose my virginity on my 19th birthday to a good friend of mine. (she's 22 and I'm 19) She already had sex a few times, but she told me before hand, she'll walk me through it. (Before anyone ask, yes, I used protection, lol). It was the only time, I have had sex. But at least I can I have had sex.

To anyone with autism who hasn't had sex or find their true love yet. Hang in there, I haven't found the one for me, but I know that there is someone for me.

I have been through a lot in my life, but I have overcome a lot of things in my life, with more challenges along the way.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm not sure tbh. Im still young, and I'm not really quite aware of what love truly is. However, my mother works at a mental hospital, so things like this often scare me. Well, kind of. You see I've always grown up hearing insane stories about people with autism and other disorders trying to hurt normal people and then getting sent to a hospital where my mother works, putting my mother in danger. So I guess when I hear someone has something like autism, it just makes me think a little more. I have anxiety, also, which really doesn't help my situation. There's also this girl who goes to my school, and always has been, and she has Asperger's syndrome. When I talked to her when I was younger she hit me really hard on the head and I have no idea why. So my opinion on it? Rough, I'll admit. Again with all of the stories and other things I hear about people with autism I may be more cautious than most. Would I ever befriend someone with it or date them? Sure. As long as I enjoy their company and personality. Ja think if I'd ever meet a new person with autism or Asperger's I think I'd try to give them a chance just like I'd give any other new person a chance.

bananatossing · Answer

I was diagnosed with ADD as a child and it's something I have been fighting my whole life. I also have just a bit of OCD because of my dad's which is more severe.

While I don't have autism I can relate in having social difficulties while growing up. Acting cold and distant and having people look at you weird or think you are an asshole. Of course, there are degrees of autism but most people with Asperger's can live a "normal life" only obstructed by people and social relations. In a sense calling it a "prison of the mind" is accurate but it does give you strength and understanding in other areas including professional and human behavior.

Also, while I scored reasonably high grades in high school and college and have a high to normal IQ my concentration skills and information reception is often distorted and shuts down at times. I used to daydream all the time but as I grow older it dissipates. Mind you, I'm not the slightest embarrassed with my condition but I don't think anyone who doesn't suffer from either ADD or AS (which are fairly similar www.drhallowell.com/.../) understands the pressure you can often perceive on your mind. Double mind effort on a daily basis isn't easy.

T-shirtsandkneehighs · Answer

My little brother has autism and since I'm his guardian it's a huge part of my life. He's got Asperger's and I really wouldn't have him any other way. It's not an impairment at all, he's the smartest person I know, and the most rational.

Nobody at his school really calls him out for it (there's no way I'm putting him in a special needs school), but he has been noticed for fidgeting a lot and needing to see me fairly regularly, and when he does he likes to rub my shoulder.

He's really the most amazing person I know. It's definitely not a disability in his case.

Southerngirl99 · Answer

I have a friend who is mildly autistic and you can barely tell it. She is a super sweet, pretty girl. You can only really tell when she gets tired. I have to admit, it is hard to have longer conversations with her and she gets bored quickly. It hurt my feelings at first before I knew about her autism because I thought she was a little rude. She invited me to help out with her at VBS and ditched me later. As far as obsession goes, she always feels as if she has to look nice and is a little OCD over her appearance. There are worse things and she always has cute clothes and her hair done nicely and I look sloppy in comparison lol. I had no clue she was autistic until her mom told my mom and my mom told me. I was very surprised.

Honestly, I don't think I could date an autistic guy though. Just personal preference. I could be friends with someone with autism (and I am), but I don't think I could be in a long term relationship with an autistic guy.

EverythingReal · Answer

The longest relationship I've ever had was with someone who was autistic (3 year long relationship).

I think depending on the degree and type obviously, autistic people tend to be extremely intelligent and very unique. My ex was very goofy at times, but could be serious as well. The only time you would ever even suspect it is if he was angry or if we were at a crowded place. Obviously, depending on where a person falls on a spectrum, will determine how much their autism will be noticed.

I didn't know he was autistic until mid relationship when his mom mentioned it, obviously it made plenty of sense then, but I loved him just as much as I did before I knew, it made no difference to my heart.

Hidden_P · Answer

My brother is autistic. I don't see him as any different, he annoys me just as much as my other brothers who don't have it.
It can be challenging for both sides because of how he thinks of things.

I don't see it as any of those things. It's not a disability, or an impairment, it's a different way of looking at things. If you have to label it, I suppose it's a "curse" because the world must be so different... looking at things literally and logically.

As for would I marry/be in a relationship... it depends. My brother is my brother so of course he annoys me. I love people for who they are, so I wouldn't write them off if they had it, but I wouldn't actively seek it. I've only been with non-autistic people and it can be useful when I need to unload about my brother.

pineneedle · Answer

I think autism is just... not always one thing. I think for some people it can be an illness, or feel like one sometimes, because of how other people react to it like their families and friends as well as new people.
For others it can be a blessing.
And for most it's just another difference, cause really as humans we all think differently anyway.
My cousin is autistic, but he's someone who does need help... i don't know what you'd call that low functioning in terms of the spectrum or what, and he's a total sweetheart. But the way his parents deal and the lack of control he has living with them (which he doesn't seem to mind, like he hasn't said anything and it is a really loving household don't get me wrong).. for them it's seen as an illness, and something they all have to cope with.
I would date someone with autism.
I think it's all those things at one point or another.

annedechasse · Answer

I only recently found out my partner is a high functioning Autism sufferer. It was an online questionnaire which we did for a laugh. It made sense of our long time together in about half an hour, what an eye-opener!

I have always been extremely patient and had no idea except I worried occasionally about the depression which was a bit severe maybe twice a year. It has meant we have very few friends but the ones we have are very special.
The positive side is that he is very single minded when it comes to problems and can find a solution to nearly anything eventually. The computer age is a boon as he can be absorbed with other peoples problems for days as a hobby. He will go to the ends of the earth to help his friends.
Multi tasking is not an option though. It has helped to have a lot of animals around us and he has a gift for massage with them. They trust him completely. As do I. He is special to me and to everyone he knows well.

Mesonfielde · Answer

Autism is strange. But strange is okay as long as you are not impaired by it. High functioning autism can actually be useful. But actual mental retardation or low functioning autism, nobody's got time for that... My "cousin" (as far as I know, not actually related by blood though) has autism, or at least he has been diagnosed with it - he is strange, but he excels at school and is pretty damn smart. Considering it is a spectrum, it is hard to tell just what it can manifest as. I don't know enough about this subject, really. My mother would, she worked with autistic kids for a while.

JustinCaseUDontKnow · Answer

My counselors son got Autism and me her talked about me having some
type of learning disability but it's not really have been clearly diagnosed
it's just some type cause i don't learn like others do but i don't see Autism
being any type of curse and I wouldn't know much about what causes it
some say childhood disease vaccinations but than i know people my age
got the same vaccinations but i perfectly fine with living a fulfilling life with
job, marriage, wife, kids. maybe my mental illnesses be the main problem.

Dannieee · Answer

Autism is, so to speak "a blessing and a curse". I would not be able to date someone if they did not like physical touch, because I love it, but I know some people with severe autism who actually love their hand being held out their back rubbed, etc.. People with autism are typical really smart and it would be really cool to hear their take on things and just have deep conversation. As far as I can tell, I have very minor autism-like symptoms, so I could understand them to a degree. So.. It depends.

emmabee11 · Answer

I'm mixed because i get some people are severely autistic where they have difficulty with day-to-day tasks but i've not had a very good experience with someone who is autistic ether... i liked him but he didn't like me... he messed me about a lot on and off and led me on a little bit then played the autisim card... everyone believed him that it was his autisim, he went around calling me a psycho and a stalker but autisim doesn't cause someone to do that... i get it can cause bad behavior but... no... you have to be careful, i know enough about life and the people we live amongst these days to know autisim doesn't cause someone to pick on you like that... i can believe people who are severely autistic but i just don't trust people who are only moderately autistic. I get it that it's great they possess a super talent because of how it effects their brain.. . but it doesn't make them better than us.

Findingmyway · Answer

I have A LOT of experience with it but prefer to discuss privately. Autism (while disabling at times depending on spectrum placement) is a different ability, not a disability. Success in life and tools for regulation and coping come easier when understood. To draw an ASD into your life, you must join theirs first and find the magnet. I could go on for hours. If you have questions pm me.,

snowgirl89 · Answer

I think autism is just a disability.. for those who do not understand it, I do, I have experience with it since a family member has it and I have taken a great care of that family member.

Yes, I can imagine going into a long relationship/marriage with a person who has autism.. it's easy to learn into people with autism and therefor easy for me to understand them.

It's surely a prison of the mind if the person does not get the help he/she needs, but with the right help, right medication and a ton of patience it's just a blessing:)

I always say to my sister: "Autism is a blessing, you are stronger for it and I wish all the people in the world were like you" :] And I mean it!!!

I hope this helps you, if you have more questions, feel free to ask :)

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