What's wrong with me? My peers are all doing internships and traveling, yet I dont really want to and I'm just frozen and lazy?

[LaBoheme099]

I'm a junior at a really great private college. I had a 4.0 in high school to get into it. I'm majoring in psych and I plan to go to grad school after.

My gpa is 3.3, which is okay.. Not the best but okay considering I had some bad bouts of existential depression. However, now, I see my peers studying abroad and/or working internships this coming summer for what they wanna do, and honestly... I am just doing the minimal course load and then I wanna be off and have fun over summer. As in, I wanna party, meet guys, goof off, make amazing memories, and work at some coffee shop for some money... Is this setting me back? They all seem so gung-ho to do all this stuff and pack their resumes with all this extra fluff and I feel like I'm shooting myself in the foot by not doing anything. Especially since my gpa isn't spectacular.

But I don't know, I don't really know what I would do, and I honestly don't know what I want to do with life in general. Sure I am majoring in psych because the field interests me, but I have no idea what I want to do with it and all careers look like bullshit to me (In all fields.. I have explored my options). I don't really have strong direction and I don't know what I want from life, so I'm buying time by being young and having fun... Is it a waste? A mistake?
I feel like the only thing I have going for me is that I AM really smart in life and school.. I've worked hard to help my brain the best I could; I'm artistic, and quite attractive I must say... But I feel like I'm wasting it all.

[BeerFarts]

Life is too short not to have fun. You can't compare yourself to your friends. You worked hard during school so why not reward yourself by having fun?

Life is not a competition, sweetie. If you look at it that way then you're going to always be miserable.

Have fun while you're still young. You'll find the motivation eventually. I was in your shoes once.

[LaBoheme099]

Thank you. You're absolutely right.

I adore your name by the way (;

[BeerFarts]

You're welcome :)

And regarding my username, I'm glad that you like it. Most people find it hilarious but I kind of regret choosing it now that I've shown my face (I didn't plan on showing my face at first).

That's what I get for being a dumbass. Lol.

[Anonymous]

You have to find what actually motivates you and use it. Don't pretend you care about the things other people care about if you don't. Look deeper into what you mean by "having fun", do you want a supportive peer group that values you? Are you afraid you will lose that in the wider world? That sort of thing. It should come easily to you if you are into psychology.

[EmpatheticLady]

Your GPA really is fine. If you're that concerned, try to pick up your studies now and in following courses. There is nothing wrong with wanting to take a break from college over the summer and enjoy yourself. It may help your depression to get out and about during that time. Just don't do a ton of partying while in school as that they set you back further.