My boyfriend thinks I'll leave him if I lose a lot of weight. Why would he think that?

[Anonymous]

Okay, so we've both talked about losing weight. He brought up the fact that he needed to lose weight, yesterday. I said I'd work out with him so we would both be motivated. He told me he didn't want me losing too much weight because if I did, I'd leave him.

He knows I love him with all my heart and that I would never leave him. I told him that and he still thinks I would. What do I do? Why would he think that? Is he just being insecure?

[xvbabyyx]

If you want to lose weight you should do it to be healthier, stronger, and to just all around feel better about your self. Don't let anyone stand in your way when it comes to leading a healthier life style. Be sure to constantly let him know how important he is to you but don't let any negativity keep you from your goals. If at some point it turns out that you feel like its not just his insecurities and it seems like he is being controlling then you might want to reconsider the relationship. It could easily turn in to a mentally abusive relationship if some boundaries aren't set. But hey, it might be that he ends up really likes the changes in your body and then decides to support you, and want to better him self. You could be the catalyst. I have recently lost 15 lbs. And I feel so much better about my self, I am really happy and I want to keep pushing my self to my limits. I wish you the best of luck with your weight loss goals and your relationship. If you need support or wanna trade work out/ diet tips feel free to add me. :)

[Deft_maiden]

Sounds like a typical passive aggressive behavior used by a manipulating/insecure guy.

[anonymousbastard]

WTF seriously?

[heavensgift2girls]

He thinks that because it happens all the time. If two people are in an equals in a relationship, and one improves themselves somehow, often they will start to think they are better than their current partner. They then start looking to upgrade their partner because, they believe they deserve a partner that is at least their equal.

[sfauo]

He thinks that once you lose weight, you'll look better, then notice more guys are interested, then decide you can get a better guy, then dump him for this new dude, and then he's left alone. That's what he's thinking.

Definitely insecure and doesn't completely trust you.

[anonymousbastard]

He thinks you will turn out better looking then him. See this is how the female brain works.

Girl dates fat guy says she loves him.

Girl tells fat guy he need to lose weight, so he does with the help of the GF

Girl friend becomes super hot looking gets, noticed by other men, she dumps BF.

[Deft_maiden]

Real good then. Glad you have it all worked out!

[Anonymous]

Because some actually women do that.

Hell - here even was such question recently, a woman said she wants to dump her now "too bad for her" boyfriend as she became slim from being obese.

I don't think that he is (merely) insecure, he knows and has seen such situations and assumes that yours might be the same.

[Anonymous]

He's insecure; you should lose weight if you want to with or without him; he's insecure; yes.

[anonymousbastard]

So why is it OK for women to be insecure all the damn time but a guy can't be?

[Opinion Owner]

Did I say it wasn't ok? I just answered her ?s

[anonymousbastard]

Don't twist my words around.

[Opinion Owner]

You are twisted enough. I do not PMS...but it seems you do. That woman was only saying hello to you, I am sure nothing else. How can someone saying hello freak you out so much? And my comment set you off? ANGER MANAGEMENT, my friend, ANGER MANAGEMENT. ASAP

[Anonymous]

He's being insecure.

Ask him why he's being insecure.

[the90swerethebest]

Because I've seen it happen on here

[youllthinkofme]

Because he thinks you'll become too good for him.