I'm very ugly. What to do?

[Anonymous]

I'm a 26 year old man from India. I'm EXTREMELY ugly to the extent of being mirror cracking material. Unfortunately, like all humans, I too sometimes develop feelings towards women. But due to my extreme ugliness I can never talk to women, let alone ask them out. I do dress well and maintain good hygiene. I also don't have any habits such as smoking, drinking or drugs. Even then, what's the use if I'm basically terrible looking? Due to this, I've never been in a relationship, and I'm sure no woman would agree to marry someone as ugly as me. I thought of plastic surgery to improve my looks, but I can't afford it as I'm not so rich. Its very painful to see everyone else having girlfriends and wives, while I don't have that privilege and never will. So I just wanted to know, is there any way to prevent me from getting attracted to women, either by drugs or surgery? Can I opt for castration, and is it safe? Please help. Thank you.

[relationshipDNA]

I know some mirror cracking guys who get all the girls they want, why? Because while they can't afford to work on their face, they have complete control over there bodies. One particular friend of mine changed his life in 6 months. How...he started body building.

Women love a great body, point blank period. Besides the obvious carnal attraction, there's just something about people who take care of their bodies...it takes discipline, motivation and some level of self respect to get to an extra-ordinary physical state. It says all the right things about you.

So instead of wallowing in your deficiencies...start building your body and build up your confidence at the same time. I'd also think about taking some self defense classes or ultimate fighting courses. When you know you can kick anybody's ass, it has a way of negating all of the things you feel inadequate about.

I'd just like to say that you can still make lemonade when you've been dealt lemons. The way you speak about yourself is what's truly ugly...and I can tell you, people smell it...it oozes out of your skin and repels people. So you're essentially creating your own vicious cycle of self-degredation. They don't like me because I'm ugly...because they think I'm ugly, I must be ugly.

Sorry. I don't subscribe to that kind of herd mentality. People will believe what you want them to believe so do yourself a favor and start writing the script for your life and instead of letting the world and people write it for you.

My life is a dark, satiric comedy...what's yours? If you don't like it, tear it up and re-write it.

I wish you luck.

[PlayFair]

First of all, you're hilarious! Keep working on the humor a bit. If you could make me laugh all day, I'd date you. How ugly are you? It's all subjective, you know? I mean as long as your teeth are there, and your skin isn't trying to falling off in chunks just to get away from your face...I think it might be okay. There are ways around things. We are as 'visual' beings as men are. Guys like things that look nice. Women like things that make them feel a certain way. Look at George Lopez. He is hideous. I'm telling you the humor thing is the golden ticket. Try it.

[PlayFair]

**meant men are visual creatures, women are not.

[WickedEyedLeo]

"Women are not visual" speak for yourself.

[AshBrown]

Agreed on everything ... except poor George Lopez. He's not hideous... Hahaha ... But that made me crack up ... :))))

[PlayFair]

WickedEyeLeo: **most women. Happy? Here is an article to support my statement. link

[Anonymous]

Girls don't really care so much about a guy's look as like we care about a girls looks. They care about the personality way more, they want a confident and funny guy. Work on your personality, read books: "Double your dating" by David DeAngelo is good, its an e-book, you can download it right now! Also "The Game" by Neil Strauss is quite interesting. Although I don't really believe in the whole pick-up-artist thing, I think it's just lying and cheating to get girls into bed. Use the books to know which are the best parts about your personality and develop them more.

There's one tip I can give you about you're ugliness: Make jokes about it yourself, self-mockery is the best defence mechanism it also shows confidence and that you have sense of humor.

P.S. To make my point even better: People tell me that I'm good looking and I used to be a disaster with girls because I lacked confidence (a lot!). I was single for years, since I've red those books and got to work on my confidence things are going a lot better for me. I'm still in the quest to find a girl I really love though, but I think that goes for a lot of people...

[Anonymous]

Normal people do not seek out castration or to eliminate their sexual drive, no matter how ugly they are.

The fact that you have fixated on these options, is a good indication that you're not right in the head - you should seek professional therapeutic help.

[PricelessPearl]

Okay.. a really nice guy that I met yesterday told me that he was ugly. He posted a pic & I didn't think he was ugly at all... I thought he was cute. But for so many years he believed peoples lies. People would call me ugly & my sis. Do you think that I care what people say to me.. they can't get me down. They are the ones that are ugly in their hearts.

I am sure that you aren't ugly.. you just have a low self-esteem & girls notice that.

I have seen guys that weren't that attractive anyways & they could get a girl because they were happy in their own skin.

Be happy with who you are & people will see & will be happy with the way you are too.

[maverick120287]

i m totally agree with her dude

[Najna]

Forget that you're ugly and get yourself a sense of humor. You'd be surprised how it can increase one's attractiveness. There are guys that I know who I thought were unattractive when I first met them, but after they started talking and I've felt their positive energy and they made me laugh, all of a sudden I thought "they look just fine to me" lol.

[AshBrown]

Great answer. Very valid.

[adamfk1]

youre either born with a sense of humor or not. I'm not born with a sense of humor and I'm ugly . Guess I'm never going to get a girlfriend :(

[honeychick]

Stop believing you're ugly. Beauty comes in many different shapes and sizes. Besides, you shouldn't put yourself down; you gotta be your own cheerleader. Also I'm positive castration won't help. Be confident in yourself and befriend people who can help you out in the looks department. But when it comes down to it the looks aren't that big a deal.If your with-or become attracted to people- who will belittle or make fun of your looks then you don't need to be with them.

[xzinax2]

you're young,you maintain good hygiene,you don't have any appearance deteriorating habits-i doubt you're as unattractive as you think. have you actually been told by several people you're ugly? even then,looks are subjective,and there are many ways to get someone to like you without fitting the standard for attractiveness.

[Distant]

You have to stop thinking you're ugly. That's all you can do. Beauty is subjective. If you spend your life comparing yourself to everyone else, you'll be miserable.

[PricelessPearl]

Yes.. agreed!

[AshBrown]

Agreed.

[xoxo98]

just work out until you have a perfect body! Then your face will not have as much value. Also wear good colgne and keep being funny because smelling nice and sense of humor instantly increase attraction!

[Little-Hippie]

Just get really REALLY buff.

Then it won't matter if you're ugly.

Just look at big Sean Allen or Kai Greene.

Neither of them have very aesthetic looking faces, but I'm certain they get chicks.

[Stacyzee]

I see ugly people in relationships all of the time.

What will get you through is confidence and feeling secure of yourself.

[WickedEyedLeo]

I wouldn't worry about it. Some girls go for a guy that is just super funny and really bright. You seem to be that based off your post. And you have no bad habits like smoking? You're a winner in someone's book.

[furlee33]

where are you live?