does anyone have any tips what I can do or how anyone else has overcome this?
How to make eye contact when talking to someone?
does anyone have any tips what I can do or how anyone else has overcome this?
I've got this one.
Pretend you're confident during practice sessions.
While you're out in public, for instance after you've parked your car and are heading in to a store, practice making eye contact and carrying yourself with confidence. Once you're in the store you can go back to avoiding eye contact if you need to.
When I retreat into my inner sanctum and don't want to have any human contact, I start with something easy like practicing smiling. I answer questions like this, and don't click the anonymous button. I actually let my fingers brush the palm of the girl behind the register. Basically, I take baby steps towards being sociable.
Even if people suck quite a bit at the time.
You're in my age group so you'll get this reference. I use Saturday Night Fever to help me with the parking lot eye contact exercise. Just imagine "Staying Alive" by the BeeGees is playing, and you're John Travolta.
I imagine the song is playing in the background.
BTW, that's also a funny time waster at work. When you see your boss or that nerdy guy from accounting walking past, just imagine "Staying Alive" playing for them. Hehe.
When you're speaking with someone in person, and you haven't had enough time to practice on strangers, try just looking around their face.
I used to focus on the space between their eyelashes. Then I'd look at the bridge of their nose, or their cheekbones. It was only when I looked in their eyes that I'd freak out.
After practicing on people that I'd pass in the street, it was easier. When you're passing someone you know they're going to be out of sight before they make you nervous.
Picture an upside-down triangle that extends from each eyebrow to their nose. Look at one point of the triangle for a few seconds then shift your gave to the next point in the triangle. Repeat moving your gaze from point to point in this manner.
This serves a couple of purposes. First you "appear" to be making eye contact but your gaze in not directly into their eyes so it doesn't come off as challenging or unsettling to either of you. this also doesn't make it look like you are staring at a single point on their face making them insecure, like the have a blemish or something there.
It works. Try it!
start carrying a flask around with you lol I'm just joking around and know the feeling. sometimes I get incredibly nervous and use to have a bad twitch around my mouth lol geezuz talk about embarassing especially when they notice and their whole point of focus was on my twitch haha
i personally don't like it when someone is staring at me when they're talking. sometimes it actually comes across as tho they're challenging me. I like to think about what someone is saying when they're talking to me and I usually focus on something else in the room when I'm listening. or as another tactic when someone is talking to you look just to their right of their face when they're talking. one last tactic I've heard (and not sure if I actually have) is try and picture them naked when they're talking to you lol apparently that helps with anxieity. I hope these ideas help.
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Smile while talking, and use hand motions. Both of these draw the eyes occasionally so if he or she is in a locked gaze, they will be distracted from your eyes by the motion of hands or the smile.
Its not necessary to stare someone down every time you talk, but to give a healthy 5 seconds when you are making a point or trying to agree on something is important to reach recognition with the other. It means trust.
Best of luck, the only other tip is to keep trying. Cheers!
Look at the bridge of the nose or slightly above, where the eyebrows would meet.
ha ha I've heard of that one, thanks. I did try it but it didn't work, Ill try and work harder on it. thanks
you don't have to hold eye contact. just reference back to their eyes. having said this 3 seconds is about the longest you want to go with out looking back at their eyes. that is my experience any way.
As many have said, you don't have to keep looking in their eyes. Look elsewhere on the face. Just make sure you don't stare at the lips too much. :)
Look at their forehead or eyebrows. Looking right above the eyes can give the impression of looking into the eyes
what I do is look into their eyes for about 3 seconds and then look off to the side then back.
Look at their nose or forehead instead.
your going to hurt his ass. just do it and get it over with!
If you feel like you want to look away, just keep looking.
look at their forehead or eyebrows. Looking right above the eyes can give the impression of looking into the eyes of someone
Look at him and say "suck me beautifull"
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