How do I ask my boyfriend to lose some weight without hurting his feelings?

[Anonymous]

He's not morbidly obese, but he is about 30-40 pounds overweight. He's not very active and I'm genuinely worried about his health. He drinks a lot of energy drinks and I've never seen him touch a vegetable. Not only that, but I'm just not as attracted to him as I used to be. I'd really like him to lose some weight, but he's a really sensitive guy and I'm really afraid of hurting his feelings. Has anyone had success in encouraging a significant other to lose weight? If so, how did you do it?

[BamaY]

Trick him, say you wanna go run or go work out. Then ask if he'll join you, if he is takin back say I really need to run but I want you with me just in case. Make him feel like if he goes with you, he's your hero. If he's like most guys once he starts losing weight he'll generally feel better and will start asking you to work out with him. As for the eating habits, learn to cook a healthy meal but first ask if he'll eat what you cook cause you really wanna know his opinion on your plates. Introduce him to Mio or a energy powder you put in water Tang has a few, get him to find a flavor he likes, It's cheaper than energy drinks with the same effect. If you wanna stay with him his recovery will be a battle so before you start make sure your willing to stay in it. Cause if you start and leave mid way threw he'll revert and a lot of times when a guy relapses he does it to an extreme and his health will be even more in danger.

[shineegirl]

Well said! :)

[sammysamson84]

sounds like the way to do it ... motivation is the key ...

[Hoofdpijn]

Don't worry about hurting his feelings. Tell him the truth. DO NOT make a policy of lying for the other person's feelings in a relationship. It's condescending and lets problems perpetuate. In reality, if you have to hurt his feelings a bit to get him motivated to change, you're doing him the dual favor of getting him to change (beneficial for its own sake) and teaching him that just because you said something that might hurt now, it doesn't mean you don't care about him / want to leave him.

I convinced my ex to lose weight by telling her she was getting fat and I found it unattractive. I told her I still loved her, but I can't help what I'm attracted to, and she needs to pay more attention to her diet and exercise. She was PISSED at first, but ultimately came out to be more of a fitness and health junky than me, and loved it!

[Asker]

Hmmm. I see what you mean. It's just that he's so good to me. He's always been very understanding and patient with me, and I have problems too.

[martyfellow]

Only 2 ways work: 1) Get some articles on nutrition and health and have him read them.

2) Set an example; Cook up some dellicious rice and vegetable type dishes

and wolf them down in front of him. Don't offer him any until he

begs. Ask him to go play tennis or work out with you at the gym.

What not to do: Nag him when he eats poorly. But pour out the energy drinks in front of him.

[BamaY]

While I'll agree to the last part of 2. Number one can set him off in the bad direction, becoming self conscious and actually eating more in depression. Also "wolfing" down food in-front of him if he's not interested in Vegetables it won't phase him one bit. To get some one to change there ways trickery is the only sure fire way. My brothers girlfriend tried number one on him he began to fast and got extremely sick losing to much weight.

[martyfellow]

Not many guys can resist tasty food, even if it has vegetables. Plus, he knows he ought to be eating better in the first place, so he'll come around with this kind of coaxing.

[lauramor]

tell him you went to the doctor and he suggested you work out more to have more enevergy or lower your suger levels or something and then ask him to do it with you because nobody else wants to. tell him it would be great to do it as a couple and to like a healthier life

[BlueEyedHipsta]

"Lets get fit and healthy together, a couple who works out together stays together"

[Konnour]

Become fitness junkie - fill all your free time only with sports-related activities and pull him into that all - if he'll want to be near you he will be forced to do something active

..for example - when you got back home, don't just sit at the couch in front of TV - wear your running shoes and tell you're going out for a run!

And for the weekends, take your bicycle and tell you're going to be out all day, that you're going to another town, closer to nature or something!

[Iamnobody]

Tell him you're really into this new weight loss program and you'd like him to join you in it.

[harveykinkle]

Make him exercise with you then bang or bj him after somewhat like giving a dog a treat for a trick.

Exercise will be his favorite and he will get hotter by the day !

[no_bs]

yes, yes, a million times yes

[rjroy3]

Honestly, if you want him to lose weight then you need to lose weight with him. Make it a lifestyle change. Make some healthy meals for dinner. Do more shopping for whole organic foods.

[Anonymous]

just leave random things around that would give him the hint to lose wright

[kheserthorpe]

Which of you has the higher sex drive?

[Asker]

Me. His sex drive has gone down a lot.

[kheserthorpe]

So you need advice on how to turn around your not-quite-obese over-sensitive lethargic and low sex drive boyfriend's spiral.

Remind me why you're with him?

[Asker]

Heh. Because I'm still in love with him, in spite of it all.

[Andrew811]

Get him some running shoes