The Truth About Being Ugly

[Anonymous]

Everyone is beautiful in there own special way!

Sorry that's a lie; there is no such thing as everyone is beautiful, there is a set standard of what beauty is, and not everyone meets that standard, from body type, to facial structure, the length of hair, all of this comes into play when being attractive.

And it sucks when you don't meet that standard; cause there's nothing you can do, a side from plastic surgery. I started to realize I was ugly in middle school, cause I would get picked on but I did nothing too these kids they would just naturally wanna pick on me and I didn't understand why, so in the beginning I would fight back cause as a man you don't wanna get bullied, but at a certain point I realized they would pick on me for what I looked like and it hurt me emotionally cause I already didn't meet the standard but why bother me cause I don't have the looks, so I kept too myself most of the time too avoid fighting.

But sometime through out my middle school year, a girl asked me out and I was shocked cause I was surprised she could even find me attractive, and on top of that ask me out, I've never felt so happy honestly cause I would see all these guys getting attention and I was happy for them and now I was getting some attention myself and as a kid you don't question things to much, but about 2 weeks in I found out she was using me to try and attract another boys attention and make him jealous by hanging around me, I never walked home so sad in my life I tried to hold back my tears ( I'm trying to hold it back right now actually) but I cried in silence when I got home.

During my highschool years I kept too myself mostly, didn't have many friends and I was actually expelled from high school. for not letting someone punk me and fighting back, at that point I hated school hated the guys and the girls I didn't even wanna look at them, and I didn't have to anymore for almost a full year I had peace for once, but through out that year I noticed something I have a brother and he is more attractive than me, and that didn't bother until I noticed my mom would treat him better than me and listen to him more than me, he would ask for something important and get it quickly, while when I spoke my voice was unheard and thrown to the side, on top of that my brother calls me ugly so it doesn't really help.

So now that I'm older I don't lie too myself I've accepted that I'm ugly, it still bothers me but less all I wanted was too be treated better than what I look like.

[BuchitaBuchys]

I think we as a society and nature in general puts such an emphasis on looks. It's sad, but it's how the world works. Sometimes I wish we were all blind and the only thing we'd have is our personalities and mannerisms to judge each other by.

I'm sorry for what you went through and I'm wondering how you're doing now.

I remember getting bullied in middle school a lot because I was hitting puberty and becoming ugly. One of my "friends" even made a song about me and sang it out loud every chance he got. It was the song "Mr. Lonely" by Akon. Instead of "Lonely, I am so lonely, I have no body, to call my own", he'd say "ugly, Delia's so ugly. She'll never have anyone to call her own". All I could do was laugh with the whole class but inside I felt like crap.
I decided to not be friends with him anymore because he'd constantly make fun of my acne and the fact that I still wasn't even an A cup while the other girls were in C and Ds.
He also had his friends who they all made fun of me until I got into a fight with one of them because I was so tired of being their laughing stock.

It's an ugly world for the ugly. Instead of us saying "everyone's beautiful! You're all beautiful and you matter!" I wish people would say instead "not everyone's beautiful. But you don't need to be beautiful to matter."

[Bluemax]

"not everyone's beautiful. But you don't need to be beautiful to matter."

(standing ovation) Bravo! Bravo! (tossing a rose on the stage) Bravo! Bravo!

That's a quote for the ages, Buchita. Ought to be proud of that one.

[BuchitaBuchys]

@Bluemax thank you. Occasionally I say something reasonable. Even a broken clock is right at least twice a day ;)

[Bluemax]

And a clock that runs backwards is even more accurate. Perhaps you are a clock running backwards. ;)

[carinerose]

@Bluemax Amazing speech.

[Bluemax]

@carinerose
I believe you meant to compliment buchita. All I did was stand and cheer.

[BuchitaBuchys]

@Bluemax lol I think it's because it's odd for me to say something that actually makes sense instead of judging and making fun of someone.
Ewww. I don't like this new, non hurtful me.

[Bluemax]

"Ewww. I don't like this new, non hurtful me."

Well, I do.

[BuchitaBuchys]

@Bluemax well, the bitch is back lol I'm not nice anymore.

[Bluemax]

It seems like "The Bitch is Back" could be the name of a song, poem, or novel.

You should write one.

[BuchitaBuchys]

@Bluemax I will lol

[DarkHumorRUs]

Have you ever considered that it could be something other than your looks as well?

[carinerose]

This is horrible. I can try and sugarcoat it as much as I want by telling you that not everybody is like that, but it would be a lie. So here, you have the truth. Appearance matters. And it's pretty much fucked up, but it's the way it is. Beauty is not something everyone CAN have because of SOCIETY. It goes on like this, you are pretty or somewhat in that range of average good-looking people and everyone likes you. Worse, you are "gorgeous" and people treat you like the savior of the Earth and mankind. It's disgusting that society has come to this... but I can't criticize it because despite of myself, I am like everyone else. I'm attracted to pretty people and become friends with people who look like me. But just remember this : not everyone can be beautiful, but everyone can be smart and witty and funny if they want to. Beauty has its own pretty important place in society nowadays, but everyone suddenly becomes beautiful in that SAME DAMN WAY. People who are different stand out. People who are confident of who they are, even though they're not Brad Pitt in his Troy days. People who are themselves, and just don't give a fuck, and just act the way they want to act and dress the way they REALLY want to dress, and don't take shit from anybody. Be that person, and I can guarantee you you'll be the most "beautiful" person in a crowd.

[Raven1990]

your advice is the best he can do, he needs to work within, he needs to craft his soul.
the beauty of the soul is eternal since it comes from within whereas external appearance fades with time

[phil2]

I grew up with my mom telling me that I was ugly. She paid more attention to my sister and treated her better because she was more beautiful. I ended up with social anxiety disorder, and I think my sister is a narcissistic mean person who cheated on all her exes and has no empathy skills because she lies a lot. I don't care anymore about looks because I just care about my personality and morals. Those who matter don't put me down and belittle my feelings. People who do, are labeled unempathetic, and I ignore em. You know what? You have to learn to love your self and value your self to move on. Repeat after me, I am a beautiful person, a wonderful person, and I am loveable, and I believe that I am a nice, kind, thoughtful, amazing person. I am worth it, I value myself. I am going to have a wonderful, happy, healthy life. I am going to enjoy myself. Also, I would go out and make friends with people who are also positive.

[Raven1990]

that was very mean for a mom telling her own child that she is ugly! a real mom would never do that even if her child is really ugly!

[asceli0n]

Ahh.. Sadly.. I sometimes think to myself why the handsome-beauty criticising exist? What the fuck happens if some girl dated a good hearted but below the average guy. What changes in her life except some other people's comments. Why in these days most of the people are only falling in love with appearances.. This is the hurting fact of life and also an unfair ghost law of society.. People say the inner good is important but they forget something; I always remember this quote " No matter how much good you have inside, nobody will be curious or interested to see your inner good if you don't have a good appearance."

[LiveFreeorDieHard]

So in other words, lifes a bitch and then you die. Look, i consider myself average and in sire a lot of girls do too lol but you can't let this stuff hold you back. Dont feel depressed about the bad stuff about you. Just live your life and be the rockstar in your own life. Dont conpare yourself to other guys and just do you. Besides, girls are fucking complicated, I've seen guys who i thought were ugly getting laid while a guy i thought was really attractive was getting none. Who knows right. Life is a struggle and i hope you realise there is a lot more to living lifd thn being a pretty face or getting with girls.

[Anonymous]

I've always been way better looking, in a classical beauty standards way than my brother (no offense bro!) face and body. I have better defined features, prettier eyes a more handsome face and a much better body. And he always got more girls than me. Not by a close margin either. And not ugly girls either.
You know why? Cause he's just a fucking awesome dude. That's why.

So yeah. Looks. Not really a factor. Being an awesome person is though.

You should work on that self esteem, being through abuse is rough. It'll fuck anyone up. The more you can be proud of yourself, your life, the happier you become, the more attractive you'll be.

[ivyowl]

Who you are on the inside is all that matters in the end. IN THE END. I get treated horrible too because of the way I look. Even the guys that chase me for sex treat me as if I have little value. IF you can get past the pain there are good things about being unattractive.

[ConsultantIsBack]

Well, there's a list of a few things you can do to optimize your sexual attractiveness.
Hygiene, working out and getting jacked/abs, etc., style, commuication skills, sense of humor, superior career and income, ambition, personality, teeth whitening, and so on.

[Anonymous]

Well dude I can tell you something like that, I dont believe there are ugly people there are people who dont pay attention on theirselves. Some people are lucky and they are gifted from god, they are too handsome or very beautiful they dont need to work hard to be good looking but others do. Maybe you aren't gifted by god but you can still be handsome how?

Simple, first of all lose some fats if you have and have a lean, shapeful face. You can change your looks without plastic surgery to, there are facial exercises everywhere and I can say they are useful thats how I got my Amazing jawline and high cheek bones. Do some facial exercises, have a masculine face, change your hair style, grow a nice beard and go to gym you will see girls staring at you toe to head.

[jacquesvol]

It's more about meeting the 'canons' , the fads of the decade, than about pure beauty (or uglyness) These women aren't accepted anymore:

www.art-wallpaper.com/.../...s-1600x1200-20655.jpg (the Three Graces, 1639 oil painting by Rubens)

They were accepted back then (actually, one of them was the painter's wife -not his ex)

[Jeydee]

I disagree. An attractive face is attractive because it's well-proportioned. Say Justin Bieber and Chris Evans, who meets the canons? Both look so different but are considered attractive, because their faces are well-proportioned. I was considered unattractive before surgery, attractive after surgery because my face is well-proportioned now but I still look like my old self, I'm not a different person. Hope you get what I mean.

[BruceTrails]

I'm with you man, got bullied in college for the same thing went to a psychologist and accepted my fate.

[skeptic007]

I'm sorry to hear that maybe the women can help on this better than me

[John_Doesnt]

Yeah, being ugly sucks. People ignore me and try to avoid me as best they can.

[Bluemax]

Very interesting. More on this later.

[Bluemax]

Firstly, I would say that I am very sorry that you went through that as a child and young adult. Your experiences with your parents confirmed a study once done which shows that parents are less attentive to their less attractive offspring. The same is true of teachers, by the way. It works both ways. Children are more attentive to attractive adults than their lesser attractive counterparts.

I'd like to ask you a few questions, if I may.
Firstly, how do you respond to people who tell you, "Don't be bitter?"
How do you respond to people who tell you, "No one is entitled to love, romance, attention, or conversation?"

I am working on a mytake related to this subject. I'm having trouble publishing it though, I suspect because of some of the illustrations.

There was a Psychology Today article about being unattractive. When I find it again, I'll post it. It might be interesting for you to read.

[girlinthemirror]

if u have a good personality u can't be ugly

[someindianguycringe]

how come this doesn't have more downvotes

[lolitalulz]

so you're ugly, and? get over it.