Why do a lot of people care about looks?

I know I'm guilty of this as well, but I don't understand why people are so subjective that they need to have a physical appearance attractiveness, whenever it should really be based on how their attitude and personality is like. What are your thoughts?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I am not attractive, but I can understand why people aren't interested in someone they aren't attracted to. What bothers me is when people go out of their way to be rude about looks. I've been interested in many men, and I am always understanding if they aren't interested back. I've never thought of them to be shallow or anything else like that. I understand that they can't be with me if they aren't interested. The problem is, many of them have actually been rude to me about it. It doesn't happen as much anymore, but when I was younger guys would normally act like it was such a horrible thing for someone like me to be interested in them. They had no problems with insulting me at all.

    Maybe it's because not too many men have been interested in me, but I would be flattered if a guy was interested in me. So far I haven't had one interested yet (that I know of) but I would give the guy a chance. If for some reason I didn't want to (which is doubtful) I would never be rude to them about it.

    I don't understand why looks should determine if you should be nice to someone or not.

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    • Understood and I cried a little because you remind me of how I was treated as growing up. No guy ever found me attractive and they only saw me worthy as a fuck object instead of a real human being. I used to get horribly harassed, mainly by the really idiotic people, by them saying that I got knocked up with this one guy (who I hated) at the age of 10. Meanwhile I was a virgin up until the age of 19 where I lost it to my first and current boyfriend.
      I believe looks really determine what type of person you are if you ask me.

What Guys Said 22

  • "Guilty" of it? Are you kidding?
    You can't be attracted to someone and want to be in a relationship with them if you aren't physically attracted to them. It just doesn't work. Looks matter FIRST - at least, when looking for someone to mate with. You have to narrow down who you want to get to know better somehow, and the most practical, most efficient way is to go by looks and attraction.

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    • I meant guilty of worrying about how I look.
      My current and first boyfriend is not the most attractive person in the world, but I had an attraction to him due to his personality. I looked at what he looked like after I found out what type of person he was.

    • That's pretty rare, and pretty hard to do, and like I said, less efficient.
      Of course, you're a girl, so the guy is supposed to approach you, so you don't have to worry about efficiency.
      Your boyfriend probably spent lots of time looking for other girls, and eventually arrived at you, and you took him in.

    • Well, how we met was basically on a vacation trip and I hung out with his family.

  • If you're guilty of this, then why don't you ask this to yourself?

    I can promise you the value will be way higher than any answer you will EVER get from another person.

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  • There's a reason for why there's physical attraction, it's something in our bodies/minds/whatever that makes us feel attracted to someone. That feeling when you see a pretty face or a hot body is something natural in most of the people.
    But, I do believe it's not the main thing people should be focusing on, but it's still important, you don't wanna wake up next to someone that doesn't bring that feeling that other people do.

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    • True.
      Though with my boyfriend, he might not be the most handsome guy out there, neither am I, but whenever I wake up to see him in the morning. I can't help but smile due to his great personality.

    • Your partner doesn't have to be the most attractive person in the world, but you do feel some physical attraction too him no?

    • I do feel a physical attraction to him.

  • physical attraction is a key ingredient as well. its a major component for a relationship to work.

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    • True, but I believe that you could have a pretty face, but have an ugly attitude. I would rather be with someone with a great personality and about average appearance.

    • people are different. that's what you would do and the next person could prefer the complete opposite. look at the anon answers, she said she is too shallow she only cares for looks. set example. this is just your opinion vs others.

    • Understood.

      It's great to live in a world where everyone has a different way of thinking, minus a few.

  • Because nature.

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  • Cause I don't want to look at someone I don't find attractive for the rest of my life?

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  • personally i care more about looks, since i'm not seeking for a gf

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  • My two ex girlfriends were cute in their own way and I'm not high maintenance on looks
    there is girls ( women) I've been attracted to and their personality scared me away from them

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  • That's how society is. For males, if we don't have the looks, money, power, and fame compensate for that. For females, not so much. It's either look great or not. Typically if your not looking good on the outside, then they aren't going to explore the inside. Think of it as a dinner entree. If it looks or smells disgusting are you going to eat it?

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  • Because physical attraction is just as important to assess sexual and genetic compatibility.

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  • Well that's just human nature. Subjective physical attraction is significant in a romantic/sexual relationship
    relarionship.

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  • well the other things you mentioned are obivously very important too... but i guess everybody wants to be with the nicest looking person, he can find with an appropriate character. it´s probably largely biological reasons.

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    • Understood. I also believe it's because the woman internally decides who she wants to pass down the dominant genes onto the next generation.
      I heard somewhere that having five fingers is a recessive trait in humans as suppose to having six is a dominant trait.

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    • ja there are some which are like dead limbs but some are truly funktional. this is amazing.

  • DESPITE WHAT MOST LIKE TO SAY ABOUT SHALLOWNESS, THE INNER OFTEN MANIFESTS INTO THE OUTER. FOR EXAMPLE, FAT people ARE SEEN AS LAZY AND NEGLIGENT. THERE'S TRUTH IN THIS CONSIDERING BEING FAT IS IN FACT UNHEALTHY... IT HAPPENS OVER YEARS OF NOT CARING OR INTERFERING. YOU CAN ALSO SEE HOW A PERSON LIVED HIS/HER LIFE BY THEIR EYES... AND SO MANY OTHER THINGS. WOMEN WITH CURVES ARE KNOWN TO BE LESS SICK THROUGHOUT THEIR LIVES... ITS NOT SKIN DEEP BUT DEEP. oops here's my cap lock.

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  • It's just the initial part of the equation. It's not a deciding factor at all. There are many factors that contribute towards attraction for both females and males linked to our ancestral biology.

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  • Because you don't want to end up with a dragon on your bed.

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    • Actually I wouldn't mind if I found a living dragon.
      Also I've never met a person with that type of appearance.

  • We are not living in spiritual words, and anymore most of people have been forgetting about personality and spiritual values that people have.

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  • Science will answer that for you. You can look that up in Google.

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  • Physical looks is related to good genetic material. Good genetic material makes better babies.

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    • In appearance wise or in intelligent structure?

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    • Alright. I see what you are saying. The physical attraction to another individual.

    • Yeah when someone feels chemistry (which is actually a thing that involves hormones) it's your body saying "WE WOULD MAKE GREAT HEALTHY BABIES!!!"

  • Would you rather use a clean toilet or one covered in shit?

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    • A clean one and if someone honestly shits all over a toilet, it might be time for them to go back and learn how to use a toilet correctly.

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    • Well, they both don't look good, do they?

    • But with the toilet, you can easily clean it up and it will still be a normal looking toilet. As to a human, you are not able to change their physical appearance, unless they have a ton of money to do so.

  • Your maintenance is the immediate show of how much you care about yourself

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  • Probably because of our animal instincts of which one is our sex drive that doesn't really care about personality but about whether our partner is physically 'fit' enough.

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  • It's just biology.

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    • True, though with biology there is always the recessive trait that has the tendency to make an appearance whenever introduced to the same trait as its own.

What Girls Said 4

  • a lot of attractiveness IS based on personality and attitude, but there still has to be some level of physical attraction. It's just how we're wired.

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    • Understood.
      I know I was seeing this one guy who just had an ugly attitude and personality and it just made him physically unattractive to me.

    • oh totally, I've been there too. I've also been with a guy who was pretty average looking but he had a big heart and was the sweetest guy, and it made him more attractive!

  • Because of a little friend I call natural selection and breeding. The truth is, most of us are unintentionally trying to bread a better offspring. So just like a lion wants to have a hale lions whose big and strong is girls want a tall buff guy. Just like guys want a girl with nice hair horses want a female with a nice main. We're just trying to breed our offspring with traits we find desirable

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  • Yeah its a lot about how you look but If I see a hot guy and then I start to get to know him and he's a douche bag I start to loose interest... When you see someone attractive my first instinct is dude he's hot I want to talk to him lol on the other hand if I see a guy not so cute bad hygiene im like eww I don't even want to know what your personality is like..

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  • I'm too shallow to care about anything other than looks.

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    • And that's perfectly fine. Your preference on the individual.

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