So basically, I'm going to be in highschool soon, and I have only ever had one serious relationship (which I'm too embarassed to say how long it lasted, since it was very short). It was a big messy love triangle including my friend. In the end, he choose her over me. I totally fine with it. One thing I noticed is that he gets erections just by being with her. When we were dating, he never got any. After we broke up, I asked his friend about it and his friend said, he was only dating me so I wouldn't feel let down, he didn't actually think I was pretty. I'm a black girl and constanly, I've been told I'm not pretty enough, so when I was with him (he is white), I actually started gaining confidence. My friend, is white and I can't help but think maybe race had something to do with it. I just want to know if a guy can truly find a black woman attractive. I'm not at all like the sterotype and I think i'm interesting. I'm not so worried that he left me because he didn't like my personality, I think it was because of how I look. I'm not saying all qhite males think like that, but I'm getting discouraged. I honestly, myself have no race preference, but even black guys whom I confess my attraction to say they only date light-skinned black girls, or something else. When I tell people I don't have any preference whatso ever, I get a response like, "Your lying so you don't sound ignorant" or "That's crazy". I just want to know what other people think. Sorry for grammer, typed this late at night.
Most Helpful Guy
In a perfect world, people would use their preferences as a more of a guideline rather than an end all be all checklist.
Some white dudes are open to interracial dating and some aren't. This can be due to cultural reasons, parental pressures, specific preferences, etc.
As long as they have decency to gently reject you if you ever showed interest, then it's fine. But if they're gonna be asses about it, then feeling will be hurt.
So yes race does play a factor, but not for everyone.
But hey it's not just white people who have racial preferences.
Lots of East Asians only date other East Asians or whites.
Lots of Indians only date/marry other Indians or sometimes whites.
Some black girls will only date white, hispaninic, and mixed dudes.
Some black guys have a specific preference for light skin girls thus reducing their dating pool to Latinas, whites and mixed girls.
So this preference thing is integrated throughout the world.1