Does this make me less attractive?

I'm 14 and I have anorexia, I'm trying to stop self harming, I have anxiety and depression and I get beat up almost everyday at school just for being weird, I'm small for my age so I don't have the nerve to stand up for myself, sometimes my best friend stands up for me but they aren't always around... I'm not really looking for a boyfriend but does this make me seem less attractive... or too weird... Does this just make me seem like I'm not worth anyone's time?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, it does. Humans are naturally attracted to healthy people. You clearly aren't healthy mentally and thus makes you unattractive.

    Generally speaking your best bet would be to slowly working on why you are anorexic and self-harming. The anorexia and self-harm is a symptom of deeper-lying issues and you certainly will have to confront and work them out earlier or later.

    Anorexia and self-harm is often linked to a disliking for yourself as well as a self-punishment by not allowing yourself any pleasure (the pleasure of eating in this case, but chances are you might also not have any sex-drive) as well as the actaul punishment of the self-harm. Work those things out, start liking yourself and the drive for anorexia and self-harm will decrease by itself as a result.

    Also try alternatives of self-harm if you can't keep yourself from it. There are ways to release that drive without doing permanent damage (=scars). Google is your friend here.

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What Guys Said 14

  • I think some people will have a hard time to understand and connect with you. Not everyone experience the hard times you do. Try to focus more on yourself and find your way back to the happy and healthy you. And from there other people will be able to interact with you easier.

    You are not "weird" but probably different than many simply because you have a hard time. People often make fun of things they don't understand, and I think many can have trouble understanding you and the troubles you are going through.

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  • I can feel your pain. Teenagers are horrible monsters. One problem at a time. Before you even think of maybe having a boyfriend, you should first start by trying to fix the anorexia problem. No matter how slim you get, if your view of yourself is distorted, it doesn't matter how much weight you lose, you'll always find yourself ugly. The hate that you have for yourself is was is the most ugly. If you can learn to love yourself and get to a safe weight, your self-esteem will go up and people will respect you more. Then, boys they will start getting interested in you. Meanwhile, please, talk to your parents, teachers or people you trust. Seek help. Do not stay alone with your problems, otherwise you will only spiral downward. Good luck !

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  • We are your friends here. We can't stand up against these bullies foryou, but we will do whatever we can to help.

    Nothing you are and nothing you do will detract from you being attractive. You are worth everyone's time and attention, mine certainly! Please understand that self harming will not achieve anything. It honestly won't make you feel any better long term.
    You need to confide in adults around you. Parents, teachers etc. You need support that we here just can't offer. We would if we could! I take it you are in USA. In UK, there are serious laws against bullying. But even here, they only work with an adult who is prepared to kick arse seriously with the school and other agencies.

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  • You honestly don't know the time or place where you will meet right guy for you - Hang in there and keep the faith.

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  • Lyndsielee666-Get some help girl. If you weird so what? The reason people don't like weird people is because we're smart. I'd take some self defense courses and kick those who bully you in the ass. I was bullied in junior until I fought back, I broke this guy's nose, haw, three ribs and kick him in his genitals and he that made him sterile. I too was 14. Please get some help. Depression is no joke and it can get worse.

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    • I know, I'm on medication and I've been to the the hospital for it, I've also attempted suicide 7 times

    • good for you. tag me next time gramps.
      You don't know the girl so how are you going to say she's weird.

  • You're not in a good place for a relationship. That doesn't mean you're not worth people's time, you just need to work out personal issues before you can be in a healthy relationship.

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  • If anything, It makes you more attractive.

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    • How exactly?

    • It just would, You would be the type of person i would like to date, Someone who i could help and work on that stuff with ya know?

  • Yes it's very unattractive, but that is just one of your problems, You need counseling and psychotherapy before you keep harming yourself physically and mentally.

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  • Don't say that uwu. I want to let you know that even though "real" life can be really awful you can always count on the people in here to talk or feel better sharing your problems. Since I was 10 I've been bullied and my physical looks aren't attracting to girls neither so basically I have a glimpse of how you might feel. If you ever need someone to hear you I'm here if you ever wanna talk.

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  • Yep definitely.

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  • How could I say u r attractive or not with out any picture

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  • These things don't make you seem that way at all! It sounds like things are pretty tough though...

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  • You are totally worth everybody's time, when you get through this you will be amazing I am sure

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  • Just sounds like too much to handle. We should compliment your life, not be it

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    • complement, i mean. Haha, I often forget which one it is

What Girls Said 5

  • i've had anorexia since i was nine, don't worry about what anyone else thinks until you;re recovering. Carry pepper spray, if anyone fucks with you use it. i've been tiny my whole life but no one fucked with me because i have horrible resting bitch face,
    you'll find someone who will help you and who will love you no matter what you're going through, and they'll want to see you get better.
    I see nothing weird about you. Everyone has their own problems.

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  • I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's them who become unattractive; bullying is sick

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  • Get yourself help.

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    • I did/have, I see a counselor, I've been to the psychiatric hospital, and I'm on medication

    • Great! Good luck with everything girl.

  • Honestly I have a friend in a similar situation and it was well known that she had scars and she was thin and once she became more stable guys were really into her. She's actually really happy now and although she is still thin she gained some weight and is dealing with her anorexia and she doesn't self harm at all. It does get better. And, as for the attractive to men part, guys like being able to play the role of the strong savior. :)

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  • I have often felt that same way throughout my life, but find my way out of it. I've also struggled with anorexia and anxiety. I wish you all the best. You are completely worth people's time.

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