How do I get over being ugly?

First of all I dont care or want "youre not ugly answers" I have a serious issues which doesn't even let me leave my house. I am really ugly and I get bullied for it a lot yes even at my age. I get put down, ridiculised and I have serious anxiety even for going to work. I work out and try to keep nicely dressed but to be honest I'm always gonna be ugly no matter what I do.

What bothers me is that I have attempted suicide just because I have looked in the mirror before and didn't like myself the way I look. I'm always going to be alone due to my looks (yes for the last god damn time looks matter to women too I will ignore all "confidence is sexy" comments) Yes I am on fucking medicine now dont flag my question as suicidal, jesus why are people so stupid and can't read between the lines

I have been going to theraphy and I sometimes skip the sessions because I don't like other people looking at me even going to work for eight hours is pushing it for me but I do it cause well bills.

What can I do to not feel so badly about being hideous?

Updates:
Stop calling me average its the nice way to say ugly geeze making me feel worse -.-

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Google hideous people... do you look like them? No Okay next step: Google ugly men... Do you look like them? No
    If you feel so ugly why put the effort into working out, dressing nicely and going to get your lip pierced? Seems that sometimes you don't see yourself that way. Think about what is different in those moments. If therapy isn't helping then I really don't know what to tell you. Your aren't ugly even if you don't want to hear that. You need to get past that thought because you are not a child anymore that has to listen to bullies and you have other qualities that make you a good person.

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    • I work out and dress nicely to try and look presentable... and if I dont do that I feel helpless if I'm working out at least I can have the false hope of maybe being somewhat attractive and yeah i dont look like those deformed people I will see on google. I look like run of the mill ugly average joe which is horrible

Most Helpful Guy

  • What surprises me is that you've put your picture in your profile. Kinda ballsy from someone who finds himself so ugly... Unless it's not your face?

    Ok let's say your hideous. So what? What are you gonna do about it? Maybe you should just stop worrying about it. Often, the anticipation of something bad is worse than the bad thing itself. Like the fear you feel before jumping off the plane versus the feeling you get going down. It's much worse before... (I imagine, I am just making a point). What if you made peace with the fact you are the single most ugly person on the planet? There is nothing you can change to your face, so you may as well learn to live a semi normal life with it no? Even if people laugh at you everywhere you go, it's still better than living your life inside your house and achieve nothing no? What's the worst thing that people can do to you? I am sure none of them even came close to wanting to kill you. Yet, you tried to kill yourself. What you are doing to yourself is much worse than what they are doing to you ! Also, maybe there are some assholes out there, but not everybody gives a shit how ugly you are. They could talk to a human sized cockroach without a problem since they're not trying to have sex with it. Also, most people don't know you and you are not even important enough for them to consider how you look. Don't overestimate yourself in their eyes and think it even matters to those people.

    Ok, you're ugly... so what? Where do you go from there?

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    • Well my family my friends and everyone tells me the same and whats normal about being ugly as hell and being alone for the rest of your life and not having kids? what kinda life is that? seriously

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    • see thats exactly the life I DONT want O. o

    • So remind me why the hell you asked that question? Cause you seem to use this only as a way to complain. I wanted to help you, but you look like the kind of guy who prefers to be miserable rather than trying to be happy... Hey, if hating yourself a little more is the only joy you get in a day, indulge my friend...

What Girls Said 6

  • Dude... seriously? You are NOT ugly. What kind of mirror are you using? I don't know how people are in Puerto Rico, but come to America and you will have tons of options.

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    • Oh! And, put a smile on your face! Smiling is very attractive.

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    • yeah but most people have no clue about body language and suchsoo its highly unlikely

    • It's more like they have no interest in paying close enough attention. That's why people have so many issues and questions.

  • Why you dont just ignore those jerks?
    When I was in high school, there was a guy that had a car crash with his parents when he was a little boy. And his face was really disfigured (I think he would rather be ugly than disfigured) but he still had girlfriends, friends.
    He's the kind of guy joking all the time, being very friendly and positive to others, I don't know where he got his strength but probably from the fact that he been close to death at one time so he was grateful.

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  • How about trying your style? :) I mean you should never change who you are! But if it is upsetting you, try different styles! Maybe grown your hair or dye it? More or lessen your piercings? And try and hold some confidence when you leave the house! You have no idea how much more attractive someone looks if they walk with their head high! It really works!! Good luck buddy :) you don't deserve go be bullied, I actually think you look cute :/

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  • You honestly aren't anywhere NEAR ugly. If people think you're ugly, they've obviously got sight issues. You're very good looking. :)

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    • The problem is in his head. Maybe he has body dysmorphic disorder coupled with paranoia or something. He maybe misinterpreting people's comments as being insults. His mind twists everything to make him hear what he "wants" to hear. I don't know, it's only my opinion and is not worth much...

    • I dso not have body dysmorphia or paranoia and yes people blatantly tell me " You are ugly"

  • Love yourself, get laid, go for a nature walk, drink ice tea, buy a bmw

    Make yourself feel good in general

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    • Getting laid is not and option with my looks... and a BMW I wish

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    • It really is, I've seen here people tell ugly people they are average just to make them feel better, not be a dick i say this purely objectively

    • Sometimes thats true and sometimes it isn't
      If I think someones ugly I dont bother to comment tbh xD

  • you can't change it, so just accept it.

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What Guys Said 10

  • I actually understand; I was just like you once. I was bitter because it seemed all the girls were (a) already taken, (b) evil bitches, (c) lesbians (it was university in the San Francisco area), (d) would reject me anyway if I tried, (e) wouldn't date outside their ethnic group--until I discovered that many would!

    So buck up. What else to do:

    1. If you want to lose your virginity, try an older "Cougar" divorcee, who wants to "get her groove back". She might just be the one to break you in. Your initial lack of game in such a situation will be non-threatening, and therefore downright appealing, to an older divorcee. And by interactions of this nature, you will get "game". And then, by the time you are the age of the Cougars yourself, you may even be trolling for younger babes! Or you may have already found someone and settled in. The point is, you never know until you actually try.

    2. Try putting out a personals ad online. You can meet people from the privacy of your home, then call them up, then meet. If it does not work out, no bad repercussions, unlike school or work. Avoid public situations where asking them out leads to humiliation and failure. Avoid noisy dance clubs where you can't actually talk to them. Like me, I am betting you cannot dance without looking foolish, and slam dancing in the mosh pits does not count (am I revealing my age here? So be it).

    3. Pour yourself into school / work. Make more money and/or build up skills to make more money. Or if you find an academic interest that excites you, go for it. This is always good.

    4. Exercise. You are already doing this, but you say you have no results? Even if utterly non-sporting, it is good just to hike, bike, or lift weights. Don't compete against anyone--that will make you feel worse--just compete against yourself.

    5. Look into antidepressant meds. They can really help in some cases.

    6. Done enough of #3 and #4? Then develop an interest that takes you someplace you haven't been. Ever skied down a mountain? Scuba dived under the water? Backpacked or camped out in pretty places to get away from it all for a few days or even weeks? There is more to life than just "Birth, School, Work, Death" as the song goes...

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    • Well I suck at life so even with my bachelors I can't leave my mcdonalds job I tried starting to business and failed. I just suck at life

    • The economy does suck right now, especially in PR. Hang in there.

  • To be honest dude, *No homo here*, I actually think you look quite good, I mean, You have very nice facial structure and stuff.

    But, In my opinion, You could look x10 times better without the lip thing and maybe put your hair up too :) (Though thats your choice not myn),

    Seriously though dude, You're bein way to fuckin hard on yourself, You look good haha.

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  • I was expecting there to be some hideous moster in the profile pic... but dude... your not even ugly AT ALL 😑. Your an average, normal looking dude. I guarentee you that nobody is staring at you wherever you go - and if they are, its probably cuz of the double lip piercings, not because your ugly (nothing against lip piercings, but they do grab people's attentions).

    And no, average is NOT the same as ugly. Ugly is when you are repusled at the sight of someone. Average is when they look, well... average. Nothing significantly good, but nothing significantly bad.

    And honestly, if you are a nice guy, who cares for a girl; average is usually enough.

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    • average is the nice way to say ugly and piercings here are normal so I dont particulary stick out at all

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    • That won't give me a better life and I know for a fact that everyone here is lying for political correctness sake :) but thanks

    • Whatever dude. Its hopeless arguing with you. All i can say is keep going to the therapist and keeping taking those meds. You really need it.

  • you are probably better than me tbh lol but i am not depressed, for one beauty is usually an insecurity for women and to add salt to their wounds, esp in india i have seen several women who have their face burnt forever due to acid attacks (sadly that happens a lot esp in the patriarchal societies). Also, there are people who have disorders and all and they can do nothing about it. Then there are people who have remained very short and they are left to deal with it. Basically, there is a lot to complain about but there is much more to be thankful for.

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    • plus you are 27 or thats what your profile, do looks even matter to women at your age group?

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    • u know what, after this conversation, i will say you are indeed ugly and fucked coz u ain't getting girls

    • yeah I said this myself at the start

  • There's not anything we can do to be honest it's a self battle on that one. but you look pretty good dude there's nothing to worry about

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  • have you tried dating sites? you'll find interested girls there. this i bet you on it, what do you think?

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  • Maybe you were ugly when you were a kid, but it looks like you've grown out of it. You have a defined enough face to do some modelling I'd say.

    It's actually kind of funny considering how you described your childhood. Congrats, fate smiles on you.

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  • Have you ever tried a new hairstyle before?
    Just asking becuse when i look at a lot of girls with a short hairstyle (by that i mean girls who have mohawks for ex) and whenever i see them in longer hair then it makes them look 10 times more beautiful. I think this applies to males aswell. Just find out what kind of hairstyle girls find you most attractive in or just change to something that makes you feel better about youself. By the way beauty is subjective if you are considered decent so maybe you should try to think that:I´m not beautiful in everyones eyes but i´m beautiful to some girls. There is someone out there for you and before you start doubting me let me remind you that here are 7 billion people on this planet (in your age group i´m guessing 4,3 billion) and that would mean you have 4,3 billion chances of finding a girl so please try to think about what i said to you before rejecting my words.

    I´m not beautiful either. I suffer from a depression and i´m constantly comparing myself to other guys. I´ve only been called cute 2 times when i´ve talked to girls on kik. Have never had a girlfriend before. I even consider surgery to change my jaw and geting thicker, more symmetrical eyebrows. I´m afriad off showing girls how i look when talking to them on kik. BUT i´m still trying not becuse i find it easy to, not becuse of the mean comments i get about my apperance. The reason i´m TRYING is becuse i´ve lealized that if i can´t accept myself then i will remain broken for the rest of my life, asking myself questions when i´m in the age of 63. Why couldn´t i have a girlfriend. I don´t want this kind of future and i´m sure you don´t want it either so i´m going to tell you this only once:Average means some people will love your face while other won´t. The key is to find those people who will love your apperance and forget about those who don´t. You do that simply by geting out and being social. As is see it your options are the following:
    1 Accept that you aren´t every girls malemodel and keep think that:There are at least a couple of girls who will love me.
    2Ask what kind of feature girls see as a turn off in you and get surgery to correct it. Learn what kind of feature are seen as beautiful and try to understand what you are lacking. Make your features more visible and most importantly, don´t overdo it.
    3Lower your standards and if that doesn´t work then just accept the fact that you will be single. Spend your time on doing things you enjoy so that you won´t have to think about it

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  • First off you're average, not ugly. Secondly you accept you're appearance isn't what you'd consider ideal and just do yaw 'tang in life, if you're worrying about not being able to find a girlfriend you shouldn't be.. I've seen guys who are actually ugly with girls, every other person is a girl so the odds are on your side.

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    • average is the same as ugly lol

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    • Yeah, you're probably fucked. lol

    • I've stated this myself before

  • we are all ugly in a sense. find Christ and you will find beauty from the inside. true beauty comes from the inside... .

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    • yeah yeah take your ridiculously accient christian bs off my post please

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    • you can leave now

    • i will. but i'm sure you will think it deep in your heart. what makes you ugly. is it physical? it's for you to decide... . adios.

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