Do I have to trim/shave my hair/beard to be more successful in the dating world?

I've been an online dating user for about a 3 weeks now and it's been pretty slow... I've had about a dozen conversation that went nowhere and another dozen one time replies (where they respond only once)... That might sound pretty good to some guys but I've probably messaged around a 100 women or so.

I have rearranged my bio/about me a few times now and I never say just "hi" "hey" or "how are you" (I ask a question based off of their profile or say something random) now I feel like maybe my look isn't that appealing either... So what do you think? Be brutally honest would you be interested or not?

Do I have to trim/shave my hair/beard to be more successful in the dating world?



  • No, stay you
    62% (21)57% (17)59% (38)Vote
  • Trim your hair
    12% (4)17% (5)14% (9)Vote
  • Trim your beard
    9% (3)0% (0)5% (3)Vote
  • Cut both
    12% (4)17% (5)14% (9)Vote
  • Other... Explain...
    5% (2)9% (3)8% (5)Vote
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I'm getting really annoyed with the lack of matches and such on these sites... Maybe I need to cut my hair shorter and ditch the facial hair (just have it as stubble).
I think I might dial back the beard to full on stubble... What do you people think?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • No you don't! Stay true to yourself and there are plenty of girls who like beards.
    I'm personally not too fond of beards but it looks good on you!
    Hang in there, the right girl will come into your life soon enough!

    Maybe try messaging a cute girl but the type you typically wouldn't go for. If you prefer brunettes try blondes, if prefer white girls go for women of color, if you prefer younger girls try a bit older, etc.

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    • I've been pretty much swinging for the fences... Meaning I've messaged everything you said (blonde/brunette, white/tanned, younger/older and much more).

      The dating world is incredibly shallow... Also I met the right girl last year she said we were like soulmate was by my side for a moment than she changed her mind & destroyed my confidence (spoke down to me after I caught her with someone else and plenty of other wonderful things were said/done).

      So yeah my attitude towards that has changed.

    • Yeah dating can be very difficult and frustrating for some people, that's why I don't do it lol. I'm not equipped to handle the dating world.

      Maybe online dating isn't for you. People online are much much more picky than in person. If you like music why not hang out with other music lovers and musicians and meet girls tht way?

    • Exactly, I should be meeting people in person instead of trying to force chemistry and a spark online.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You beard Looks fine to me - From the stories I hear about dating sites your experience sounds normal for a guy so unless you are a Greek God you will struggle a bit.

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What Girls Said 13

  • No, there will be some females who don't like the bearded look and some that love it, just depends the person!

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  • I think you are attractive, girls love messy hair, and your beard is nice, you look good with some hair going backwards.

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  • When I was reading I got scared, but it looks like you keep your beard pretty well maintained. They probably thing you're fake because you're actually decent looking.

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  • Um no you just need to grow an actual beats not goatee or whatever. It isn't 1995. Grow a beard or shave it off. That shot's not cool.

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    • Of and no neck beards.

    • Show All
    • Those are 3 of the pics I chose... I hate taking photos because I always think to myself "you look weird".

      Anyway where do they rate in the casual vs "winning" description you have?

    • Wait, what do you look like?

  • You look very nice and shouldn't change for someone else let alone someone you don't even know yet! But to answer your question: yes I prefer men without a beard and/or long hear.
    Oh and bonuspoints for actually including a picture of you smiling, much better than everyone just looking neutral or grim :)

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  • stay as you are

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  • Just trim your hair a little bit to keep it neat

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  • No I don't think cause it suit you

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  • No you're handsome as you are

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  • You look good :3

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  • dude your fine but dont online date , go out and find a girl you dont need the internet, best of luck on your journey on finding the one lol

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  • Your facial hair is fine. It works for you. What I don't really care for is the hair and the hats. I prefer shorter hair, and I have never liked seeing or wearing hats. However, you ARE attractive, and you look good with facial hair. You should keep the beard. Some people like it and some don't.

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  • Stay you. Id give you a 7/10, above average.
    On a side note you also remind me of Hozier...

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What Guys Said 6

  • no stay you, you have the hipster look. hipster doesn't look right without the beard

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  • I'd say TRY seeing how you look with a cleaner haircut. Because I had bangs+long hair for ~6 years, then I accidentally cut it short, and now I think I look a lot better and it's just a standard cut.

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    • I've been considering it for more than just aesthetic reasons... It would be easier to maintain and no more bad hair days also wind is annoying. God I sound so gay talking about this lol.

  • Grow the beard

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  • forget online dating until and unless ur ridiculously good looking

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  • Find a lady that likes you for who you are and how you look.

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    • I'm giving up on that idea (feels like a fantasy now) after getting the fuck around by a couple girls last year... I feel like Men are better off having options so you're not dependent on 1 girl for sexual satisfaction - yeah I know there's more to a relationship than that but most of these girls don't want bfs they just want different guys they can sleep with for a bit... So why can't I do the same as a man? And what do I have to do in order live like that?

      I wish it wasn't true but no one is trustworthy or worth it so fuck it - why should I be sexually starved because I'm not in a relationship.

  • get a cleaner cut

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