I am a highschool kid and these girls in my class make fun of me calling me fat ass. I am self conscious about my weight and I am actually curvy but these girls are starting to be real rude towards me I don't know how to handle this and now when I walk the halls I feel more self conscious than ever. Should I ignore them or should I take a stand because now these girls have a fair amount of people calling me fat ass and whore stuff like that. I want it to stop but I am too scared of what they'll do to me. Can you guys help me out?
Most Helpful Guy
You need to take a stand.
I dealt with this bullshit, and trust me girl, you don't have to.
Here is exactly what you do, in this order.
Tell them to stop. "Stop talking to me like that. You are bullying me, and if it continues I will take it to the next level." The'll say Oooo, whatya gonna dooo?, you say "I'll go to the vice principal and inform him of your behavior, then if he/she doesn't do anything about it, I'll will.
The next level: Tell a school counselor/ vice principal and your parents (parents should be on your side with this). "Mandy and Bianca have been speaking to me inappropriately. They've been ganging up on me verbally and bullying me in general and I would like you to take steps insure it doesn't happen anymore. If you can't handle this problem I will have to take measures to protect myself up to and including physical altercations." This makes you untouchable if you have to take matters into your own hands, but don't get physical until the staff warns the bullies, and they've continued to do so, report the second offence to the staff again, and inform them that you won't be tolerating another insolent. The girls will get a second warning, likely in the form of a suspension at this point. If it happens again, go immediately to step three.
Things usually don't get this far these days. But if it does you need to be prepared to see this all the way through. You didn't start this, but now you have to finish it.
Step three is important because if you asking for it to stop, and the school authorities have asked for it to stop, and it doesn't stop YOU WILL HAVE TO FIGHT THEM. This is important because bullies generally understand only this particular form of communication. (or maybe its just that way with boys, but not in my experience) If it doesn't stop there are a few things to remember when confronting a bully. 1. Confront the leader first, confront them in front of people, but while they are away from their fellow bullies. They'll have no support and be forced to fight 1vs1. 2. During the confrontation you have to say this: "I've asked you to stop, you've been asked by the principal to stop, you've even been suspended and you haven't stopped. I'm asking you one last time, and I'm not asking you to be my friend, I'm merely asking you to leave me be. Its come to a fight, and I'm going to shut you up one way or another, which do you chose?" And either you'll have to fight your you won't.1
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Most Helpful Girl
Confidence is the best deterrent.
I used to feel really insecure about my body and sometimes still do. People would make fun of me or whisper. I started dressing in what made me feel good. Confidence followed. People respect that. In fact I've been told that one of my best qualities is being "unapologetically me"
Self love is a constant journey but it does get easier.1
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