How to get over my insecurities?

So I'm a 17yo girl and probably like many other teens I have issues regarding my appereance. I'm pretty short but I don't see that as I problem. In the upper part of my body I'm pretty skinny and I also have medium boobs. however the problem starts in the lower part. I have a pretty big ass, however it also looks good as I have received compliments regarding it. But I feel like my thighs are huge. I know they are not that big but compared to all my friends they seem really big. My bff is tall and skinny and she is a model and the other one is short but also skinny. I have tried losing weigh but I can't seem to be able to do it. And my problem starts with the need of confirmation. I have never had a boyfriend and only 2-3guys that have ever kind of liked me. And I know I may be superficial but I'm outgoing and nice so I think that the problem starts with my appereance. That is why I also started to dislike my face. I have a round face, pretty plump lips brown eyes and I wear glasses. I have never really been told I was ugly but all the girl people say are pretty are the total opposite of me. In addition when I laugh I consider myself really ugly and that is why I try to stay serious most of the time. I lnow that it may be a pretty superficial problem but I am starting to feel worse and worse.
what do you think i could do to like myself more? thanks


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Firstly, don't stay serious. Laugh! Smile! A laugh and a smile are infectious, and makes you attractive. Attractive ladies get attention. Attention boosts your confidence.

    Secondly, you don't sound ugly at all. If you want to lose wieght, it isn't difficult. It just needs a small change in eating habits. Diets fail because they are unsustainable. They don't work long term. Simple changes do work, because you don't notice them. It may be just 1lb or 1/2 kilo each week, but it soon adds up! I'm 40lbs down over an 18 month period, back to what I should be.

    If you need help losing weight, I'll talk you through it here.

    Take it from me, you do sound JUST FINE!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's normal to be insecure about your looks, I am too. No matter how good you look there will always be something you're not happy with but you know what? Other people usually never notice those things anyway. From what you described, you don't sound ugly at all. Just take care of yourself, eat healthy and exercise and you'll be the best version of yourself (appearance wise). Knowing that your fit and healthy usually boosts your confidence and trust me, confidence is attractive. That's probably what you're lacking. Guys notice that you're insecure and that could be the reason they're not showing interest.

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What Guys Said 12

  • You sound like my Daughter... You are probably a very lovely young Lady.

    First of all, chin up. Be the Lady you were meant to be. And if a Man doesn't like you, forget him, move on to the next one who does.

    I am going to reveal myself here, but Almighty God gave you as a gift to us, Men. And Men, rightly, should appreciate that Gift, because it is a gift.

    Secondly, understand that for every woman walking around on this Planet, there is a Man looking for you.

    You just haven't found him yet.

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  • willing to post a photo so we can judge ourselves? I just don't buy it is appearance alone. At this age, it seems normal to me to not have had a boyfriend, although I know a lot of girls are way farther ahead. People are superficial, boys insecure, girls insecure.
    To like yourself more: read the book change your life in 7 days... has some exercises in it to help. Look up other role models who were proportioned like you and see their success.
    The main girl I'm attracted to is shaped like you.

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  • Well, this may sound like I'm telling you to act like a crazy person, but I've always found that it helps to tell yourself that you're (whatever you you want more confidence in.) I used to be bullied in high school for being an idiot (even though I'm nowhere near stupid) so I started telling myself that I'm not stupid, but smart. I promise you that it will help at least a little, if not a lot.

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  • The thighs work with the nice ass I bet. Stop worrying, many many guys love a nice ass.

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  • You pretty much opened the question talking about how good you look...

    What's the problem?

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  • most of the stick figure girls in fashion are picked by gay men and women not heterosexual men. Dont hold them up as the standard that straight men are looking for

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  • insecurities are things that only we care about... actually people doesn't pay too much attention to anything! In my personal case, I pay more attention to the personality of people than their body... don't be ashamed of your body! it is the best tool you have, it allows you to live your life! I was caught one doing nude-camping next to a river... after that, no more complexes! lol!!

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  • Probably nothing. Not gonna lie to ya. It's normal to not like everything about yourself and it doesn't sound like you're mentally ill about it.

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  • Start lifting. Srs.

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  • whats wrong with big thighs? thats actually sexy.

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  • take deep breth and jump over them

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  • Hey, wait until you are 18 and maybe talk to me ;)

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What Girls Said 2

  • This is a problem I had through my teenage years, and truth be told- I was wasting me time. Just be happy, be comfortable, and be you. Don't put so much stress on how many guys like you because in the end how many have to like you? 1. Your husband. And do you want him to love you because of your looks? Nope. :) But I understand completely how you're feeling and its just part of being female. Especially at 17. Do your best not to focus on it.

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  • lifes to short for insecurities, be yourself and enjoy life xx

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