Dating App Troubles. Do I look that bad?

Dating App Troubles. Do I look that bad?

Should I be concerned that I'm not getting any more matches on stuff like Tinder, OKC, and Hot or Not? I would say I'm pretty active, checking at least once a day/doing my daily rounds with swiping. No matter how many swipes I do a day it seems like I'm not getting any more matches. It's really discouraging me, even though I'm neither bad nor particularly good looking. I have decent pictures... Should I give up on the dating scene now before I have some heartbreaking revelation?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You're a handsome young man, I'd say talk to girls in person so that way they have a better idea of your personality as they can listen to the influxes in your voice. Also it seems as though most people use those apps for sleeping around, so unless you're a hot chick I don't think you'd have much luck. Meet girls in real life. The experience would be much better plus you're more likely to develop a meaningful and lasting relationship.

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    • 3mo

      I just don't find the whole social part so easy, unfortunately. I think i would be viewed as weird and/or creepy if I just approached some random girl. The ones I do have a reason to talk to usually don't want to pick up their end of the conversation :/

    • 3mo

      And that's okay, listen, rejection is simply a part of life but there's nothing wrong with being rejected. Truthfully all that is needed to open up a window is to go up to a girl, introduce yourself, give her a compliment, ask her a few things about herself just to open up a conversation and then ask for her number.

      If you get her number talk to her for a while and once you guys know each other ask her on a date. Now, if you approach a girl and she isn't interested that's perfectly fine. I can't tell you the countless times I've been rejected, and while I understand it's not a nice feeling, it certainly isn't the end of the world.

      You seem like an amazingly sweet person. You've just got to put yourself out there and if anything happens, don't internalize it. There's nothing wrong with you.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Sites where average girls are treated above perfect 10s? No, it's all skewed in favour of girls, they don't message anyone first, just sort through a few hundred a day. You would have infinitely better luck per girl, asking them out irl. Obviously they won't all say yes, but unless you're famous or extremely attractive, you won't get too many matches in the sausage party apps.

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    • 3mo

      I definitely don't consider myself extremely attractive, that's for sure. I'm just not sure where to start in real life. It'd be weird to go up to a random girl and just ask her out. My fear of rejection is just too high. Besides, even if I managed the date, I don't have tbh conversation skills to chat up with somebody I don't click with. Honestly, many of my interests are so far out there that it's hard to find somebody who shares them. This isn't even accounting for the fact that I have like no money, ever... College life 🙃

    • 3mo

      Do you have a car?
      Yeah I don't ask out random girls, unless they were winking at me and giving me obvious looks haha. I've just met girls working at various stores generally.

What Girls Said 2

  • You look gorgeous

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  • Lol calm down you're looks are fine just the way they are maybe I think it's the way your pic is taken. The light is too bright on the right and there's a shadow over the eye on the left and your face is way to close up. Girls are scrolling through those apps pretty fast so they can misinterpret something about your looks. you might want to retake the pic in better lighting and a little farther away not too close up.

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    • 3mo

      Would you suggest just deleting the account and restarting? At this point I've probably gone through all of the people in the app.

    • 3mo

      Yes that might be better

What Guys Said 1

  • Too relatable! You look good man. I'd say a 7 or so. I try using these apps as well and get horrible results also. You have to be the perfect looking guy for even average looking girls to like you. I guess you could say the game was rigged from the start.

    Dating apps are dumb as hell though to be honest. This is coming from a guy also that apparently looks "good," but I have trouble with girls cause I have confidence issues. While I still need to work on this, work on not caring what girls think of you. Then you might feel more confident talking to girls.

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    • 3mo

      You get me. We must be in the same boat here. Especially the whole confidence portion. While I know it is irrational, I fear rejection. My #2 fear, right under being alone. Now that I'm going into my second year of college (so thankful I am out of the toxic environment that was high school) I occasionally get a compliment here and there. My confidence is getting better, but not fast enough.

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    • 3mo

      College is way better than high school for sure. You feel what less ostracized by your classmates. While I am not actively seeking hookups (a relationship is more satisfactory, not that I wouldn't enjoy a hookup) I just don't see myself in that situation, and I mean that in the "not by choice" way. I know people who can just look at a girl and get a date/hookup, and all I get is blank stares or dirty looks. I figure it is luck, and I'm a man of science for Pete sake. Will my day come? Maybe when I'm 70 years old.

    • 3mo

      The odds are in everyone's favor actually. Your day should come so long as you don't die soon haha. I completely get what you're saying though since I feel the exact same way. I don't pick up on signs at all that a girl likes me even if they do. When I look at a girl she'll look at me, but it's not obvious if she was flattered by me looking at her either. I have no idea man. Haha

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