What if it's a girl you're seriously dating?
Guys do you mind if your girlfriend's Facebook status says 'single'?
Is it just me or do most of the people on her who say "yes" to this poll question seem a little possessive? Why is there a sense of security in knowing that a popular social network states that you're in a relationship with someone and they with you? "If a girl is listed as single on FB she's fair game," and I assume that goes for men as well but who would think of men being fair game? It's not a popular view to see men as a prize to capture, but women are. What am I entailing? It's quite simple actually... those who say "yes" are most likely (not most definitely) one's who view the relationship as "you are mine, and I'm not sharing."
First (situation): no one posses another person. That is an idea that needs to be wiped from everyone's mind. If you feel secure just because a social network says your in a relationship then obviously you do not trust the person outright; this means that the relationship will falter anyways. On another note, even if it's official online there is a chance that the girl/guy you're in a relationship with will still be hit on. This other person whom, I hope, you really care about has their own thoughts, feelings, dreams, life, etc. You cannot control them.
Second (solution): focus on you! If you can be happy whether or not a social network states you two are in a relationship then it is because you love and trust that person (almost; there can be exceptions) unconditionally. You love that person for who they are not because being in a relationship with them and having it "official" online makes you feel more secure! The only thoughts, feelings, dreams, life, etc. you can control are your own; so, if you truly do love and trust that person then you have nothing to worry about.
To sum up: Life is an uncertainty in itself. Why trouble yourself with another worry like whether or not the person you're in a relationship with changes there to "in a relationship" or keeps it at "single"?
Most Helpful Opinions
-
For me, a status update on my Facebook page doesn't show how much I care about that person. Yes, you might feel like "shout[ing] it from the mountain tops" that you're now in a relationship; however, which makes you happier: updating your Facebook status so that everyone knows that you've been taken or just knowing that you're in a relationship with someone who makes you feel warm and happy?
Honestly, in my opinion, if you get butt hurt over the other person not changing their status then you either really need to re-evaluate your priorities or you can directly ask the person what their feelings on the matter is. Chances are, the other person will disagree with you on several things. Why get upset when you can just ask, talk about it, and come to an understanding instead? Besides, that's how good relationships work, don't they?
I don't think it should matter. If she feels comfortable telling people that she is in a relationship then so be it if not then so what. Some people don't want other people to know all their business. It has nothing to do with being embarrassed its just that sometimes when people find out that you are in a relationship they talk about you & ask you too many questions like how did yall meet? what did yall do on your dates? are yall having sex? how do your parents feel about yall together? etc. it's just too much to handle when people are all in your business.
- 397 opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
I think this goes for guys and girls- if a relationship status is blank, that's OK. If you just recently started dating, or being in a en exclusive relationship and you keep it on 'single' for a few weeks in, no biggie. If you've been with them a while, they do update their fb regularly, and it says 'single'...Yeah that's not OK. If they want to keep their relationships private, they can remove the status entirely. By staying 'single' it makes them look available to other men/women, which shouldn't be encouraged when in a relationship.
- 2.3K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
I know that it'd drive my boyfriend nuts. I'm not so sure why, but I know it'd upset me too if his were single while we were dating. Not sure why, but that's just how it is. Probably because so many people use Facebook as a way to look up their crushes and see if they're taken. If the status is "single" then they could flirt with that person. I'm very confident with the devotion in my relationship, but it'd get annoying for both of us if people kept flirting when we weren't interested.
What Girls & Guys Said
14
Opinion
35Opinion
-
Well, why do you want to keep it single in the first place? it just sounds shady to me.
It's like when a girl doesn't want to drink it. It's like she is not completely sure about you and doesn't want to let herself go.
I don't know, Facebook is a stupid thing anyway, but the fact that you want to keep it like that says a lot of stuff about the relationship.
In the worse case scenario you want to cheat, in the best case, you are embarrased of him and don't want people to know you are dating him. Either way I feel bad for the dude. -
If I've asked the girl to be my girlfriend and over the course of at least a week she hasn't changed the status to in a relationship. I'm not going to be very happy. Obviously she's hiding the relationship. As they say, if you are truly happy in your relationship and like the person you are with, you should want to shout it from the mountain tops, not hide it.
Now if it was because of some outside circumstance like a crazy ex Boyfriend or a crazy family. Then I'll be more accepting of it, but even then, that brings up other issues that would need to be addressed. -
Facebook itself is a medium for displaying information to EVERYONE.
Implying that you don't want to show whether you're dating or not to people whom it does not concern the least, obviously setting that piece of information does not actually matter.
So I personally voted no. I know I'm dating, and that should be enough.
My status is completely blank, my SO's is "single", but it's just because we don't really care about Facebook and don't visit it much anyways. Displaying every aspect of my life there is like writing a diary then showing it off to everyone - even though it is a private matter. -
My advice is not display any status. Then no drama.
However, stating whether you are single or not broadcasts to everyone your availability. People flirt via messaging, people look up their crushes and check statuses. Women KNOW this.
If you are dating for a few months and her status is 'single'... then she is inviting other people to flirt with her and it could mean she ashamed to date you.
If it is an issue of privacy then hide the status. But to actually list yourself as single is an affirmative statement rather than a neutral one. It DOES matter. It is a HUGE deal -
I don't worry about my status much and I do not expect the girl to, either. Some of the people in my network are actors and other artists, using Facebook to build their fan bases. They would keep the status as Single regardless for professional reasons.
At the other end of the scale we have people who would jitter between "in a relationship", "it's complicated" and "single" depending who won the fight that day, them or their significant other. These same type people would often post public status updates like "hungry" or "hate this traffic", or "some people are just pigs - you know who you are" and so on.
if I got engaged or married I would likely update my status to that effect, and I would expect my girl to do likewise. Anything short of that is single. Getting more granular than that feels silly - it's like next they make it possible to communicate in FB status if you got to a 2nd base or if you fed the girl 3 dinners but no sex yet? -
Yes I know it's only a website but I for one feel a little more secure if we're listed as in a relationship (or that she's anything but listed as single to be honest). As I found out from my current girlfriend, evidently one of her 'closest friends' had been trying damn hard to date her and completely gave up once we were listed as together on FB. To him that was the sign that it was legit and not really subject to change, and I feel like a lot of guys would agree with him: If a girl is listed as single on FB she's fair game.
- 3.7K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
Damn f*cking right I would.
I wouldn't want to date some girl that wants to appear single to other ppl.
I'd be furious (presuming she actually logged into FB since we've become official)!
I'd gently ask her, and if she does ANYTHING but conform to my wishes, we're done on the spot.
Cauz frankly I can't trust her telling (literally) everyone that she knows (and doesn't know) in cyberspace that she's single.
F*CK THAT! -
Uh.. Duh. Yeah. Considering how many people use Facebook, primarily to get some, you bet your ass I'd mind. Even more, I'd wanna know why. I mean is she ashamed of me? Doesn't she want to tell someone? Am I a dirty little secret? Is she screwing around? Is she in want of something better?
So yeah, it would bother me. -
Yes, I would mind.
If this is my Girlfriend or a girl I'm seriously dating, with some expectation of more serious attachment to follow...you're damn right I mind. As soon as she changes her relationship status to 'single'...she WOULD be. After all her motive would have to be to shop around, play the field, put herself out there, right? Why not make it an honest accounting of her availability quotient? -
If he is a daily Facebook user and his profile says Single, then WTF.
If it doesn't say anything at all, fine. If he rarely uses Facebook, maybe that's okay.
It doesn't have to say Dating, but if it says single, he'd better have a damn good reason.
In the end tho, its a webpage.
One you can chat to girls on... ;) -
I wouldn't really pay attention to a girls FaceBook page, but if FaceBook is an important part of your life, and you like to post all your business on the internet I don't see why you wouldn't update that to say relationship unless you really need a lot of attention and like to toy with guys feelings over the internet.
- 730 opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
Not really but I'd sure ask her why is it that way without making her feel uncomfortable as much as possible.
If she's looking out she's free to do so, which means she's not convinced with me or my feelings for her. However, I won't rush out looking for another one myself if I am sure she's the one for me nor will I do anything extra to woo her and keep her in place. I'd want her to know and accept me as I am for her when she met me and is with me now. -
=) I think it's cute when the guys says it would bother them. lol.
-
Yes I would mind it and I would tell her to please change her status unless she doesn't have any FB account at all. Why use or make an FB account at all if your not responsible enough to dabble with it ><
-
Ok ill ask you your own question in my own words.
"YOUR HUSBANDS FACEBOOK STATUS SAYS DIVORCED" - 1.8K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
If she straight out said she was single in a post, then yes.
But if it jus says "Relationship Status: Single" I wouldn't really care. The only problem is I would have to put mine as single too because no one would be me if I just left it as "in a relationship" without the name of the girl I'm in it with. -
Depends on if he uses it often or not. if she doesn't use it often then I wouldn't care. But if she puts time into it every other day, I want my presence known.
-
Well I don't know about guys, but personally I would be VERY upset if I was dating/seriously dating a guy and his status still said 'single'. If I'm with you/your with me, then your not single and neither am I.
-
I wouldn't mind if she wanted to leave it blank (that's what I would do), but saying you're single when you're in a relationship would bother me.
-
I don't give two sh*ts what someone says on Facebook. It's only a website.
Click "Show More" for your mentions
Most Helpful Opinion(mho) Rate.
Learn more
Learn more
We're glad to see you liked this post.
You can also add your opinion below!
Most Helpful Opinions