My parents want to basically set up a marriage for me. This isn't being done for religious purposes (me and my family are all agnostics). In fact its more for social/economic reasons. My family is wealthy and highly respected in our community. This girls' family is as well. My parents know her parents quite well as they go to many of the same functions. Her parents and my parents have been talking about getting us together with the intention to marry. The girl apparently is on board with the proposition. However, this is likely because she has been raised to never question her parents' judgement and obey their every command. My parents and her parents are sticklers for marrying within the same class and background which is why they think this arrangement is perfect.
I have met their daughter only once. She is 20 and I am 22. She is studying to be a designer and I am currently in law school. However, the expectation is that when we marry, she will stay at home (her family's expectations not mine). I don't know her enough to say whether I like her or not. Personally, I don't know how to feel about this proposition. I know it would make my parents happy. I know it will be a lot easier for them to set me up with this girl instead of me having to go to a club/bar and meeting them for myself. My parents told me that they and her parents are willing to let us date for a year before getting engaged. They plan to marry us once I graduate law school and get a place at a firm. Her parents and my parents told us that they are going to build and furnish a house for us and give us a "nest egg" in the bank. It seems really nice to be all snug and set up.
Even though this idea seems quite logical, a part of me feels like I am going to be robbed of my youth. I won't be able to enjoy my twenties because I am going to get a wife and then kids and a house. It also feels as if my parents and her parents are going to be uber controlling our marriage. What should I do?
Most Helpful Girl
huh I guess movies about rich and wealthy people are true...ok in this situation you would really have to ask yourself if you say no and find yourself a poor girl would they support you? My answer would be no because your family wants more wealth however I do not know that for sure...so what if its the same situation and you just go off and have fun will they still support you? And if not, will you be able to support yourself?
If I were in your place I would not get married just yet one because I am 22 and I want to know what other kinds of people out there, two I would want to travel by myself and meet people, three I would travel the world, study different cultures, visit every scientific community lol (ok so I am a science geek) but unfortunately I am not 22 and I am not you these are the things I would love to do if I were in your position and I am pretty sure you want to do something on your own too before you settle down and if you do get married you are right you will get robbed of your youth...0