He only married me so we could move in together?

I've found out my husband only really proposed to and got married to me so he could see what it was like to live with a girl. he's a traveller so we couldn't live together before we were married so got married pretty quickly. he's cheated on me pretty much throughout and now i learnt he only married me to see what it was like but he says he did love me. i dont know if we got married with the right intentions, he finds the marriage hard but we are trying at the moment to make it work. he constantly says to take it one day at a time


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It doesn't sound like he actually loves you, whether he thinks he does or not. I'm sure he knew that cheating on you would hurt you and he did it anyway -- and it sounds like he did it a lot. The guy sounds like he has some pretty bad character and very selfish morals, I'd leave him and start trying to find a guy that will treat you right.

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What Guys Said 6

  • see what it was like... sounds too flippant to be real, sorry = don't buy this and don't embrace it into your psyche, it will become false evidence someday

    now think traveler sex = alcoholic or even smoker
    and how impossible to quit this is for some
    e. g. even at AA meetings some long time members show up with recent DWI tickets
    yes - one day at a time - is very real

    believe that one day he'll have an Eureka moment that gives him the will to quit others
    until then, you must protect yourself from STDs - these kill

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    • so him saying to see what it was like is a good thing to say? i should be ok with that?

    • so him saying that is BS!!! is what I was trying to communicate to you
      Blow that statement off
      If he knew what he was saying & doing, he could reform faster!

  • Normally I'm for people staying married but why are you really even married? He basically said he is using you for a experiment. He had no problem cheating on you. He still talks to her. That part just proves he still cares about her. The one day at a time sounds like bs. You should think about seeing a marriage counselor just to see if you should even consider your marriage real. Take him too if you want. If he doesn't want to go then it just helps prove he doesn't care about you.

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  • How on earth did you even manage to marry him without seeing this premise behind him?

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  • You need to get rid of this guy.

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  • Does he still cheat on you? That should be unacceptable! Have you considered divorce? Don't force it if it's not meant to be

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    • no he doesn't anymore, i know he contacts the girl from time to time but he doesn't see her as he wants to try at the marriage

    • My heart goes out to you hun. That's the one thing I could never forgive some for: cheating. How would I be able to trust that person? It would ALWAYS be on my mind as I'm sure it is for you. You deserve to be happy and not treated that way

  • wow... :( sorry

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What Girls Said 1

  • Wow "take it one day at a time," meaning "put up with my bullshit and don't think into the future that you know won't be a damn way different".
    You could potentially get a legal annulment.
    Aside from him marrying you just to use you, he's been cheating on you.
    There is no reason to stay. You know you deserve better.
    I've been married before as well. I used to think I was supposed to put up with absurdity. You are putting up with absurdity.

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