Told my guy I won't move in unless I am married, how should he react?

He said imagine if we lived together. we have been dating a month and half. He's above 30 and thinking of moving to a new place but not far away.

I told him "just to be honestly clear I do not live with someone unless there's a ring on my finger. It's against my principles to live together if I'm not married to the guy. I'm not telling you to marry me but I just want to be honest because this is something extremely important to me that I won't change my mind on."

His response was to say he loves how straightforward and direct I am and besides that he just listened.

Does this mean he is ok with my principles? Because I like him a lot but if he would never marry me I would rather cut my losses early.

I am not trying to insult people who live together. Marriage before living together is just a strong belief of mine and I cannot sacrifice my values for a person.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You do realize how horrible of an idea it is to get married and THEN move in together? That would be like buying a car and then taking it for a test drive. Or having sex and then putting on a condom. Or killing yourself and then writing a suicide note. Or pissing yourself and then pulling down your pants. Or... hopefully you get my point by now.

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    • Hey it's still her choice whether or not you and I agree with it doesn't mean you should try to pressure her into living with him sooner than she is ready. Only a month and a half is way too fast to official live together either way.

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    • And yet 60-70% of all of today's married couples around the world have lived together for at least a year before getting married. America is the only country that still calls that sort of thing "living in sin".

    • There's actually some pro's to waiting to move in... but whatever. You seem very pressed about the subject.

What Guys Said 1

  • Most sensible men would react by ending the relationship.
    You principles are likely to lead him into an early divorce or an unhappy marriage, and he may not want to gamble with what's left of his future. Even if it's only a small chance, there's a lot at stake.

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What Girls Said 1

  • He seems ok with it and like he respects you a lot. It's good that you're sticking to your beliefs and it probably makes him like you more. It probably won't cause him to put a ring on it any time soon but it will strengthen your relationship.

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    • Yeah I just want him to know that in the future I want to be married and I will not sacrifice my values and I would rather lose him then not get married. I don't want to get married now but if he cares for me he will marry me it we last

    • I'm not a fan of that view but I agree with you. You should sacrifice your values and it will lead to a better relationship in the long run.

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