If my boyfriend said this should I be offended?

If my boyfriend asks me to pick between getting a home or an engagement ring, should I be offended?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, as some who just recently got engaged, I can say he has somewhat of a valid point. I love the engagement ring I got, but now we are struggling with "do we want to have a big, nice wedding or do we want to have a nice down payment on a house? " I think your boyfriend is being realistic to a certain extent, but honestly he needs to consider your feelings too. Have you given him some sort of indication that you want a ridiculously nice ring? Let him know you just are looking for a symbol of a commitment from him, not an overpriced diamond. It's not really fair for him to say one or the other. After all, if he is expecting you to move into that house and build a life together, then he needs to make some sort of commitment to you. Good luck!

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What Guys Said 3

  • Not at all. Maybe he can't afford both and he realizes that instead of spending huge money on a ring, a more logical way would be to get a home for you two. This also doesn't mean that he won't get a ring, just not an expensive one so he can spend the money on the house and get you a smaller ring. If he is pretty rich though then he is flat out cheap.

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  • Not unless he's loaded with cash. People got money trouble and it's trending toward more poverty unless you are hanging on and climbing into the upper middle class and above segment. Anything beneath that and, well, it could be bad if anything goes wrong. Being cheap is becoming necessary.

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  • I know of a couple that recently got married and instead of spending there money on a wedding they went to the courthouse in jeans and got married. They then took the money from the wedding and bought a house. Believe it or not my answer is yes because he can still get you a cheap ring say a 1,000 dollars which isn't going to change whether you have enough for a house or not. I don't understand how he can't get both. Good luck though!

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What Girls Said 4

  • Offended?! You should feel good about either! Both of those items are pretty big investments that would be hard to afford at the same time. It's awesome that he is offering you the choice. I wish I had a boyfriend like that. =)

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  • No, but even that is out of line to say. Now a days rings are just too damn expensive. (my guy though it was cute to get me a Ring Pop for Valentines Day) We all want the big stones, so we can show our families and friends, and be like "see that bitch, its Mine! "

    Try asking him for something that would be worth putting on your finger. Or just hold a gun to his head.

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  • No, like people have already said it may be expensive. My boyfriend got me a ring that was like really cheap. It was a lord of the rings ring. It was special because its our favorite movie. So tell him it doesn't matter how little it costs you will still like it. And maybe lol if he finds one that isn't too expensive then you can get a house as well. =]

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  • Yes. That's like asking you to pick between ice cream and cake they go together. A ring without the house is just engagement and I've seen people be engaged for over 5 years. A house without the ring is just playing house.

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