What is your opinion on a girl proposing?

I am very progressive to say the least. I have set standards for myself, am open about them with my partner, and glad to have one very accepting of my ideals. I DONT plan on taking my husband's last name, I plan on having a child take my family name (no - at all), and like this topic is about, I plan on possibley being the one to propose. Yes, I a girl, would like to be the one to propose. Though I'm not going to propose any time soon. We (me and my bf) agreed after moving into together to not move much more forward until after i finish college. So, what do you think? My bf had no problem with the idea, what about everyone else? The poll things is set up for guys mainly to answers, but girls answer how you would if you were the guy being proposed too. Thanks to any answers!

  • No surpise, I'd say yes
    17% (6)34% (10)25% (16)Vote
  • I'd think it be a little odd, but I'd say yes.
    43% (15)21% (6)33% (21)Vote
  • I'm tradtional, I would rather be the one to propose.
    11% (4)31% (9)20% (13)Vote
  • I'd flat out say no.
    3% (1)7% (2)5% (3)Vote
  • It depends.
    26% (9)7% (2)17% (11)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

0|0
7|8

Most Helpful Girl

  • You sound remarkably mature for a 20-year-old, and it sounds like you've got good reasons for the decisions you're making. Good for you. I may propose someday myself, and will definitely not be taking my partner's name. Fuck that hater. As if what you plan on doing has AAAANYTHING to do with him.

    1|0
    0|0
    • I'll be honest, I was scared to read your comment. I'm still on edge from being called a bitch in the other comment. So many have been coming with negative comments because hey, I'm different. Thanks for having something so nice to say. I don't do anything without reason, I got my mother's wisdom with that. And I do hope you propose if you choose too. If my bf decided to beat me to it, I have no problems! Love is love, and marriage is just a way to show off to the word our annoying gooey love for each other. :) Again, thanks for the nice comment and answering my question!

    • OMG I get like that all the time on Facebook sometimes. People jump down your throat for the most random, innocuous-sounding things, and after that happens a few times, you're afraid that's going to happen every time you get a notification so you just stop looking. Sometimes.

    • Glad to know I'm not alone :)

What Guys Said 8

  • Are you a religious person? Do you even believe in a God? If you don't then what is the point of a marriage? If your not going to go through much of the "traditional" stuff or even give the child it's fathers name then what is the point of trying to for a "traditional" union aka marriage. Why not just keep the boyfriend, make a promise to each other and live your lives together?

    1|0
    1|0
    • Because times have changed, and we believe as long as marriages are/can be run by government, we can be married as well. Religious or not. We can do what we want, and I'm not against traditions. Some traditions I actually like, still, everything can change. Tradition wasn't tradition until someone started them, and I want to help grow the idea a woman can propose to a guy. It's not crazy. Where I live married couples get benefit and shares more than just a couple living together. Why should we be denied then when we love each other just as much as the married couple? Married couples who may also not be religious themselves either. Besides, i like the side of marriage that shows the commitment to each other and love and promise to one another. I believe marriage is a sign of love and faith in each other. I don't believe it needs faith in God to exist or flurish. My opinion and that's yours. Thanks for answering honestly.

    • Times may change but God will stay God and traditional will stay traditional. Soon enough we this world will allow 3 or 4 people to get married like all male or female. I am Christian and honestly I am horrified to see what humans have done to marriage, love, and virginity (it isn't even special anymore)

  • All for girls asking guys out, proposing is kinda just his thing.
    As for your last name, I wouldn't get married unless it was my last name, no hyphenating.

    1|0
    1|1
  • as per the question... yes, I'd be very interested, its kind of sexy

    however, I'd have no interest in a girl who is progressive / doesn't believe in traditional (read: biologically inherent) gender roles

    1|0
    1|0
  • Surely it all depends on whether I like the girl enough to see ourselves together for the rest of our lives?

    1|0
    0|0
  • Why not? This really should be a non issue.

    1|0
    0|0
  • It's certainly unusual but there's nothing wrong with it.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I will never get married because of financial reasons, but I would have absolutely no problem with one proposing, in fact I think the party that wants to get married more (usually women) should propose themselves instead of trying to push someone to do it for them. efficiency ftw

    0|0
    0|0
    • About the last name thing, I'd prefer for her to take my last name, but wouldn't care TOO much, but my kids absolutely MUST have my last name; no hyphenations.

  • I plan on either giving my kid my name, hyphenating the two names orrrrr just not having a kid at all. I'm an only child and I'll be damned if the girl is going to give it her name, when my parents are counting on me to keep my name going, so f- you on that. Also, I think that the girl proposing is stupid and emasculating, so, I'll be damned if she decides to. If she does, I'll say no, and immediately break up with her, as I believe it's the mans job. You've already moved in, and you're only under 18? Are you kidding me? I was under the impression you had to be at least 18 to move out... what the hell happened there... I think you're pathetic

    1|0
    2|0
    • I am my father's only daughter. Last to my name why should I give up my family name for another guy? Where is my right to continue my family line? Also, I'm almost 20. I put the wrong year when when I made my account. My bad for making a mistake. No need to be so hostile, but I will be hostile back if I must. I'm not trying to impose my ideas on you or anyone. I just prefer something different. And you think I'm pathetic? Okay. You're someone I'll probably never meet. Your opinion isn't something I'll ever care about. In the end, I respect honesty and standard, I'm glad you gave me both. We are different and won't agree, but I'll still thanks for answering my question. No matter how rude. Such a man you are. Have a nice day.

    • Show All
    • Because i want what you guys have naturally be given and allowed to have. No question asked? I never liked I was being restricted because "it's a guys pride thing", like the last name or the child. Why are my choices second? Why are you default? Times have changed, and if my bf really had a problem we could have worked on a connected last name. Or our child getting his middle or first name to carry on. The name didn't bother him, so I gladly just asked him to go along with my ideas. If he really didn't want it, I can work it out. So no, I'm far from a bitch, but I hell sure will be if I'm accused as one for stating my mind. You know nothing about me, so ignorance is your benefit today. Your judgements sharp with such little information. Just a piece about me. So watch who you speak your mind just as well too. Our conversation is done. Goodbye.

    • I may sound like an old school gal but i totally agree with you, i hate that all these girls are all "Women rights Women rights". A women created by God was meant to be a helper of her husband not a LEADER. Girls will hate me for this but a man is a man and he gotta so what he gotta do, bring the money home have the last say. I am not saying us girls should be used by men in the wrong way. But anyway i hope your opinion stays strong because there aren't many males like you left.

What Girls Said 6

  • i think its pathetic. if a guy wanted to marry her then he would ask. women can say they are progressive all day long but all they are doing is shooting themselves in the foot and taking the mans role away from him. men aren't shy or scared when they want a woman.

    0|0
    2|0
  • Well men are usually seen as more inclined to want to mate with multiple women biologically or socially so it means more when they propose imo. Women don't usually have this desire to spread their seeds to many men because they dont have seeds they just have an abnormally high sex drive.
    Also people get married for economic-legal tax reasons and so that they're child would be considered legitimate. Some people haveexpensive weddings, some have inexpensive weddings. Some have religious weddings others have only civil weddings/unions. Etc.

    0|0
    2|0
    • We thought more civil court house. We're not religious, and marriage money be better put towards a house. And though you biology statement is correct, by nature we do this and that, but some of our natural things we can't do as a socitey in order to work. Like sanitary things. Like a male marking territory with piss. Some things we must evolve out of or control from. Some men don't want the alpha status and some women may want a multiple partnership. Things are changing, and so is our basic biology and sociology. As long as things like this hold us back, people not accepting that which does not harm us as a whole, we're only harming ourselves and blaming a cause with no blood on It's hands. Just ours. Also, love your profile pic. One of my favs~

    • I can understand that. I dont think human men ever marked anything with thier urine because we dont have the nose like that of a canine that can read information automatically by smelling the urine. As longas men have semen they're going to get the idea to spread it around (even though they can damn well control themselves).
      Thanks you :)

  • B - it's cute and a bit strange, but it can be very romantic if done properly. =)

    2|0
    0|0
  • I don't mean to sound rude or anything but if you're so progressive why keep your father's last name when it basically states his ownership of you? in my opinion it's pretty much the same thing as taking your husband's name.

    I'm all for girls proposing though.

    1|0
    0|0
    • He died, and it's my way of remembering him. Also, my last name was my grandmother's maiden. My grandfather let my dad have my grandma's name to carry Instead of his, which is what probably started my wanting have it carried. Because she was the first female in my family to do so. So i honor her as well. Tradtion, though not all of it, can be important to me to. But some traditions need a 21st century upgrade. Some do not work welll in our times. Like I don't feel ownership in my last name. I feel love. A history of families I'm connected to. My last name is special, history good or bad, it's mine. I want to keep and hopefully watch it grow. My children may be the end, and give it up with no successor. So be it. That is their decisions, not mine. But if i can make it last, i will try. If my bf really had an issue, we could discuss. But he has a brother, and I'm alone to carry. Giving up his name is his greatest show of love in my eyes. Not much more to say

    • Show All
    • No problem! (:

  • I think its great! Its the 21st century, tradition isn't traditional anymore. You sound like you know what you want, so go for it (:

    1|0
    0|0
  • Personally, this is one tradition that should stay. Guys should propose. Why should they? Boys should be in control of that situation. To me it's like cutting ofF their man hood. If a girl proposes it almost seems needy or desperate. ( I'm not saying they are... it just seems that way.)

    2|0
    1|0
    • That is not an image my bf probably wants. But what's unmanly about it? Because a girl for a few seconds or minutes Is the assertive one in the relationship? And I guess I'll appear needy and desperate. Oh well. His opinion is one of the few I care about, so if he accepts I accept. And vice versa too! Thanks for answering honestly :)

    • That's truly all that matters. Obviously the man you marry will love you as much as you love him. As long as you guys are fine with it, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.

      My cousin hyphenated hers and her kids names.
      My sister and her husband agreed that if they have two songs the first would have his last name and the second her maiden so he could carry on our last name since our last name is dwindling in our family.

      As a whole, our society is breaking away from traditions. It's what happens when time goes on. You're lucky to find a guy who accepts everything you are wanting! I wish you and your husband to be (one day) have a wonderful life together!!

Loading...