Opinions about getting engaged before moving to another state to be with your currently long-distance partner?

I'm giving up EVERYTHING to move over 1000 miles and 17 hours away to move in with him in his native state when I graduate in December. I'm 24, he's 27 (so we're adults here capable of making these decisions) we will have been dating for a year and a half when I graduate, and we both agree that we're more advanced than other couples dating our length of time bc of the nature of a LDR (due to superb communication etc) I'm ok with the state and town, I fell in love with it - I look forward to living there. But of course I love my family and friends and he knows I LOVE the beach, which I am only a couple hours away from the shore living here, and there I won't be - and I grew up here... so to me, if I'm giving up all of that, it should be on the basis of engagement and marriage, and not just based on a dating relationship. I'd like him to propose in December when I graduate, sure, but even if he didn't I'd be ok with it, cause I don't want it to be rushed, unless he really did plan to propose then. And I don't want to set a strict time limit on anything, but I NEED to know that it'll happen within the next 1-2 years of living together bc I always believed in being married before moving in with someone, and I have to respect myself and my beliefs. I respect others for their decisions, but that's just what I want. And it's not like he lives 20 minutes away from me - or even a couple hours - I'm moving from the south to way up north for him, and to give up my whole life here, find a job there, etc... I'm not being too demanding when I try to make it clear that I expect to be engaged within the next couple of years, right?

Cause the truth is, if we lived in the same town, after I graduated, I'd get my own place and wait til I was married to move in with him. But considering our circumstances, I know it can't quite go like that, and I'm ok with that. I just need a commitment, or a promise that a commitment will happen soon, if I make this move.

Ya know?

Opinions?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Anytime you make a decision based solely on an idea instead of for yourself, you're taking a risk. And in your case it's a big one. The idea here is an engagement. The risk is that you're moving in hopes or because of one to a place that under normal circumstances never think twice about.

    Honestly, I don't like any of it. But we have different beliefs so it doesn't matter. What about a promise ring, in case he hadn't planned an engagement? If I was him, and thus was the case, I'd be down for that.

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What Girls Said 0

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