I'm hitting my mid 20s and finishing graduate school in less than a year and looking for jobs.
I am ready to get married and start a family. I am not so religious but my culture is marriage and family oriented and so am I.
I have been in a relationship with a guy in his 30s for two months. So far it's going well. We spoke about what we want and he knows that I want to be married and have children. He wants that too he claims and so far he treats our relationship seriously. I met his mom and friends. He is taking me to a friends wedding. He talks future and is kind. I do like him a lot and it's rare to find a sweet guy like him who I click with. I would hate to lose him.
But I have seen so many women I know spend years in a relationship never getting married.
I want to be a married mother. As much as I like this guy I cannot sacrifice my biggest dream for him. I believe you have to look out for yourself first and not sacrifice yourself for someone else because you'll hate yourself and the other person for it. I know that as much as I like him I would grow to hate him if he took years of my life especially now in my prime without committing.
If he doesn't commit in a certain time I will break up even though it may hurt. What's a good time frame? I am thinking that based on our ages and life phases I should probably leave the relationship if I don't have a proposal or clear plan that it's coming up soon, in a year from now.
And if a girl is serious about marriage how long should she date someone without a proposal? At this point in my life I am not going to spend years in a relationship without a ring.
I am guessing it's probably better to keep dating older if I want marriage minded men? (If I have to break up with my bf) Maybe late 20s and 30s?
Most Helpful Girl
He is talking future and kids. So that is good, you two seem on the same boat.
Honestly, I think two months is absolutely nothing. As you state, wait at least a year. I think everything else would sound too pushy. The best would be to live together beforehand (if your culture permits). A marraige is also no guarantee not to lose someone.
You are right, you should not waste your time on someone who is never going to commit to you anyways, but through your question it sounds, like you already want a statement from him and already consider breaking up, looking for a new date. That contradicts very much with saying you found the guy you want to marry. Are you in it for the guy or the marriage? My ex was saying, "if you break up with me now, the last 5 years were a waste of time". I find that a very sad statement, it did not show me, that he actually appreciated the time with me.(so much to my relationship)
You are under 25 according to your status, so I don't really see, why you need to rush into it?0