Has anyone ever thought polygamy might not be such a bad idea?

Society has molded us to be a certain way, and its looked down upon. But without all that society nonsense would it be fun being in a relationship with more than one person?

More minds, more love to share, a bigger party? Or do you think as humans our internal territorial instincts would come out with jealousy and bitterness?

  • its weird and i can't wrap my mind around it
    40% (4)18% (3)26% (7)Vote
  • it might be cool if society didn't paint it as a bad thing
    30% (3)35% (6)33% (9)Vote
  • Im in a polygamist relationship i got two chicks at home cooking me dinner
    0% (0)12% (2)7% (2)Vote
  • if you've never tried it, can you really judge?
    30% (3)35% (6)34% (9)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Any guy that has had 1 wife would never do it. It is bad enough with non stop rain of shit one wife brings down on you. Why the hell would you ever want more then 1? and the jealousy that you would have to deal with when you have multiple women? OMG forgetaboutit. they are insane.

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What Guys Said 13

  • Everyone in the polyamorous community is already aware that polygamy (which would actually let them get married to the people they loved) is not such a bad idea.

    Jealousy, possessiveness, ownership... the benchmarks of a good monogamous relationship, are not really 'good' attributes, they have just been enforced by society for so long that people are unable to comprehend their lives with their absence. Just because a person can't understand a concept doesn't make the concept 'wrong', and that seems to be the problem for a lot of people.

    It obviously can't just be polygyny though, it has be to be free and open and equal for all partners. There has to be informed consent. There has to be lots of things, really, for it to work well.

    Plus, this idea that marriage has "always" meant one man, one woman, is just silly. The Bible talks about the Right of the Firstborn, about what happens when you have a first born son from two DIFFERENT wives for crying out loud. And how many wives did King David have? This stuff isn't coming up because they were looking into the future and seeing issues with polygyny. It was coming up because men were marrying more than one woman, right then, at that time. So the idea that it has ALWAYS been this way is ridiculous. It is a construct, not some 'only way'. It is not natural for mammals, it arose basically to control ownership of reproductive rights.

    So, can it be 'fun' to be able to love someone unconditionally, instead of the enforced conditional love allowed through monogamy? Yes, of course. It can have problems like any other relationship. Someone saying unconditional love does not feel as good as monogamist love has clearly never experienced it, and has been hammered by society for so long that they cannot even comprehend how it would feel without their own feelings of jealousy and possessiveness coming into it.

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  • If everyone's happy with the arrangement you make (and it would be unique to your relationships) it could be absolutely amazing. I've read a lot about it and been told about it by people in poly relationships but never experienced it myself.

    Obnoxious people, like in Futurama: Beast With A Billion Backs, would be a problem.

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  • I don't think there's anything wrong with it but when it comes to raising kids I think two parents would be ideal but I honestly don't care what other people do with their lives.

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  • It's interesting to think about. I'd be lying if I said the idea didn't excite me, and not just for the obvious reasons. More money, more help around the house, etc. More... love?

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  • Technically I used to claim that monogamy was better because you invest resources in your own child and thus have focused attention, but having more people in the same household makes it easier to delegate tasks. I voted D), but I kinda shoulda voted B). It's definitely better than serial monogamy.

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    • Things would be more efficient in the household definitely as long as everyone pulled their own weight, think about how much of our lives are wasted on mundane tasks its probably some ridiculous number

  • It is illegal to be a polygamist. That means married to one person at a time. It is legal to be a polyamorist. That means more than one lover at a time. You can live together, sleep together, raise children with more than one other person but the moment that you marry into a polygamist marriage you are breaking the law. Hence I would just opt for the option of being a polyamorist.

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    • its almost like gay marriage being illegal, doesn't it sound similar the government telling you a marriage is between 1 man and 1 women?

    • Yes I do and i agree that this doesn't sound quite right. On the other hand though, the government overlooks polyamory and (as a side-note I personally don't even see that much value in marriage, just a piece of paper) so I don't really care. I am happy being in polyamorist relationships.

  • I fully support the polygamous freedom to marry as part of full marriage equality. Don't fall into the trap of thinking polygamy can only be polygyny, meaning one man with multiple women. There's also one woman with multiple men (polyandry) as well as multiple men with multiple women, or three or more people of the same sex. Let consenting adults have the relationships they want.

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  • It is not so much society which has the rule over this but us as humans. When a mother gives birth and holds her kid in her arms, she releases a chemical secreted by the brain called oxytocin, this hormone causes the feeling of closeness, love and possession of this baby. Try taking that baby from her and you won't live another day

    Similarly, when we hug our partners or have a sexual encounter, this hormone causes us to feel that closeness and trust with our partner. Therefore we cannot bear the thought of losing out to someone else or sharing our SO because of the jealousy, possessiveness and frailty we feel as a result

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    • I don't know how i would feel... maybe i could love and trust two people but maybe like you said the jealousy would creep in

  • I came from a culture where polygamy was OK. Husbands weren't doing it in a matter of flexing their ego, or showing-off. And the men who did this were rich, and my opinion, they were able to afford a 2nd or 3rd, AND probably this rich husband is from a family with a great reputation and wanted to spread his seeds. Wives "usually" don't establish hatred with each other.

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  • Those bitches would rip each other apart.

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  • I don't think it should be illegal. I can also see benefits of a bunch of people sharing money, resources, and time.

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  • Polygyny, to be more specific. You can call it polygamy but in reality more than 90% of the relationships would be men with multiple wives, not the other way around.

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    • What makes you say this?

    • i didn't even know it was called something different if men took on multiple wives... interesting fact

    • A few things:

      1) Men seem to have more polygamous mating habits than women do. Typically when women cheat, they stop having much sex with their other, men typically cheat because their needs aren't being met or because they get caught up in the moment. Women are more "serially monogamous", men are more truly polygamous. Our reproductive systems reflect this as well.

      2) Women find men more attractive when they know that the man is desired by other women. This would lead to a positive feedback loop for the men with mates, whereby having more wives makes you more attractive to women, enabling you to acquire even more wives.

  • I see no moral issue with it but it would complicate the tax system because people could have more dependents via polygamy.

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What Girls Said 8

  • IT would be fun but then again dangerous because of the jealously thing I think it would promote more murders though so leave things as they are that could be entering into a war zone

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  • I could never do it. but I know for some, people its not a crazy idea to share a person, a home, love etc. Society has given it a bad image but the truth is its what some people work best with while others need a more monogamous relationship such as myself.

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    • I mean look at society the way it is now men and women are cheating on each other all the time. Look at ashleymadison. com a website made for married people that's just wrong on so many levels. At least in a polygamist situation everyone is up front from the beginning

  • I don't care what people do with their love lives and i personally don't get why some people are so against it. I would never do it but i don't care if other people do it

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  • I don't think I can have more than one partner.. I'd feel guilty

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  • Whatever works best for everyone involved.

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  • Monogamy seems virtually impossible if you take away the societal boundaries. That would be nice wouldn't it? Everyone just doing whatever they wanted with each other, Im not being sarcastic, Im a free spirit. On the other hand I can only handle so much man drama or lady drama at a time. Im not particularly competitive, but I do want everybody to love everybody! Maybe not have sex with everybody lol

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  • No, monogamy is what it is best for me.

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  • I see no problem with it as long as everyone knows what's going on and are consenting adults.

    The problem comes into play when it's 14 year old girls or people are cheating.

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