I know this will sound horrible but your Mother was raised during a time when money meant everything. She was brought up when women must whore themselves even in marriage so she would have enough money for her children. This has caused a lot of problems with men over the years and is a leading reason why men do not want to pay child support.
this is just ridiculous! you shouldn't base your relationship on your partners financial status! a engagement/wedding ring is a symbol of your love and devotion to one another. if he loves you enough to ask you to marry him then that should be all you need.
At the same time it is not wise to be planning a wedding if neither is financially able to support themselves. My husband and I waited two years to get married because we weren't comfortable both being unemployed college students when we got married. I realize love can conquer a lot of things, but if there is no money for simple necessities, then it doesn't make sense to get married. I agree though that the love shouldn't be erased merely because of financial status. Money comes and goes.
Nope - I disagree entirely. You don't even know what her mother's expectations are (except in reference to this ring). Allowing parents to interfere with your relationship is no good. But then, most normal parents just want the best for their children. Find ways to reassure her that you are HAPPY with this person and she should back off. It's hard for parents to let go of their babies. If that is not enough - then there is a problem of boundary setting, and it is time for you to help her realize
That she has an adult daughter who is in love and who is happy... one who won't just run off and abandon the relationship with her mother/parents, but one who needs to get out and start a life of her own (make mistakes on her own). It's hard for parents... even when you think they are crazy... even when you don't agree. Try not to alienate them - we only have so much life to live. Family is important, and you never know when your parents will be gone.
@bitesizedonut my engament ring cost 10 + tax, I just saw it in a Ross store, to be honest it kinda broke my heart cuz I'm not sure how to feel about I know we don't have much, but 10 bucks really made me feel like I'm not investment at all. I told my fiancée I saw it and I felt dispointed in way one and another ashame that I care about this because now it has a number and not so much the intention that it means... I wish I never saw it so I didn't have to find out that it's 10 like a machine ring or shit... hopefully when we get married I get carried away with this nonsense of how I feel. After all my mom never got an engagement ring and she's still with my dad... but still it made me sad to feel carried away with how materialist I feel right now :( even thou I'm not a money digger obviusly, but for sure I was dreaming about something more magestic
Not really! Feelings matter and nothing more. You can buy a cheap engagement in a pawn shop ( ) and live happily together. by the way, you may find a wider variety of styles that suit your taste in a pawn shop as their collection is made up of a much larger sampling of jewelry from both major outlets like those you see in the mall, and smaller jewelry stores that do custom work.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
forget the ring, anything in the fashion world, jewelry, makeup, whatever- price/brand personally never matters to me, if I love it, I have to have it and that's all that matters. Whether the item is from a 99cent store or Tiffany and Co., it all just depends on taste and what looks good, no one asks me hey how much was that for, or what brand are you wearing?
who cares what your mom thinks. you and him are in love. the price of the ring doesn't matter. tell your mom thanks for her opinion but its not important to you about price. tell her you rather him spend the money on the honeymoon.
Granted the rule is 2 months worth of salary for an engagement ring, but honestly it shouldn't matter. As long as you love each other and want to get married...it doesn't matter how much the ring costs.
If yer fellow ain't poneying up for a nice rock, well than what does that say about his commitment to you? He needs to spend a good year's salary for this whole wedding business for it to be worth your time.
Seriously, you can ignore your mom's nagging because that is your marriage and not hers. It's want you want and there's no need for you to succumb to mom's-nagging-pressure whatever. You love him that's why you are getting married with him isn't it?
It's not the actual price. It's the fact that if he can't afford a nice ring, then how can he take care of you? Maybe you are too young? I am not sure but those are some thoughts. For me its not about the money, it's the idea behind the money.
I personally don’t think it does… you can have an engagement ring that looks expensive without spending too much. I found that a clever way of doing that is by designing my own engagement ring, that way I could play around with the setting and the diamonds and see how much they cost and create an engagement ring that looked amazing and did not bankrupt me… I used this site: zoara.com But you can pretty much find design your own engagement ring sites all over the web…
Follow your heart and know your mom is right too. If your heart follows him still maybe you too are not ready to get married but work your career to make a comfort level not a struggle. Money doesn't bring happiness but shows how your living
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I know this will sound horrible but your Mother was raised during a time when money meant everything. She was brought up when women must whore themselves even in marriage so she would have enough money for her children. This has caused a lot of problems with men over the years and is a leading reason why men do not want to pay child support.
this is just ridiculous! you shouldn't base your relationship on your partners financial status! a engagement/wedding ring is a symbol of your love and devotion to one another. if he loves you enough to ask you to marry him then that should be all you need.
At the same time it is not wise to be planning a wedding if neither is financially able to support themselves. My husband and I waited two years to get married because we weren't comfortable both being unemployed college students when we got married. I realize love can conquer a lot of things, but if there is no money for simple necessities, then it doesn't make sense to get married. I agree though that the love shouldn't be erased merely because of financial status. Money comes and goes.
I agree. you shouldn't spend money if you don't have it.
Your mom sounds like a gold digger. Wow. I'd totally ignore everything she says.
She's not a gold digger... she was merely born in different times and has different expectations of this young man.
Her expectations are going to harm your marriage if you aren't careful.
Nope - I disagree entirely. You don't even know what her mother's expectations are (except in reference to this ring). Allowing parents to interfere with your relationship is no good. But then, most normal parents just want the best for their children. Find ways to reassure her that you are HAPPY with this person and she should back off. It's hard for parents to let go of their babies. If that is not enough - then there is a problem of boundary setting, and it is time for you to help her realize
That she has an adult daughter who is in love and who is happy... one who won't just run off and abandon the relationship with her mother/parents, but one who needs to get out and start a life of her own (make mistakes on her own). It's hard for parents... even when you think they are crazy... even when you don't agree. Try not to alienate them - we only have so much life to live. Family is important, and you never know when your parents will be gone.
@bitesizedonut my engament ring cost 10 + tax, I just saw it in a Ross store, to be honest it kinda broke my heart cuz I'm not sure how to feel about I know we don't have much, but 10 bucks really made me feel like I'm not investment at all. I told my fiancée I saw it and I felt dispointed in way one and another ashame that I care about this because now it has a number and not so much the intention that it means... I wish I never saw it so I didn't have to find out that it's 10 like a machine ring or shit... hopefully when we get married I get carried away with this nonsense of how I feel. After all my mom never got an engagement ring and she's still with my dad... but still it made me sad to feel carried away with how materialist I feel right now :( even thou I'm not a money digger obviusly, but for sure I was dreaming about something more magestic
Not really! Feelings matter and nothing more. You can buy a cheap engagement in a pawn shop (
) and live happily together. by the way, you may find a wider variety of styles that suit your taste in a pawn shop as their collection is made up of a much larger sampling of jewelry from both major outlets like those you see in the mall, and smaller jewelry stores that do custom work.
forget the ring, anything in the fashion world, jewelry, makeup, whatever- price/brand personally never matters to me, if I love it, I have to have it and that's all that matters. Whether the item is from a 99cent store or Tiffany and Co., it all just depends on taste and what looks good, no one asks me hey how much was that for, or what brand are you wearing?
who caressssssssssssss!
=p
who cares what your mom thinks. you and him are in love. the price of the ring doesn't matter. tell your mom thanks for her opinion but its not important to you about price. tell her you rather him spend the money on the honeymoon.
Granted the rule is 2 months worth of salary for an engagement ring, but honestly it shouldn't matter. As long as you love each other and want to get married...it doesn't matter how much the ring costs.
who made that rule up? The jewelers looking to take your cash. The person you'll see once and that's it. The money can be better spent on a honeymoon.
'course it matters lovie!
If yer fellow ain't poneying up for a nice rock, well than what does that say about his commitment to you? He needs to spend a good year's salary for this whole wedding business for it to be worth your time.
Love don't cost a thing
You know, poor people can fall in love, too
I suppose that's true.
Seriously, you can ignore your mom's nagging because that is your marriage and not hers. It's want you want and there's no need for you to succumb to mom's-nagging-pressure whatever. You love him that's why you are getting married with him isn't it?
It's not the actual price. It's the fact that if he can't afford a nice ring, then how can he take care of you? Maybe you are too young? I am not sure but those are some thoughts. For me its not about the money, it's the idea behind the money.
Love don't cost a thing!!
I personally don’t think it does… you can have an engagement ring that looks expensive without spending too much. I found that a clever way of doing that is by designing my own engagement ring, that way I could play around with the setting and the diamonds and see how much they cost and create an engagement ring that looked amazing and did not bankrupt me… I used this site: zoara.com But you can pretty much find design your own engagement ring sites all over the web…
The price of the ring doesn't matter, the thought behind it does.
In hypothetical land, my ideal ring is something that's been in his family.
the price doesn't matter at all, the ring is a symbol.
by the way that is a really nice ring
(the ring on the link)
sorry but your moms a bitch. tell her to let you make your own decisions. and if you really love him you won't let cost get in the way. wow
That's a pretty bold statement to make against some one you don't even know.
It shouldn't matter the price of the ring as long as it will last and won't tarnish and it doesn't come out of the gum ball dispenser! :)
Haha I like this answer :)
What about a cracker jack box?
That's a BEAU-TI-FUL ring...price doesn't matter...it's just the thought he had to purpose that matter...
Follow your heart and know your mom is right too. If your heart follows him still maybe you too are not ready to get married but work your career to make a comfort level not a struggle. Money doesn't bring happiness but shows how your living
Your mother is a disgrace.
Nothing to else to add but it doesn't matter if it was a rusty washer.
If the price of an engagment ring matters you probably shouldn' t be getting married.
Your mom is being a gold digging hag. Accept the ring and move on.
Or maybe her mother is just concerned.
Concerned of what? That he won't treat her like royalty? C'mon people 2 down arrows?