How do I tell my parents I'm getting married before college?

My boyfriend and I have been together since we were 14. We're both very intelligent and independent thinkers. We really aren't like most teenagers, and it sounds cliche but I know we're ready for marriage. We are currently seventeen, and after high school we are getting married. His parents love the idea and already know. My parents wanted me to wait until after college to get married, and that's completely reasonable, but its my life and I'm smart enough to make my own decisions. We're applying to two of the same universities. I make much better grades than he does, so there's a chance we won't both get accepted.
There are two plans, both involve marriage.
If we both get accepted we get married and fill out fafsa with our new non dependent information on it. We will find an apartment and get jobs.
If one of us doesn't get accepted we're going to move into the local city (or with his parents at first) and go to community college until our core classes are complete. And then find specialty schools for what we want to do.
Its financially smarter for us to get married, and we're ready for it. The only problem is how do I tell my parents? Really my mom. She just wants what's best for me but I can't help but think she'll be completely unsupportive.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • "Mom? Dad?
    "Yes dear?"
    "I'm getting married to *insert name*"
    "Before college?"
    "Yes."
    "Why?"
    "*Insert reasons you just listed here*"
    "Oh. Can we stop you?"
    "No."
    "Ok, when's the wedding?"

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What Guys Said 2

  • You're 17 now.
    You've know each other for 3 years.

    Life expectancy is probably going to be in the 90s in this century.

    So you guys are going to be together for the next 80-85 YEARS...

    That's a LONG time.

    Are you sure you want to COMMIT to someone THAT long THIS early? 85 years.

    Trust your mom, go to college, you might find some other guy there. There's wayy more guys in college, and from college, there's even more guys in the workforce. Highschool is a small place compared to the rest of the world :)

    And are you sure that once you 2 are in college, you might not find another guy you like?

    personally, I think you should wait until you are 25ish before you decide. Test the waters in the big world outside of high school first before you COMMIT to someone.. 85 years lol

    I personally use/will use high school (sophomore right now) as a stepping stone/practice with girls for college and the real world.

    I know that whatever relationship I have in high school will not last, even if I think she's THE ONE.. There's plenty of fish in the sea to choose from outside of school.

    You seem like a good student, and will get into a good college. Focus on your studies and future and get in a good college and meet a better guy :)

    That's what I'm planning on doing lol

    85 years is a long time..

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    • I didn't ask for advice on whether or not I should do it. Its my decision and I made it. Thank you for your input.

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    • Legit. I didn't even think you were a sophomore in high school

    • @Anjellygirlyeah

      Thanks!

      it's hard to tell in word context what's sarcasm and not :P

      I am a sophomore in high school lol

  • You sit them down and say mum, dad, I've decided to ruin my life...

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What Girls Said 2

  • I can tell you that if you are sure you're ready for marriage, just do it. Make sure though that if things do go sour to always have a private account in only your name with a savings (just to be safe!). Your parents will get over it, I know plenty of couples who live together in college or are married. Just tell your parents that this will help you focus more on college and making good grades, you won't be focused on dating. It's probably best to tell your parents when you are alone with them. Don't try and do some fancy dinner or anything like that, just get them alone and tell them, and be serious. If for one second they think you're not taking it seriously then they'll tear you down. Stand your ground and tell them this is your decision. It might be easier to just go ahead and fill your FAFSA for the first year as a dependent under your parents, then get married. I was a couch surfer in high school and when I filled my FAFSA independently, it was SO MUCH TROUBLE that I just filled as a dependent. They really ask for so much information that you might not even get your school covered until months into the semester and could risk being dropped from your classes (please trust me on this, I battled financial aid for 4 years). FILL OUT YOUR FAFSA ON MARCH 1st and have everything turned in and settled by June. Once you turn in FAFSA, that's not it, they will keep asking you for stuff, and keep asking and it can drag on months and months, that's why it's important to do it early. Make sure you fill taxes early too because the sooner that's done, the sooner you can fill out FAFSA. Had many friends wait and FAFSA kept asking for different things and go dropped from their classes and go in trouble for not paying and it's just one big headache and affects your classes. Hope this helps all aspects of your question!

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  • Sit down and tell your parents just how you did for anything before. Maybe have his parents there to ease the tension and tell why they support it.

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