Would you rather marry if you can keep your last name?

Old fashioned way: It used to be that as a woman you automatically got the last name of your husband.

Revolution 1: Then you automatically got to keep your last name, but it was put behind the last name of your husband and a '-' , to show you are married.

Revolution 2: Recently, you automatically keep your last name.

You have always been able to change your last name in a different way. Say during revolution 1, if you wanted to ditch your own last name, you could, but you had to fill out a form and explain why you wanted that and apply for it. Also if your husband wanted to ditch his last name and get yours, it was possible, but only if you explained and applied for it.
The same options are still available since revolution 2 started, but it just means more paperwork for those who prefered revolution 1 or the old fashioned way.

What do you think about the 2nd revolution? Is it better or worse that way?
I'm not sure why they changed the rules. Did they do it because most women just want to keep their last name nowadays and there'd be less paperwork to do and thus make marriage more attractive (passports, drivers licence and other official documents need not to be replaced) or did they do it to make marriage less attractive and indistinguishable from long-term partnerships on paper?

*** I know in some countries, it's commong that the wife always gets to keep her last name and the children have a double last name or a different last name than one of the parents. Does anybody know what their reasons were?

  • I'd rather ditch my last name. / For men: I'd rather she ditched her last name.
    38% (12)55% (6)42% (18)Vote
  • I'd rather have two last names. / For men: I'd rather she had two last names.
    19% (6)18% (2)19% (8)Vote
  • I'd rather keep my last name. / For men: I'd rather she kept her last name.
    43% (14)27% (3)39% (17)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't care for marriage, but I'd go through with marriage if she really wanted to.
    If we did get married I don't care what she does with her last name.

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    • Do you care if your children have your last name or hers?

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    • @junikey I see it as just legal documents. x_x

    • I think if you really love someone, you stick together. No need for a government to butt into our relation and "approve" of our love.

Most Helpful Girl

  • In the UK I thought nothing changed officially until you went and changed it by deed poll. At which point you can change it to whatever you feel like.

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    • But I'd opt to keep my last name. It's my name, I don't need a new one. I'm not a different person and I don't think it's fair I should abandon my families name because I got married. It isn't like it used to be, I'm not property to be handed to a new owner.

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    • Thanks for the mho :)

    • Thank you too ^^ I learnt something new

What Guys Said 10

  • I'll be keeping my last name no matter what and I prefer the old fashioned way it's just simpler, though if she wants to keep her last name I won't stop her. My children for sure though will be taking my last name as I am literally the only man in my family who can carry the family name on for other generations if I have a son.

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    • what if she's also an only child?

    • and wants her family name to be carried on too?

    • Well I plan on having 2 children, 3 if the first 2 turn out ok so I don't mind if she names one after her family, but the son will still named after mine.

  • I voted C, I think marriage is an outdated institution to begin with. You can have traditional, long term relationships without the legal complications of marriage. As far as the children are concerned, The last name of the father should be used for practical reasons. I think historically and even today, people always want to know who the father is, since the mother is kind of obvious. There never is a question of who the child's mother is since they are the one's who give birth. As far as the hybrid last names go concerning children, it will just end up being crazy down the line. If smith-henderson marries hallohan-rodriguez, and then they have a child, how do you handle their last name? Smith-henderson-hallohan-rodriguez? Or would you just pick one last name from each side? I think history has less to do with the "Patriarchy" and more to do with what was practical and worked at the time. Most names are occupational in origin to begin with, so they literally named someone by what they could do.

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    • Well, over here, I think the kids just had the last name of the father and it's just the mother having two surnames.
      In latin america, people all have two last names from their parents and keep them when they marry. the kids will only take over the first last names of both parents.

    • Ok didn't know that about latin america

  • I don't care, I even may take her last name given that I wanna stay in the US and an American last name will suit better with American first names for my kids. Sure, my full name would sound a little weird, but at least my kids' sound better.

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  • I think it has become the norm to do option 3

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  • I don't demand much from a marriage partner, but one of them is that she's taking my last name. If she doesn't want to be part of my family, we won't get married.

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  • Not sure what I want.

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  • I actually wanted her name.

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  • I don't really care for names. It's supposed to be about us, not our names.

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  • I wouldn't marry her, that simple.

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  • I don't want my wife to add my surname to her name.

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    • If she adopts my surname and I don't adopt hers - it looks like as if she is my slave. I don't want to add any new surname to my name and therefore I want my wife to not to adopt my surname.

    • It's strange to me that people would think adopting a name is equal to slavery. But I can understand your logic. Thanks for explaining ^^

What Girls Said 11

  • In Korea the woman never takes the man's last name so my husband was really happy that I took his name when we married. It was important to me that our kids shared a last name with both of us. And to me it has no bearing on who's more important or not in the relationship.

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    • Yeah, I never saw it as a sign that someone was more important than the other, but sharing the last name as your kids. I remember reading about Italians doing the same thing and kids having to explain why the mother has a different surname than them to foreigners.
      Do the Korean children get the surname of the father or the mother?

    • They take the father's surname :)

    • Learn something new from you bellegirl everyday

  • I don't want to get married but if I did I'm keeping my name no matter what. He can pull up his boy panties and suck it up

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  • I am very traditional. I would only keep my last name if there wasn't any boys in my generation to pass the last name down.

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  • I'm going to marry anyway. And I will be keeping my surname because Islam gives me that right

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  • hmmm... i think i want to keep my last name and take his name.

    so... FirstName MiddleName OriginalLastName NewLastName

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  • I chose to take his. He didn't ask me to.

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  • I prefer to keep my lAst name

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  • I'd be okay with A and B

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  • I'm definitely going to keep my own name, but I think I'd want to have his last name too so B

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  • I hate my last name, so ditch it.

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  • I'd like to keep my surname, it's who I am.

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