Why do people like big weddings, so much?

I'm just curious, my cousin graduated college this weekend and had two parties. At both parties there were an engaged people. First, is her best friend who is getting married (an arranged marriage). Second, is her cousin from her dad's side of the family. He's marrying some girl she went high school with and doesn't like.

Anyway, they were both talking about there weddings and how many people were going to be there and etc etc. I was just thinking how much work that is for one day and a lot of money to spend for one day. I have a cousin who got married, I was in her wedding and they spent a TON of money on it. Only to divorce how ever many years later. However, my parents had a small wedding and have been married for 37 years.

I just veiw the wedding as my way to get married but my main focus is on the marriage not the wedding. The wedding is one day and the marriage is (hopefully) forever, so why not focus on that? Why put so much time, money and thought into one day of your lives? What's the point?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • me and my fiancee both dont want a big wedding she grew up very wealthy and all the weddings she was around were big and she says they are overatted and to much of a hassle. and she also works at a lot of weddings as a makeup artist and says the brides at big weddings can be kind of annoying. so we both agreed on a medium sized wedding not to big and not to small. we are both fairly young im 24 and she's 22 and we both dont have a lot of money i work at a comic book store and she's a makeup artist and for our wedding its my family helping pay for it and we are both going to help pay for it since her family has cut her off finacially and has told us they won't fund one cent of the wedding. we are also saving up to buy our first house and she wants to open up her own beauty salon and i want to either go back to school next fall or become a bartender so we won't have the wedding until two or three years from now

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What Guys Said 10

  • Well I don't think either way it wrong particularly, if you love each other and the people you care about accept it then simple is fine, that being said I can understand why some would want a big wedding, its a celebration of two people being together after all so that isn't a bad thing, and you can make some hopefully very nice memories. It depends on how you look at it really.

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  • personally i consider it "waste of money" :-(

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  • To some women it's all about those facebook likes

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  • Some people want a big wedding, because they want a large celebration for a pivotal life moment.

    If there can be parties for birthdays, graduations, anniversaries, etc... why not throw a party for marriage?

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  • Because they are narcissists or have really large families and don't have a choice if they want their family there.

    But it's mostly just narcissists...

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  • If people want to be that dumb, whatever, but I'll definitely go and take their money via free drinks and food. I knew a couple that spent 80k on a wedding and the bride wasn't even happy about any of it because it didn't go exactly as planned. She was like a bridezilla. Total bitch who had no means of appreciating the moment,

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  • I am with you on this. I really can't understand the point of having a big expensive wedding. I hope my future SO has the same thought, otherwise, I'd be screwed.

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  • I think big weddings are so stupid. There are so many things I'd rather spend thousands of dollars on than a wedding

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  • Because throwing a big party can feel good. It's personal preference basically.

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  • Over inflated sense of self importance.

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What Girls Said 4

  • A wedding is essentially a big party. People like to have big weddings for the status that it will bring ("did you hear Susan had 600 people at her wedding? I can't believe how much money they have!") but that's a waste of time and money in my opinion. There are some cultural influences to having a big wedding as well, but really it's about status. I'm not sure if there's a correlation between wedding size and marriage length. My parents had a big Italian wedding and have been married 30 years.

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  • I'm having a huge wedding because my fiancĂ© has a huge family and didn't really have a choice. Yes I am spending way too much but in order to get all our family and friends it has to be big.

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    • and what's wrong with doing it at the courthouse with a few really close friends/family members?

    • He's Italian... Lol that shit won't fly.

  • It was the same way for me when I was at school; everybody were eating and marrying.

    What really matters is what the idea is that you put focus to in this celebration. I can't quite remember but I think there was a civilization that before going out to hunt game to ensure good luck they would throw a huge outing like the party you mentioned.

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    • So if you got a good idea going into it, then GREAT!!! Remember it's the thought that counts, and lavish weddings are no exception.

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    • I'm not saying weddings are bad; it's the mindset.
      1 Samuel 16:7New King James Version (NKJV)

      7 "... For the Lord does not see as man sees;[a] for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

    • AND I'm not advocating to memorize the Bible word for word. Yes God is true, but it rather would be better to have this written in your heart than to memorize word for word. The power of the Word comes from where there is life, not from ritualistic patterns, in MY opinion.

  • Because people can be really flashy and kinda lose the whole idea of marriage.

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