What can I do to not leave my husband and kids?

I've been married for 5 years now. I have two kids and every single time after delivery I have depression. I feel like I'm tied down and there is no escape. I love my kids but they overwhelm me and as a result I don't interact as much aside from keeping them fed, changed and putting them in bed. I've been with my husband since I was 15, even though we broke up 3 times I still didn't date anyone else. I don't know if I want a new more or just want freedom from the kids. I feel bad thinking this way because most mothers are so loving. I've always been a free spirit but I think that even if I was to leave, I couldn't find a guy as I'm 29. So in all I have to stay, I just haven't figured out how to want this married parent life


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You are suffering from depression. You need to see a professional. Find a counselor of some sort to work with this. And a doctor can prescribe anti-depressants. The cances are very good that you will be able to find a way to feel better about your life and really enjoy your family.

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    • This ^^

      Asker, you need to seek some help. There's no shame in not being able to cope, it doesn't make you a bad mother. The fact you want to connect with them shows us that. You just need a helping hand to show you the way through. Speak to your husband too, I'm sure it would break his heart to know how alone you're feeling.

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    • Agree with all points made by Red_Arrow here.

    • This is something that is very important to BOTH of you. I would suggest that you discuss this, including your plans to fix things, with your husband and take him to your medical appointments relating to depression. If there are areas where you feel the need to discuss things without him in the room, arrange in advance that he will let you have that privacy, but have him with you for other areas. And find a counselor for couples that will work with the two of you to find ways that you will feel the support of your husband and the love of your children. And will help you with solutions for your special time alone with your husband.

What Guys Said 4

  • You can find people to talk to through a GP. Your not alone as many women feel this way after childbirth. If u did leave then 29 isn't old you could find somebody and not have more kids and just enjoy life with them free from the worries. Just keep seeing your kids though be in their lives don't just walk away and abandon them

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  • this site is rich with information and tools. Go here and read. There is a LOT of information and advice. Spend some time, the navigation of the site isn't obvious but the information is worth it. It gives a lot of tools, articles, and discussion on working through problems like yours.
    www.marriagebuilders.com

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  • It sounds like you're suffering form postpartum depression. It's not uncommon, but I'd advise you to go see a therapist to help you deal with it.

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  • You should probably be on some anti depressants

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What Girls Said 4

  • Have you thought about talking to a professional? Sometimes depression can make people feel this way (not want to interact with other people, even their loved ones such as children). I think you should probably try to figure out WHY you are feeling this way and then work to resolve the issues. Talk to your husband about it so he knows where your mind is at, consider going to therapy by yourself at first and then later on maybe both of you could go.

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    • I think I feel this way because I was told I could never have kids and I was really happy about that. I also wanted to date and not get married and if I did it would be late in life. I have not been able to produce enough milk with either child, so I'm attached to a breast pump every 2 hours, 7 times a day for 20 minutes.

  • If you want you can inbox me i don't want to put my whole life out there. I will not judge you but there are things that we go threw and don't want to share with everyone.

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  • You need to find a therapist. You might be suffering from Postpartum Depression.

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  • you can leave if you want to.

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    • I come from a household where my dad was nonexistent. As a child it sucks so I don't want my kids to go through that

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