How do I get out of an Arranged Marriage?

I'm turning 18 soon and I'm arranged to marry this girl that's two months younger than me. The wedding is planned and both our parents agreed from when we were children.

We met the other day in secret to talk. She's quite pretty but we both agreed we don't want to get married right now. We both like eachother but she wants to finish school and become a doctor.
But if we get married she can't because she's going to live in my house.

We don't want to shame our parents. We will have our own house in a year, just me and her but that's not enough time for her to finish her exams. I want her to finish her studies. But I'll be preoccupied with mine.

What do I do? I'm hoping my parents will agree to postpone the wedding for a year.


0|0
3|3

Most Helpful Guy

  • This is a case of where you're asking Westerners with Western ideals on how to deal with a situation that is pretty much totally alien for most people on this site. The only advice you'll get here will come from people who will tell you rehashed versions of the "this isn't right; this isn't fair; you should only marry whom you love; etc etc".

    Dude I dunno what you should do since I don't know what's acceptable in your culture. Can you talk to your parents about this? Can you postpone the marriage to a few years later?

    0|0
    0|0
    • I can try to postpone in but her father has already paid for the venue and our house isn't complete yet.

What Girls Said 3

  • i know that arranged marriage is existant within some cultures but it all up to you... like if you accept you will honour your parents and accept to be unhappy or if you don't accept you will dishonour your family and will be happy

    0|0
    0|0
  • talk to your parents, personally im not a fan of this kind of marriages, but
    I respect your way of things. and if you have to marry right away, why can't she study in your house?

    0|0
    0|0
    • She'll live with me and my parents until my house is finished being built.

    • Ah I understand, can't she study while she lives with ur parents? Im living in a very different culture im sorry

  • What country do you live in?

    0|0
    0|0
    • I'm in the UK studying but this is all happening in back in Asia.

    • I'm not sure what to say then.

What Guys Said 2

  • I bet you can persuade you parents to postpone the wedding. You talk to yours, she talks to hers. If you wanted to drop the thing all together, it would be tricky, but postponing seems possible to me. Go with "i'm gonna marry her eventually, but not right now. Please, give me at least one year. I'm not ready."

    0|0
    0|0
    • Ok I'll try that thank you!

  • You are really too young for a huge commitment like this... I agree , you both need to lay the foundations for both your futures... you need to tell this to both your parents !!

    0|0
    0|0
    • They're both ol fashioned, they don't understand that times have changed.

Loading...