Why do you want to get married?

We were talking about this is my Marriage and Relationships class. And I never thought about... I mean what's the real appeal of getting married? I mean if you really love someone then why would getting legally married matter anyhow? You could still move in together. You could still have kids. So what's the point really?

Updates:
Just for the record, I'm not saying don't get married. I'm just curious to see why you would feel the need to.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's really not that important when you think about it, but I'd wanna get married because of these reasons:

    • I want the whole family to have the same last name.
    • It's special, it's like sealing the deal, most people have multiple relationships in their lifetime, but only marry one person (if it works out... at least usually the intention is to stay married to that one person). Just knowing for sure that that person wants to spend the rest of their life with you and only you. It's a huge commitment.
    • Weddings are so cute! ♡
    • Lol, I don't have any more reasons.

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    • Oh, and I also wanna prove my mother and sister wrong, cause they've always said I'm gonna be forever alone and that I'll never get married :P

Most Helpful Guy

  • How the world's right now, I don't feel like wanting to get married. Like you said, we can do the same thing we'd do if we were married, but without being married. Marriage is just like a contract. There's some benefits from the government, state or whatever, but those aren't worth it compared to the negatives.

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    • Yeah, that's what I was thinking too. There seems to be more cons than pros.

What Girls Said 14

  • I think marriage bonds two people together in a way so that they can't easily run away. Beyond the societal responsibilities and expectations one has towards their spouse. There's a legal bond two people share.

    I understand if people don't want to get married, it's their life. But I would want to marry the man I love because I want to formally solidify our bond and legally share the benefits married couples share.

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  • I got married because I wanted to spend my life with my husband, grow old with him, be the person who had his back and know that he had mine. Those are the reasons I wanted to "marry" him meaning make a lifelong, public commitment. Why make it legal? So whichever of us lived longer would have automatic, tax-free inheritance rights. So that one of us would have legal standing with doctors/hospitals if the other was incapacitated. So I could put him on my health insurance. So he would have automatic legal paternity for any children we had without having to file with the courts. Gay marriage proponents used to publish a long list of legal rights married couples had that gay couples either couldn't get or had to specifically hire a lawyer to help them establish; we wanted a lot of those legal connections. And, frankly, we liked having the additional hurdle to breaking up.

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    • Yes, that's one of the major pros of marriage, in my opinion is being able to have a say to what happens to your spouse if something happens. Thanks for bringing that up

  • I'd be cementing a life-long bond in a traditional loving ritual as well as legally. This is me.

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  • Oh, that's easy, I don't.

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  • Yes, you could still do everything without making it legal. But let's look at this. Divorce is expensive and often painful. Telling someone you are willing to take a chance on them is what marriage is about. It's the commitment and leap of faith. Cause without the legality you can walk away whenever you want without having to put up with the horribleNess of divorce.

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  • Many cultures and/or families look down on those who live together and have families but aren't legally married. Most people get married because its the social norm. It is also a way to show your significant other that you will remain faithful to them (but that does not apply to everyone since people cheat in committed relationship often) To others it is good for tax benefits and shared health care.
    Personally my family would never let me move in with a guy and start a family without us being married. It not what we do in our culture, if I did that then it would probably be shameful. They also would worry that my significant other could just leave me whenever they wanted without the mess of a divorce.

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  • I feel this way too. Marriage is just a signed paper. It doesn't change anything.

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  • Wait, you take classes in a subject called "Marriage and Relationships" ? 😂

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  • Because I love my boyfriend and want to spend my life with him, marriage is just logical to me (please note, I am a Christian so it's something I've always believed in)

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  • I would just prefer to get married, I don't really have a valid reason lol and it doesn't change anything. It's not of huge importance to me though and it really doesn't and wouldn't change anything, just a preference in my case at least.

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  • Marriage is not a goal in my life, becuz I honestly don't believe in love.

    I'm going to focus all my energy on my career and hobbies, than a man who most likely, won't appreciate me

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  • I honestly dont want to live together until we're at least engaged. I also dont want to have sex or children with him until we're actually married

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  • I honestly think the pros outweigh the cons.

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  • people nowadays ruined marriage

    premarital sex
    living together without marriage
    TONS of relationships = tons of heartbreak
    having kids without marriage

    pretty much doing everything that you only get through marriage... before marriage and that's why the younger generations don;t see the point or are like "oh i dont want to get married" well you are pretty much doing everything marriage-related

    and the conseuences are pretty clear... it's sad really

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What Guys Said 5

  • Well, considering it's ceremonial in nature, marriage is used to make a public declaration of your love for someone and pledging to be with them forever. It's almost like making an oath. Just moving in and living together is easy and has no strings attached. You can slip in and out whenever you want. To me, that's not appealing. By getting married, it's like swearing an oath to each other to be with each other for the rest of your lives no matter how hard things get and to publicly declare it. It's a sign of commitment and how seriously you take the relationship. It's also an opportunity to celebrate with those you're close to and love this new step in your life. It's also a sign to others that this person is taken as they have used the most recognized symbol of commitment to another person. If someone's just living with someone else, there's never really a demonstrated sign of dedication and commitment. Mainly because they can come and go in the relationship whenever they want. There's no obligation to stay if there's no marriage. To me, that's too much freedom in a relationship. When I'm married, I've pledged to stay with someone forever. I'm giving up part of my freedom as a sign of my love and devotion to another human being. It's part of being selfless. Really, marriage is a symbolic demonstration of two people's unrequited love for each other and the ultimate sign of self-sacrifice and selflessness that a couple can go through other than having kids.

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  • Cause l fall in love hard! And I'm a better person when im with a girl i love

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  • I don't believe in marriage at all - I would cohabit and have kids outside marriage

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  • because family is my end game before death and God.

    you grow, build yourself and serve and raise your children and love your wife. its extreemly fullfiliing and i know it. its part of a purpose driven life. its part of happiness and joy.

    its design of life. its natural and were built for family as we are built for community.

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  • I want to get married because that is why God made guys and girls to live that way! He wants us to enjoy sex within' marriage. I want to have kids, I want to kiss my beautiful girl, I want to take baths and showers with her, and I want to spend the rest of my life with her! God made sex for men and women to enjoy when they're married! I can't have sex with my girlfriend until I marry her. But first, Jesus has to send the right girl to me.

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