What is the point of a Bachelors/Bachelorette party?

I'm getting married soon. And here in the UK they're terribly common. Where I'm from not so much.

So my fiance recently asked what I was gonna do for me "Hens night" and I was like "what? " I wasn't planning on doing one because I don't see the point?
Then he asked if I mind if he has one. And well it's not the end of the world, I recongnize it's some kind of tradition but you know so was burning people alive for a while, so I said I don't see the point?

If he wants to go out with his friends he can do that any night from now until he dies, so what's so special about that one night?
He said it's about celebrating your last night "in freedom" because marriage is lifelong imprisonment? I really don't understand. I think it's stupid. Maybe it had it's place when people got married in their teens and not getting married was not an option, but times have changed. If he wants to live "in freedom" he can. But he choose no to. So I don't know it's a really weird concept


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You have conflicting opinions about it. If he can go out anytime he wants, why not let him celebrate this tradition, where his friends can roast him and jest at his expense, people can try and tempt him, he can indulge in things (like dance with other women) that he doesn't normally do, in order to experience how he feels.
    You don't want to risk him into a marriage that turns out to be a mistake, do you? I believe the purpose of the event is to test their convictions, that they really and truly and deeply want this marriage, that they have thought about it fully, and then they are willing and able to commit with a concrete mind.
    Marriage is forever, so let him go through this rite of passage and survive to find you on the other end.

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    • I don't have conflicting opinions about it. I don't have a problem with him going out in general. But I don't see a need for the last one before getting married to be such a big deal, with stupid games, annoying stranger and all that stuff

    • That's conflicting opinions. He can go out whenever he wants, but not now, not at this time when it is generally expected in his culture

    • It's not so much that he is going out but what people typically do on bachelors nights

Most Helpful Girl

  • I am not sure what's in Store and More in the UK, but in the USA, there is what is referred to as "Jack and Jill " parties. This a Huge party for all of YOUR FRIENDS AND HIS, Family too, where everyone brings a gift for Both of you, or there is a price per person or couple taken at the door, so they can both go shopping at the store.
    You BOTH partake, and I feel with This, it is Not A... Hit or Miss.
    I am hearing More and more about the "Jack and Jill" deal, instead of the separate boring His and Her parties, that may soon, who Knows... Be outdated.
    Good luck, throw it his way today. xxoo

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What Guys Said 6

  • It's common, but I find it horsehockey. I would not throw a bachelor party. I look at my lonely bachelor life as the "imprisonment," if anything. The only difference is I don't have a set bed time and I don't have to concede my agenda to pander to a bunch of little kids and a dog. I hated living at home, because I felt like a slave.

    It's the difference sometimes between feeling like a slave, and feeling like the lonely governor marooned on a tropical island. The latter is better... but not by much.

    I see getting a wife as the rise in social status. A sign that I'm moving up in life like I'm supposed to. And doing something with my life.

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  • it's just a ceremonial last night of "freedom". Of course that's not the reality since you have a partner so you can't do (or shouldn't do) whatever you want and even after marriage you can still go out.

    for me it was more of a celebration of going from unmarried to married. Just a bunch of my friends doing a special outing.

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  • If i was getting marred i wouldn't have a Bachelors party instead I would have a party with just my bride to be like 3-5 days before the wedding cause you can't see the bride the day of the wedding until you marry her.

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  • lol strippers! Nah he is just going out for drinks and to have a blast. I would think it would be more for celebrating with his buds for getting married

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  • a lot of women focus on the issue of what's the point like you do. It is different because of the entertainment and even if you go out every night it usually doesn't involve 30-50 friends. More importantly I have always known the primary reason to be to raise money for the wedding. You sell tickets to the event, have raffles, gambling, cash bar, etc. All of these a portion of the money collected goes to the groom for the wedding. So if you can look past the jealous feeling you may have about there being girls present and trust your man the result could really benefit you.

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    • I never said I was jealous, I just really don't see the point. It doesn't make any sense to me. Don't just assume stuff , so typical

      Anyways I've never of anyone go out of there with a profit. Where are you from? I'm sure it's not customary here

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    • If he can go out any night then this should not be an issue - well that's the point, why make this one so special?
      I don't get the whole idea of celebrating "the last night of freedom", because of what I said the original question

      I didn't mean to come across jealous, what did I say that made you think that?

    • Just the fact that it's an issue. If he can go out any night then him wanting to make it a special night shouldn't be a problem yet your post suggests it is since you are asking the question. Think of it like a bridal shower. The bridal shower is getting all your friends together to celebrate the marriage. This is his version basically.

  • It's not a way to say marriage is a lifelong imprisonment, just think of it as one of the last rights of passage a man takes in his life.

    It didn't begin with people saying "last night of freedom" the original saying would be closer to "last night as a single man" because in the days where it originated people didn't date, they just got married.

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What Girls Said 1

  • An excuse to party with your friends, in my opinion. When people are about to be married, they aren't really "single" and haven't been for quite a while.

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