Why would any man ever get married?

I mean, honestly, she'll just cheat on you and sleep with someone else anyway, probably one of your best friends, why bother getting married, it's just a waste of time and you always wind up alone, fucked up, and told how it's all your fault anyway.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Lol I would be more concerned with what kind of shitty ass friends you have.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's becoming a lot more common for guys to not be interested in marriage. There's really not anything a guy gets in a marriage that he can't get in a relationship. Hell, considering how often girls fall in love with their fuckbuddies, there's really not anything you get from a relationship that you can't get from being friends with benefits.

    Marriage doesn't garantee love, happiness, loyalty, or even frequent sex. The only thing it garantees is that the higher earner is most likely going to be paying the lower earner lots of money. 💸

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What Girls Said 80

  • As you are under 18, I think your understanding of the world is extremely vague.

    One day you are going to meet a woman so good you won't want to imagine life without her. (Don't bother saying you won't because you will!).

    People who marry and cheat and have affairs have something missing in their marriage or their life. Sometimes they are just self centered people who want 'more'.

    So you know though you won't be able to sleep with all of her friends if she cheats on you because we find it gross and we are also loyal creatures and by the age we are married our friends are friends for life.

    The divorce thing, I am divorced. He cheated on me. Did I fleece him? No. We split everything after a discussion and that was that. A very amicable divorce.

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    • No one knows the future but At the same time I would not be so quick to assume he'll meet someone and fall in love because there are men in their 30s on this website who are single and virgins :o

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    • @MimTcgraw I don't know it depends on the woman

    • I'm sorry but a 30 yr old male virgin is probably the king of World of Warcraft or Call of Duty you know what I mean? I might be the closest version of a 30 yr old virgin that I know! that's because I've only had 5 partners in my life... and 4 of those were just little flings.

  • I could change Man to Woman and say the same things. It just seems like there are a lot of people out there who want nothing more than to hurt other people.

    I'm sorry for whatever happened to you. I'm hurting right now too. It's okay to hurt, People are assholes. Just know that not all of us are like that. But unfortunately the few bad ones ruin the bunch :(

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    • This is probably the best comment. I like it when people handle things maturely and not just lash out at said angry poster. Two wrongs never make a right and respect to you for being neutral! :]

    • @Calex Thanks! :) I'm glad you liked my answer. It's hard when you're hurting, I know I'm going through it now. Both genders do hurtful things to one another. There are bad women and bad men out there. People make idiotic decisions all the time which hurt other people.

    • Yes, and what we can do is be good role models and show that people can be better! :]

  • Yeah, we women are just evil, shallow human beings who is only interested in sex and money. Better keep yourself away from us before your wallet is empty and life is ruined...

    Ugh, i see stupid posts like this every day. Stay single if you want to, no one forces you to marry.

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    • You're pissed because you know I'm right

    • I'm pissed of because i'm a girl and i know the female gender better then you lol

  • uh huh. who taught u that? #generalisation308

    remember this: anything happening in your life does not define the way the world works.

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    • Umm yes it does. I've learned growing up that all people are selfish in some shape or form. God doesn't exist, the universe is meaningless, corruption dominates the world, looks mean everything, humans are controlled by instincts and love is a chemical reaction. In the end all is meaningless atoms.

      My child Anna you will learn just how much life sucks when you become elite 30. At 30 you just know that life is crap. Enjoy the 20s while you can my child.

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    • @Aeon_Flux_21 . I can also cook and bake I can play the renaissance lute, classical guitar, acoustic archtop guitar, solid-body electric guitar, electric bass guitar, bluegrass mandolin or f-style mandolin, A-style mandolin, electric frypan steel guitar, lap steel guitar, pedalsteel guitar, sitar, violin, viola, cello, double bass, petite grand piano, baby grand piano, medium grand piano, parlor grand piano, semiconcert or ballroom piano, concert grand piano, church organ, chamber organ, theatre organ, electric organ, harpsichord, hurdy gurdy, hammered dulcimer, the psaltery, drums, bladder pipe, bag pipes, recorder, trumpet etc.

    • @Aeon_Flux_21 Now tell me how everyones life sucks because your life does

  • Wow, such faith in commitment and humanity. Not all women cheat, not all men end up alone 'fucked up' and told it's their fault.
    Yes, it happens. But not to everyone. It's pretty degrading for you to say all women have commitment issues actually. And rude.
    maybe you've had some bad experiences and seen this happen but this isn't the only way marriages pan out.

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  • While I personally don't agree with the concept of marriage, your bitter whiny generalisations are both unnecessary and false.

    www.statisticbrain.com/infidelity-statistics/

    Well would you look at that, men cheat too! 😮
    Or are you gonna deny that and carry on slating a whole gender, when both sides are just as guulty?

    Because no man in the history of human kind has ever screwed over a woman. Nope. Never happened.

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  • You, sir, are more than welcome to stay unmarried.

    MY man, however, will be getting hitched. To me. 'Cause I'm not a snake.

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  • if you wanna stay single its all up to you but to each his own

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    • Not married =/= single

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    • Like Frank said, I would defend their right to free speech if I thought it was in jeopardy
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJaLrINeZPc

    • Kid, you don't need to be married for someone to cheat on you or take half your stuff.

      By law, anyone in a common-law relationship is recognized as the equivalent of being married. After one year of living with your girl/boyfriend (you might be gay, considering how you spazz in your messages), the government recognizes the two of you as common-law. Common law couples can file for a joint tax return and receive all the benefits that married couples do. Should she/he leave you, they also have the right to take half of the assets in the relationship.

      So your opinion that only a married couple is exposed to the risk of splitting their finances and assets is wrong.

  • Gr8 b8 m8.

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  • Yeah, you should never get married. Turn celibate and make sure you don't fucking breed. For Christ's sake, don't breed!

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    • Haha, that's all you guys can ever do, insult, you can't even debate me

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    • @Calex that might be your take, this is mine.

      Why would anyone get married?

      Why would any man get married?

      Tell me that isn't a a dig at women...

    • It could also just be him speaking on the fact that he's male, and asking other males why they should as he can relate to them?

      I honestly don't know.

  • And the same goes for girls too, GUYS CHEAT as well, in case you aren't aware of this.

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    • Only the sucky ones. Many guys ( including myself) are loyal to a fault

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    • Sounds like you are part of the problem

    • @Kirah not the ones when I grew up in. And, not all divorce will lead it to become a court case..

  • You should definitely stay single, honestly

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    • Yet another ad hominem attack in the absence of proof or logic

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    • Two wrongs don't make a right :]
      Everyone is a contributor to society!

    • @Calex No not everyone is. Ask Dick Cheney.

  • ... I'm married and my husband loves being married to me. Neither of us have ever cheated on anyone and we're attached at the hip always.

    Don't be a negative nancy!

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  • Well I guess according to you, all guys are perfect angels who don't cheat on their spouses as well. Yeah, okay.

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    • Nope, not at all, however, males tend to have a stronger sense of loyalty, they're like dogs, honestly, hell, studies show that cheating and break-ups have a far worse effect on men than it does women. That's not even an anecdotes, that's a statistic, so, yeah...

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    • And just because I was fucked over by one guy, doesn't give me the odacity to date all men.

    • hate* stupid autocorrect

  • Here we go again 😂

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  • Bitter male syndrome.

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    • Lol he's downvoting everyone 😂👏

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    • Lol! Yes @Bards! Yes!

    • I don't talk to you as much as I would like Bards, but you're my hero lmao

  • It all depends on the person.
    You're so little... you'll figure it out later in life, little buddy. =)

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  • This is why the bible talks about not staring at wine when it is red and glowing in the cup. You saw passion and beauty and based on that you came to the conclusion that this woman can make you happy and she didn't. In order to find true happiness, you have to base your romantic choices on character and not on the physical attractiveness of the person you are dating. Men base their choices exclusively on looks and then complain when the girl has a bad personality.

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    • I also pay attention to first impressions, and whether or not she'll give me the time of day. And to what extent. And I slowly try to get to know her.

      But when they're in some type of trouble, my rescue instincts tend to cloud my judgment. A woman who is a true con artist doesn't have to look like a supermodel to become a master of manipulation.

    • I never looked at it that way before, but you have a good point.

  • Let people do what they want, no one is forcing you to get married or date or have anything to do with females... and from the sounds of it no one will ever want you to haha

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    • You say "ever" as if 10, 20 or even 30 years later he'll never get married. He's just a kid! You shouldn't say harsh things like that to kids.

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    • Well, hey, they're all traitors anyway, every human will betray you eventually, which is why you have to betray them first

    • yeah okay junior

  • Lmao aww poor guy

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  • For companionship, not everyone is completely dishonest, and you're under 18 so a teen, and well its ok to not want to or feel like you have to... just let girls know when you date them.

    Now people are so obnoxious online and assume everyone on here is adults, but in reality you are young and things hurt more when you're but the world gets bigger and there's more people. You also dont have to get married anyway

    Y

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  • first i totally disagree... there is nothing like that... we girls ve that mentality for u n u ve that mentality for us so its better u find someone u can place ur trust in n settle down with... its a feeling that comes automatically... u dont do anything about it... there will be someone who will fit perfectly in ur life... u need someone to grow old with... ur parents, friends n kids will all leave u n all u r left with is that better half... so stop being so general coz we r all different... i know both girls n guys on either side... we all can't be on one side... its against the law of nature... if there is good then there is bad... u need to stop being so judgy n find ur good... maybe u ve seen people around u or ur experience of girls fucking up well maybe try looking at the brighter side... someone is there for staying... i know many keepers n players so please ve a broad mind n look for the right one... even if she does cheat ur work is to place ur trust in them n if they break it they bear the consequences... just do urself a favour n dont be judgy

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  • you're so young to be so bitter 😞

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  • Good point. I kinda feel the same way about men.

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  • Saying all women cheat and have no commitment is like saying all men cheat and have no commitment, neither is true as you can't judge every man or women by the few you have met, same goes for me. I was just cheated on and dumped by a MAN I didn't cheat, sleep with anyone or anything. I think you're over reacting and need to keep opinions like this to yourself.
    Maybe you have just been hurt by a women, maybe you've been hurt by more than one... Well that says more about your choice and preference than it does every women.
    Blaming women for whatever caused you to think like this just shows immaturity and single mindedness, its sad really.

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  • The only real difference between a marriage and a committed relationship is the legal paperwork and those societal benefits which come with. Unmarried couples can and at times do throw a party to share their love with others (a wedding), live together, support each other financially, and have/raise children. BUT, like most things, the greatest effect getting officially married has on a relationship is its mental and social influences - for many, getting married means being a part of their society, culture, and tradition, rather than distancing themselves from it, which is instinctively important for pack animals. Being raised with the idea that finding "the one" is when you get married, which is considered an achievement in life that people respect, appreciate, and get excited about is also why we grow up to see and treat it that way. Additionally, getting married is BIG ego fuel - It is a period in your life ALL ABOUT YOU AND YOUR LOVE (the greatest thing in your life if you are in fact in love). From the day you announce your engagement until you return from your honeymoon, everyone in your life, even those you haven't seen in years, suddenly and continually showers you with attention, compliments, and gifts - you become "the popular kids" on everyone's minds and lips. Finally, because not getting married equates to going against the norm, in both your mind and others, you become/are both a deserter and a rebel. In both your mind and others, the question as to WHY pops up again and again. Just as you may feel like an outsider for your choice not to follow a societal/cultural norm, many others will see you that was as well, and even value and treat you differently. Often, people are less supportive of your relationship, and especially your choice to have any children out of wedlock. Worst part is when you become judged by these people in a negative way, because they feel you have judged them and their societal/cultural traditions. So, for all these reasons, it is actually easier to get married than to just be in a committed relationship. BUT, legally, a marriage is harder and more expensive to end. Regardless as to whether your marriage lasts or ends in divorce, it is not the marriage itself that is to blame/give credit to. Any relationship takes effort and desire to make it work. Should a couple loose that mutual effort and desire, it won't matter if you are married or not, your relationship begins to crumble and break. Love is the key!

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    • As for your view of marriage as a waste of time… marriage is merely a form of expression, but not the only option. All of our choices/actions are external expressions of who we are inside. Our choices/actions share our opinions, views, values, beliefs, fears, desires, distastes, … with others, revealing our inner world to our outer world as well as shaping and reshaping our outer world to better reflect our inner world. Your attitude towards marriage is personal, but that attitude affects your life - how you navigate and whose company you take/keep. Just remember, anyone's view on marriage is merely an opinion. No one's decision to or not to wed is purely based in fact. So, there is no true right or wrong when it comes to the decision to marry. Just do what is, in your own opinion, right for you. "It is how you choose to see it, and how you choose to see it is how you treat it."

  • Asker let me give you some advice about dating. Not all relationships last when you are young. There are a few lucky ones who marry their high school sweethearts but not all of them last. When you are young, you go through a lot of changes. Enjoy those changes but they can be frustrating. Learn from each relationship you are in. As my mother once told me you kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince. Men you have to kiss a lot of snakes before you find your princess. I have been verbally abused, used as a bank, and been a replacement for a guy yet I found a man who can't live without me. I married him when I was 24 and I am never letting him go. Yes we fight but it's how you over come the fights that's important. It's what makes a relationship stronger. It took me a while to find a guy who accepted my flaws and loves me for me. It took me a while to accept my husband as the one and I don't regret it.

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  • guys cheat to not just girls but only the douchebags honestly i think you should stay single FOR-EV-ER!!!
    s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...61d607fad3.jpg
    seriously god help us if you spawn tiny humans

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  • 1. Make sure your friends are loyal.
    2. Prenup.
    3. Get a dog, or a pet she really likes. If you do have a nasty breakup, take the pet from her. Then she'll be just as sad.
    4. Find a girl that you can trust. Lots of girls are like this. Lots of males are also like this. There is nothing you can do to change this fact so just be more discerning about who you date. And don't ever forget the prenup.

    Why do guys get married? I don't know. I'm not a guy. If you ask me why girls get married, I honestly also do not know. I'm probably not going to get married but it's because I don't understand it, not that I'm jaded by other people's failed relationships. Try not to shit on the other people that do want to pledge themselves or whatever.

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    • 3rd one is a funny one but I don't like animals any better idea

  • Maybe you should consider counselling? You are very young and have a lot of growing up to do and to be honest you don't need to be thinking or worrying about relationships or marriage right now anyways. Every second you waste being bitter, angry or negative is a second you will never get back. No one is going to force you to be in a relationship or get married so stop focusing on it. You need to learn who you are as a human being and what kind of person who want people to know you for. The world is messed up and full of bad things but you, you get to choose to either be part of the problem or be the problem solver. There are going to be people who will hurt you and who will want you to fail but you won't let them destroy the good that is in you and some days they will be close to breaking you but you won't let them. Always choose to be compassionate , loving, honest, be humble, be respectfully.

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  • More from Girls
    50

What Guys Said 94

  • When I was your age, I was single and free and in no rush to marry. Many years later I met the woman I wanted to share my life with. I had almost 40 years of bliss before cancer took her. After her death I was alone, very alone, but not fucked up and really wish there was somebody there to tell me something was my fault.

    Neither of us cheated, or left the other, or any of that crap. Those years were the best of my life!

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  • Love and intimacy are not a physical need like water and air, but people need it to live. People don't commit suicide because they think they'll never eat steak again, or because they have to drive a car they don't like. People commit suicide because they don't feel love and domt

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    • don't think anyone could ever love them.

      Being in a loving and intimate relationship is the best part about life. Sure, it's unattractive if a guy is desperate to have a relationship with any woman he can find, but a guy can and should be looking for an amazing woman to share life with.

      Most women want a relationship too, but settling for someone who you're only kinda happy with will leave you wanting more and will tempt you to cheat. Both men and women need to have the confidence and self control to look and be patient for an amazing partner, not just one they tolerate.

    • Wow. 2 thumbs up for your comment too. :)

  • oh how edgy we are today.

    Lemme guess. You loved a girl and she cheated with a player? Or she rejected you to start with, and went straight for the player?

    Tough lc

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    • White knights, lol

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    • nah, i don't need to make it my goal. We're doing that just fine already. Just takes a couple decades or centuries.

    • I know, but, if life wants me dead personally, I'd want to be the one that gets to fight back against it, right? And, in that scenario, mankind might still have a chance, but, they shouldn't have one, so, it's not fair

  • Being married means that

    - should my wife become sick, I can give medical directions on her behalf. She can do the same for me.
    - if she were to die, I would inherit our family home without paying an inheritance tax (she own the home prior to marrying me)
    - i have the right to receive her body and observe her burial requests
    - she is elegible to be on my employers health insurance plan.
    - we pay federal income taxes at a lower effective rate
    - marriage gave me the authority to represent myself as the step-father of my wife's daughters She receive the same authority to represent herself as my child's step mom.
    - she is elegible to be the beneficiary of my life insurance
    - we may be jointly considered for credit application
    - we automatically inherit each others worldly possessions without the necessity of probate court

    When I way in the military, there were many benefits that accrued only to married people:

    - basic allowance for housing (single men lived on board the ship)
    - family separation allowance (paid while deployed)
    - CHAMPUS (dependant health insurance)
    - access to the ombudsman program (best source of info on ships schedule)
    - access to base facilities including the exchange and the subsidized commissary
    - access to base housing
    - the right to be relocated to overseas duty station with military member

    It goes on and on this way. Marriage is woven into everything. The main intent is not so much that you change your status toward each other but rather you change your status before the state.

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  • I think your sour personality will result in you remaining single your entire life anyway. Just because your family sucks, does not mean other people's family sucks too.

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    • Don't you dare insult my family, there hundreds of times better people than you are and ever will be

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    • Fuck you, you worthless shit, yeah, so I had a fucking grammatical error, however, I attend an excellent high school. My parents lives are worth twice as much as yours, no, that's two little, a thousand times as much. The only lives I'd spare on this planet are my family's

    • *Too

  • lolriot.com/.../...e-get-the-next-one-half-off.jpg

    "Why would any man ever want to get married?" Umm, so they can potentially set themselves up for failure the moment that they choose to put a ring on ___'s finger? Ya know via having to sit their dumbasses in some courtroom as their life earnings are "divided/sucked" from them right in front of their faces? And by law there's nothing that they can do about it. But watch from the outside #FacePalm ^_^

    www.dumpaday.com/.../...ds-got-a-divorce-funny.jpg

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    • Ya know via having to sit their dumbasses down in some courtroom and watch as their life earnings are "divided/sucked" from them right in front of their faces? *

    • >o > Don't let your #MistWaifus see this Mist-sensei or they'll think you see them as nothing but cheats and money grabbers.

  • The ignorance is strong with this one.

    I am one of nine siblings. I am the oldest. I am from the original biological set of five, the remaining four were adopted.

    So far, of the five, I am the only one that matches your description. Because I keep falling for damsels in distress, without knowing if they deserve to be or not. I never made it to the altar with any of my "Dirty Dozen" backstabbing girls. I caught on to them, or forced them to blow their cover, long before it got to that point. Most of them hate me now, because I was right all along and they're too proud to make peace.

    My brother is happily married. My two sisters are happily married. My youngest bio-sister is living with some freak, and they have a sort of Bonnie and Clyde / Joker Harley thing going on. Neither wants to speak to me, because they know they've done wrong. They're not married legally yet, but may as well be common law married.

    Of the remaining four, two are in high school. One is in 8th grade. The last one is in 7th grade.

    Most by the time they reach their mid-20s learn how to get their sh*t together. The rest become basket cases, condemned to wander the earth with their baggage - earned or otherwise, till they become dust once more.

    Don't leap into the latter category prematurely. You will hate yourself if you do.

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  • tell that to all the successful marriages.

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    • People cheat even in successful marriages, it just happens that they never get caught. I would say a lot more people cheat and not get caught, than those that do cheat and do get caught.

      Given an example, my mother cheated on my dad and I was a witness of it, but I didn't destroy their marriage and I didn't tell anybody. I don't mean to be negative, and I'm not, but many marriages stay alive due to the cheater never getting caught. I'm just being realistic here.

    • @Calex I won't dispute that, but I wouldn't define that as a successful marriage.

    • There's no actual way to knowing which marriages are successful and which are not, unfortunately :[

  • There are no benefits for a man to get married other than creating a stable environment for the child.

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    • I don't know about that.

      I like having regular sex with someone I love.
      Stability isn't just for children. In fact it isn't even principally for children.

      My wife and I have been married for 9 years. The youngest child in the house is 16. He'll be out in about 3 years.

      My wife and I are looking forward to our next 4 decades together, just the 2 of us.

      How is that for stability?

    • @gray_sailor : Wisdom all of us can bank on.

    • I'm glad you're part of the exception, but you know the number of marriages that have failed.

  • This is true. But imma still get married cuz I want someone to hold and love and get shmexy with

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  • Well, my godfather used to say, "Men don't get married because they want to, they get married because they give up and concede."

    What do they concede to? "When are we going to get married? Where is this relationship going? Are you serious about us? Do you love me? All my friends are married. Everyone is getting married. Don't you trust me? Are you afraid of commitment?"

    I don't entirely agree with my godfather. I think men lose as soon as they engage the statements that women make, as having even a hint of truth. Men do this nasty little thing called giving women the benefit of the doubt, when women speak about the topic of marriage. Men desperately want to basically have a relationship with a man, but in a woman's body, because they enjoy having sex with women. They want to feel like their partner is communicating to them on a high level or philosophically, in search of the purely rational and dispassionately logical truth. No bias, no self-interest, no manipulation or ulterior motives. Just a quest for knowledge and wisdom.

    (rolls eyes) <-- look at my eyes rolling.

    As soon as the man does that, he's lost. The solution to the problem is simple. You have to just accept that the "fantasy" relationship you want to have with a woman is never going to be something you'll ever realistically experience. That's life, just deal with it and move on.

    Women are not these magical angelic fairy-like creatures who are playfully pleasant and want nothing more than to shower your dick with attention. That doesn't mean they're evil. That just means they're human... with their own self-interest and selfish motives... with their own desires... and sometimes, those desires and interests run completely in conflict with your own interests as a man.

    Marriage is an example of that.

    Now, some girls just want a "wedding." A "wedding" and "marriage" are not the same thing. A wedding is a party. A marriage is a legally binding contract, with legally enforceable financial consequences upon dissolution.

    Money and financial power are my tits and ass as a man. If you are proposing to have the right to continue to play with my tits and ass should we no longer be together, my answer will be "no." For as long as we're together, we can enjoy the benefits of being together. But if I'm not happy, I'm leaving (and my tits and ass are coming with me). So, if you want to continue to play with them, do what you have to so that I prefer staying with you.

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    • Otherwise, how does your proposed contract benefit "ME" (as the man) in any way, shape, or form? It doesn't. You need my consent to get what you want, but what you're asking for doesn't benefit me in any way. Not only does it not benefit me, it carries with it SEVERE financial consequences and risks that mostly apply to ME (and because of what value is actually important in a man, disproportionately affect me more). A court never orders an ex-wife to lose 50lbs., get 10 years younger, and go back to her ex-husband's house every week to enthusiastically fuck him or blow him. So, for the sake of equality... because we're all about equality... I don't get to enjoy your tits and ass... you don't get to enjoy mine... should we ever not be together anymore... it's all equal... it's all fair... and that's that.

      We can still live together, love each other, have kids, be a family, change your name, etc. So, there is nothing really substantial to be gained from marriage.

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    • Marriage is not going to change that. Is she saying that it's more important to her for you to be "forced" or "obligated" or "financially blackmailed" to be with her... than it is for her to wake up next to you each day and know that you're with her simply because (although you "could" easily leave and walk away), you voluntarily prefer being with her and want to be with her?

      Marriage is what women want when they don't trust men... when they don't trust a man's ability to say "no" to his penis and other women... when they don't trust men to stay even as she gets old and less beautiful... because she believes that you're just an animal driven by its penis (and so she has to tie the donkey to the barn while she still can, before it's too late and she can't lure him around the same opportunity anymore). That's insulting on so many levels.

      So, you're willing to give her what she reasonably wants, and you don't need "marriage" to do that.

    • What that means, then, is that if she's insisting on marriage (and isn't just confused or conflating marriage with her inner little girl childhood desire to have a "wedding"), then she wants MORE than any stated legitimate or reasonable interest she may have.

      That's a diplomatic and nice way of saying, "she wants to tie you down and make sure you can't move or go anywhere... by LAW... and should SHE no longer want to be with you anymore, that she will CRIPPLE you financially... thereby depriving you of the male tits and ass you worked so hard to acquire... so that ONLY SHE and NO OTHER WOMAN can ever enjoy the fruits of your life and labor."

      At that point, please kindly point to the Thirteenth Amendment of the U. S. Constitution (prohibition against slavery) ... and feel free to use your middle finger to direct her attention.

  • Got rejected? A few girls that cheat don't make it all girls.

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  • Dude seriously? You have a really low opinion of women. If this happened to you then you have to realize that it was just THAT woman. There are loads of other women out there.. BILLIONS IN FACT! You just have to go out there and meet people to realize that there are loads of great women out there. They may not be exactly like that girl in personality or anything but would you want that?

    Honestly you have to back up from the situation and look at it objectively. That was ONE woman.

    Dude I used to be jaded about relationships too until my last one made me realize that there are ones that I'd want to be in. Before that I was always in abusive ones where the girl treated me like dog shit. I always sought out girls like that because I didn't have any self worth and I hated myself. But I realized I do have worth and I'm a pretty phenomenal guy with my own pros and cons just like everyone else. Now anything I find in the future will be better because I realized that. I can always grow to be better and I will continue to do so. We can all do that.

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  • See, marriage sounds awesome, but there are high chances of getting screwed.
    Marriage, if it goes good, is probably the best thing in the world after being a parent, but if it goes bad, it's worse than hell.
    So you gotta choose wisely, and this goes for women too. You can't just marry someone that calls you pretty and smiles at you, there's way more than that.
    I'm not gonna lie, with who I am right now and how I feel, I don't have marriage in my future plans, basically because I have too much trouble finding a woman that meets my expectations (which are high, not gonna lie, and I blame myself for that).
    But I don't know in the future, maybe I come across that perfect girl and I get attached to her forever, but life's unpredictable, and you shouldn't close doors, especially at your age.

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  • That's a miguided teenager talking.

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  • Well if that's how a man is to think then he should never get married, staying single or wanting to get married is a personal choice, an individual choice so that's up to the person. The man doesn't have to get married, he doesn't have to do anything he doesn't want too, he can just stay single and happy.

    However I would say these risks are involved, yes, love/relationships/marriage do come along with their own risks, so if the man is brave enough to take risks then he can go ahead with relationships/marriage

    However if he wants to "PLAY SAFE" and be protective to his feelings, if he wants to avoid all these risks then he should never get married.

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  • Unfortunately that is true. Women today have surpassed the old stereotypes of men and become much worse.
    I was married for 25 years.
    I love her as much today as any.
    she cheated, found out she never loved me, was a very co-dependent situation.
    And I would do it all again with her in a minute.
    I have 3 wonderful sons and much more great memories then bad.
    ..
    as far as the future? I may get married. If your going to live with someone anyway you should at least get the tax benefits and other security that marriage gives. But we will see.

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  • Then you have a poor choice in girls.
    I was cheated on too by an ex, but I learned from it.

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  • That's a good question and I often ask myself the same question especially as from what I have seen with my own life, couples who get married tend to get divorced pretty quickly afterwards, I have known this to be true of four couples; marriage can either enhance a relationship or change it completely and make the relationship worse.

    So it is a risk, but sometimes in life you have to take risks or determine if it's obtaining something more, or something else is worth the risk.

    I used to be dead set against marriage, dead set against the whole nuclear family ideal because it seemed boring to me and like you I had suffered a few bad experiences with a few lousy women that I chose over some perfectly good women through my inability to think logically about the women I was choosing (my own fault) but over the last few years I have started to soften and even warm to the idea.

    A couple doesn't have to get married, they can of course choose not to marry and can be together in the long-term. An old school friend of mine; his parents have been together for over thirty years and haven't married and never will. It works for them and good luck to them, marriage doesn't necessarily make your relationship better or worse it's just the luck of the draw.

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  • she'll just cheat on you... not necessarily true
    waste of time... don't see how it's a waste of time. there are certainly far greater wastes of time like (no offense) this site

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  • I can't tell if this is a joke or not, but if it isn't you have a lot of growing up to do. Quit being so damn pessimistic.

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  • Is this what happened to your parents?

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  • Seriously? dude, its not that bad and that scenario happens in dating. after marriage, its a lot worse than that. trust me. one or two bad experiences isn't reason enough to cut the whole idea.

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  • I know the way I feel right now I never want to get married but that is not because of what you have said here but other reasons.

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  • Marriage doesn't have to be negative; it doesn't always turn out crappy.

    Lots of people share a lifetime of love. It just sounds like that hasn't been modeled for you by anybody.

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  • Ehh that's kinda iffy. I mean, you sound like the male version of that girl going "men are all pigs who will cheat on you and leave you anyway..."

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  • You sound incredibly immature and insecure.
    You shouldn't get married as your energy would actually be the influence that makes your worst nightmare a reality.
    I would never cheat on a girl and that tells me that there are girls out there that wouldn't either.

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  • Well, you're generalizing and already assuming every situation is just the same. However, I would never marry a western girl that's for sure. Your chances of getting screwed up are too high I agree on that, and now it's seems as a cultural thing (ahem *hypergamy*) so yeah no man should just jump the board, be extremely careful of whom you'll end up with.

    I'm not thinking of marrying at this point even though my ship is sailing... And if I ever do so, I'll make sure I'll date that person for more hen 3 years or something, no need to rush into it and I want to make sure I'm judging well on character.

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  • #bitter #troll , I sense.

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