Why are men frightened of marriage?


Title says it all. Simple question, anyone can answer. I just found a video with the same title and decided to post this question.
What is it that makes men in todays society to be afraid of marriage?



Updates:
Ladies and gents, I know very well it's not just men. But this question is about men fearing marriage.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think men have every right to be afraid of marriage.

    One word. Divorce.

    My parents divorce is a perfect example. My mum was a stay at home mum and she raised me and my 4 brothers. My dad went to work and came home and helped with us. We all went to school and while we were gone my mum cleaned the house. A very traditional arrangement. When I was 13, she got a job as a security guard and she went out to work. My parents started to get divorced 2 years later. Fast forward until the end of the divorce and the resolution was this - my dad kept the house and assets because he got custody of me (all my brothers are older) because I requested to the court not to be with my mother and she didn't fight it. My mother got all of the money - she got my dad's mothers inheritance, she got my university fund (which meant I didn't go, particularly upsetting because she used it to do a third degree), she was given enough money to pay her bills and get a house. She also gets half of my dads pension which means my dad is 61 and no plans to retire. She gets nothing while he is still working.

    I completely understand why a man wouldn't want to marry. And I have said to my boyfriend, because I do want to get married, I would happily sign a pre-nap. I wouldn't ever be as vindictive as my bitch of a mother, and if he wanted to give me anything, it should be out of choice not force.

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    • Damn that sounds too bad! It wasn't that bad with my parents since we were always more on the poor side.

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    • Thank you for MH! I hope I can help you in the future.

    • I am following you for a reason dear.

What Girls Said 6

  • I really think the problem with marriage now a days is not actual marriage but how it is portrayed.

    A lot of men are afraid of divorce and I don't blame them.

    But what it comes down to is choosing a partner wisely. We hear these scary stories about men who have married women who treat them terribly. We feel bad for the guy. But at the end of the day HE Chose to get married to her. He could have walked away, but he didn't. Now I'm not saying people can't change after marriage. That does happen.

    But if your wife is so terrible to you and demeans you every day and you just got married, run for the hills. I would personally leave her if she treats you like crap. It's not worth staying with someone like that.

    The thing is, people are not perfect. I have a friend who complains about her husband all the time. The little things he does that bug her so much and make her mad. But they are just little things. I personally chose a long time ago to not let little things like that bug me. Whenever I am with a guy I try to be as easy going as possible. But I'm still single!

    I would love to get married one day if someone would give me the chance. I think I would make an excellent partner. I look at relationships as teamwork and partnerships. Sometimes you have to make sacrifices and compromises and I am ok with that. I'm not going to demean my future husband over little things because that makes no sense to me.

    However, I think the real problem in society is that people are more focussed on marrying someone they think is the ultimate attractive partner, and they neglect to focus on that partner being a good person deep down. I know so many mean people who are married. It's frustrating because so many guys tell me I would make an amazing wife one day but I am not married and don't really have many guys chasing me.

    So I'm just doing my own thing. But it makes me sad to hear about people being mistreated.

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    • I like your opinion as well. I want to focus on the point where you say that people can change. What can also change is certain situation that can ruin a marriage.
      One example is my parents. My father told me once ''I still can't understand how your mother changed so much when you and your brother were born. As if I married a complete different person''. I can't get into more details, because both my parents are not open about this subject and they're hiding many things from me and my brother.

      Another example is one of my close friends. Ten years of happy marriage and suddenly he's getting fired and now the only one working in the family is his wife in the restaurant she owns, with him helping for some hours because at 45 years old he will never find a job, so he must take care of the kids. Financially the situation sucks, but what also sucks is the gender roles reversal, which made his wife a lunatic. Now she is busting his balls every day, calling him a fat loser.

  • It's supposed to be an automatic sperm hold.

    I think part of the reason men are against it is because, in a way, it goes against nature and instincts.

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  • So many things can go wrong. Basically, you're signing over your autonomy to another person who may or may not treat you well.

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    • For the record, it's not just men. I have not believed marriage was for me since I was a child seeing my parents marriage.

  • Because people seem to marry evil cunts or treat people so badly they take everything they can and then men assume all women are like that. They aren't so it's their loss really.

    Marriage is pointless any way, it's just not needed. If you can get divorced what is the point?

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  • I don't know maybe they scared

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  • Because they don't want to be tied down to one woman for the rest of their life.

    Ps. Plenty of women are afraid of marriage as well. (Like me)

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What Guys Said 13

  • I believe men are tired of losing everything they work for. This can be vehicle, house, 401k, kids, money. It just too much of a risk now if you marry the wrong person.

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    • you said it all

    • Yea your question hit the spot. Good question. I just hope more guys post so women can learn something if they want to know why a man won't marry them after so many years of being together.

  • Divorce courts heavily favour the woman, especially when it comes to custody of any children.

    There's very little in it for a guy to get married, unless he gets his rocks off from being taken to the cleaners.

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  • Divorce is the biggest factor and everything that comes along with it: lawyer fees and dues, alimony, child support, and losing half of everything he earned.

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  • That's because marriage is not a joke, it's a big commitment and some men just don't want to get married, they don't want to take those responsibilities that comes along with that.

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  • Because the courts are CLEARLY biased in favor of women.

    Men go into marriage risking everything they ever owned, should they ever divorce. Women go into marriage with absolutely nothing to lose, and possibly even something to GAIN, should they ever divorce.

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  • It's a big commitment not just limited to men

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  • because it comes with legal obligations that enables her to fuck you over big time, if you divorce one day...

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  • Seinfeld explains it all, like always!

    Basically, girlfriend/boyfriend is a fun time, marriage is a commitment, ur SO is ALWAYS there.

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  • Most divorces seem to be started by women statistically and in practice from my life. The men generally make more and therefor have more to lose as well.

    The divorce courts always favor women unless she has a mental illness, for custody, money, or anything really.

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  • It's should be very obvious. Because the laws make it a horrible situation for Men! It benefits women greatly, and literally destroys Men!

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  • I don't think that men are... at least the men I know.

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    • I guarantee you most men are nowadays.

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    • @snoopybaron I can afford the cost of a wedding so... money isn't an issue!

    • but can you afford the cost of a divorce? that is the problem! (i'm also pro-marriage but i'm concerned about it at the same time)

  • Try Indians... they always ready to marry,, even they already married...

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  • because there's so many hot babes out there to be with just one

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