My fiancé doesn't want my sisters as a bridesmaid?

She's having her sister and best friend as bridesamaids and her little sister and little cousin as a flower girl. I've got three little sisters, one of them she really hates so I don't expect her to be one but my little little sisters are only 7 and 9 I told them they probably will be one a long time ago. I just expected her to let them be one, but she's not. I said to her about it and she said no there's no need for two more flower girls!
she told them right to there faces no
I'm trying to convince her but I'm running out of time. But I'm soo angry at her for being horrible to little girls who basically idolize her!
How can I change her mind?
Am I right to be angry?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well they are too young to be bridesmaids, but you should be working together to find a role to include them in the wedding.

    One on my friends married a guy with 5 little sisters, ranging in age from under 5 to college aged. Only the oldest was a bridesmaid, the two youngest were flower girls and the middle two had a different role (it was 5 years ago so my memory is a little fuzzy of what exactly they did).

    Are your sisters musically inclined? Have them play a song during the ceremony.

    Or they can do a reading for you guys, if they aren't.

    If she refuses to include them in any capacity then you are absolutely right to be upset about it. You need to work together to find a place for these girls in the wedding.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's really a mater of which is more important to you, the woman or the family. If she won't compromise now this will be the rest of your life. Walk away now while its only going to cost you the price of the wedding, before it becomes alimony and child support. Go go now.

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What Girls Said 12

  • Wow are you sure you want to marry her? But um I think you should make your sisters groomswomen/groomsmaids

    happywedd. com/.../groomsmaid_02. jpg

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  • I think you are right. Wedding are about compromising and I don't get why a woman would react that way. It's not just her wedding it's also about you. It's insensitive.

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  • while 1) your sisters are too young to be bridesmaids and 2) your fiancee should be able to choose her own bridal party, i agree that your anger is justified and her unwillingness to compromise does not bode well for the future of the relationship.

    if it's important to you that your sisters are included, maybe discuss the possibility of involving them in another role. if she is still unwilling to compromise, perhaps you should reconsider marrying her.

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  • Maybe find another place in the wedding for them so they don't feel left out. When I was younger my little sister was my mom's friends flower girl and she made me the bubble girl, I basically stood in the back and walked back and forth blowing bubbles. They also has my brother and another little boy in the front corners doing the same thing but standing still. I thought the was nice and creative to get the extra siblings involved. Make sure she knows how much it means to you to have your sisters involved in YOUR wedding. Remind her it's a day for both of you and that it's a big deal to you as much as the rest of it is to her

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  • it's your wedding too. she's being a bitch unnecessarily, and towards little kids. I'd honestly see that as a major red flag of what's to come in your marriage and perhaps reconsider the whole thing.

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  • Dont think there's any way to change her mind. she's a bitch.

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  • Lmao seriously. All these dumb women calling her names because she doesn't want your sister as HER bridesmaids or flower girl. Are they close? It's up to her to choose HER bridesmaids. Just like you can choose YOUR best man. Gtf.

    I wish the downvote button was still on this dumbass website. Ugh

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    • I wish it was here too, so I could downvote this nonsense. it isn't only about the bride. it's his wedding too.

    • @thewanderingme Are u slow. Did I say it's only about her? Hell no. I said she is supposed to choose her bridesmaids and he's supposed to choose his best man's. The husband can't make the bride choose someone she doesn't want as her bridesmaid and vice versa. Gtf lady and stop putting words in my mouth. I can already tell what type of husband he's gonna be, a controlling one. His fiancee should just not waste her time

  • Tell her that its not just her wedding its yours too and that you want your two sisters to be apart of it. If she doesn't want them as flower girls then she needs to be able to find another part for them to be in the wedding

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  • Yeah, that's a bitchy move. Tell her that it would be really important to you and would make YOU happy because it's your wedding too, that your sisters should be in the wedding too. There are no rules to weddings, it can be how you and your fiance want it to be. Tell her it would make you happy if your family can be apart of the wedding party too.

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  • She sounds like an immature bitch.

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  • No I think it's up to her to choose bridesmaids. Just like you can choose your best man and stuff.

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  • Oh hell yah I would be angry!! That's a bad sign! Sorry but if she can't compromise that's not a good start! That's your family!! My husband has 5 sisters 3 were under 10 last year when we got married and since I know how important they are to him and how much they love me I just had my bridesmaids and then "jr bridesmaids" they didn't go to the bachelorette party but they were up with me in the wedding as they should be. It was a compromise. I had my sisters family and friends with me and then his were with me also :)

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What Guys Said 6

  • It's HER bridal party, not yours. This are people who are important to her life. There's no reason you can't have them in your party. My niece just got married and the groom's best man was actually a woman. There's nothing wrong with that.

    If it's important to you that they be in the wedding... then make a place in the wedding for them. But don't expect her to. The bridal party is hers. Let her have them.

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  • And you're marrying this selfish woman... well, "woman"? Dude you can't do much, it seems she has you by the balls, so it's her call.

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  • This clip should tell you all about compromising:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYY5Ilo-l3I

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  • You have more than one sister. Most likely they'll marry. They can be each other's bridesmaids.

    Your fiancee chooses her bridesmaids, you choose your groomsmen.

    I do agree with what others said, though, that marriage is about compromising. Maybe you should tell your fiancee that this doesn't set a good precedent.

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  • yes, you are. tell her that the marriage is off til this problem is solved. things continue like this... NO ONE'S gonna be happy.

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    • I can't call it off, I've paid for everything and it's not that far away now

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    • they do and she always takes them out to get there nails and hair did, she loves them too that's why I don't understand

    • okay, that you didn't mention. still, my point remains the same. this ain't gonna be a happy union, if this ain't result... particularly, for you.

  • They're too young to be bridesmaids. One should be the flower girl instead if the cousin, the cousin and your sister should be given a separate role, maybe reading.

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