Would you date (to eventually marry) a single parent when you dont have a child yourself?

before you say i would, know they have a divorce rate of 75 percent.., your parnters old lover whos a parent of your step daughter will likely be around, you're spending money on someone elses kid and eventually have to become their step monther/father to make it work with your lover, if the child doesn't like you, he/or she will more likely end it...

its very risky and costly to take the chance... not to mentiona man like me hate hearing about their pst but the child will put images in your head of them having sex in the past... etc... it surely will bug me a lot.

Updates:
also, single mothers are looking for resources... its not bad people want a good life but do you want to feel used? she won't be with you if you didn't get lucky with your career... so much is about her cause she's very needy...

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes and I did. My SO had a seven year old daughter. She is now 21 and at uni and we have had another boy and a girl (11 and 9). Everything has been great.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Both of my kids are grown, so it's kind of like I don't have kids anymore, at least ones I have to raise. So I wouldn't have any problem at all dating someone with kids. And I personally never hate hearing about a partner's sexual past. I encourage them to talk about it if they feel comfortable.

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What Girls Said 12

  • Of course! That's how my son came into my life. I got an amazing 8 year old son by marrying his dad. For a woman, it's a great deal; you get beautiful children without having to get pregnant, give birth, work to get your old body back, and change diapers. And you're flat out wrong about all mothers being needy. Plenty of them are hard-working, resourceful, talented women. They aren't any more needy than single dads are. I think you are looking at this dating thing all the wrong way. It can be a great thing (albeit it does take some work and some finesse) instead of a disadvantage!

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    • hey i never seen that perspective about getting a child wihtout ruining your figure part. learn something new lol but id want my own flesh and blood.

      I've just seen too many single mothers who are unhappy and struggling. it just looks heavy to me. shell be subtle about everything and break me in to the roles she wants me to play. i know this, too.

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    • I have a child, and let me tell you... at least for ME, it was an incredible struggle trying to get that tight stomach back. Your body is just never the same. I am so glad I have my daughter, and I wouldn't change a thing. But having a baby is no joke. It's miserable and painful and it wrecks you physically. That makes me even more grateful and respectful to his ex; she gave him a son. Now he has a son and a daughter, and I only had to get pregnant once. That's a beautiful thing.

    • I do see your point, though, about some single parents being miserable, or about them using a partner just for daycare, money or an extra parental figure. I think you just have to be careful to avoid those particular people. Too many people lower their standards for dating; those are actually the highest standards you should have. It's okay to be picky.

  • As long as he wanted to have kids with me as well, I would. And assuming he's a good dad to the kid (s) he already has.

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  • I'm just not into that... If I were 40 then maybe - if the kids were normal, well behaved and good people > but even then... not that sure. Right now - not a chance.

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  • Doesn't sound like you should. Doesn't sound like you'll be happy but between 30-35 that may limit your options, may not.

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  • It isn't something that bothers me as long as if it is a serious relationship that my partner allows me to be on equal standing. Meaning he backs up my authority.

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  • I dated a man with 3 kids from 2 different girls and his personality was just fantastic and that didn't bother me whatsoever.

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    • how old was he and are you with him now?

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    • oh you came on too strong eh, that was a surprise to me. but 3 kids from 2 different mothers, he seems like the womanizer type and seems to go for certain types he can cast his spell on lol. oh thats interesting about your friend. i m one of those guys who would never but if she's hot enough and has the personality. i dont know... i hope her kids dad is dead. thatd be ideal lol

    • And also if I date someone with kids it's not necessarily a plus for me and I do have options.. It's truly because I am interested in them and they swept me off my feet and kids don't matter at that point you can always make it work!

  • No I do not date single fathers

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  • I would marry divorced man But I will not marry a single dad

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    • i get it. if you have a clean slate youd want a clean slate from them as welll

  • I've tried once, and do not plan to try again any time soon. If I'm older and still single, then I would try again. Even though I don't have a kid, and I really loved the guy I would accept his child into my life.

    My ex's son loved me and it broke my heart twice when his father broke my heart then I had to say goodbye to him, too.

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  • Well is he willing to wait til marriage with me?

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  • I would because I would probably end up loving them as my own

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  • Yes
    ...

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    • would you eventually have a child of his own and be step mother to his kid/s?

What Guys Said 2

  • No I wouldn't. I won't date anyone who has or wants kids.
    Kids are a guaranteed deal breaker for me.

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  • I'd avoid it but if I really loved her one kid wouldn't matter.

    If she had more than 1 it would be a 100% dealbreaker as I want one of my own at least.

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