The only reason my mom does not approve of my fiance is because he is not arab and is a jew years younger. He treats me well, is very respectful to my parents and is highly educated - a doctor.
I introduced my parents to him almost a year ago with the intention of marriage. A few weeks ago I told my parents again I want to get married this September. My mother became visibly upset. I still live with my parents (b/c culturally it isn't acceptable to move out until marriage) and it's difficult because my mother will never bring my fiance up. If I do she gets agitated and upset. She's told me how selfish I am for wanting to marry him, how screwed up my kids (if I have any) will be because they will be mixed ethnicity, etc.
I get that I can't change my mom, but it really hurts my feelings, especially since my younger brother got married a few years ago and I saw how involved my mom was with all the wedding planning, and how she did all the mother-daughter stuff with my brother's now wife like picking out flowers, the wedding venue, the food, etc.
My brother had a very extravagent wedding, with 400 people and all the trimmings. My father said my wedding will be a small one.
I almost feel like I'm being punished because my parents are not thrilled about who I am marrying, only for the reason that he is not arab and wasn't born muslim (even though he fake converted so my parents would accept him. My fiance and I are not muslim but we pretend because my dad said he will disown me if I'm not muslim).
Most Helpful Guy
I'd suggest you have a heart to heart with your mom, away from the wedding planning. Just ask her how she's going to deal with the likely grandchildren, her own flesh and blood. Is she going to reject them? That's not how she raised you. Get her to step away from the moment and take the longer view. Hopefully, she'll see the light and come around.0