My husband and I have been married for 6 years now. We're in our late 30's (excuse the age on here). Had problems trying to have children and have just escalated from there. Most nights, my husband will fall asleep on the couch after playing games or on his phone. I notice that he holds his phone in his hand more than my own hand. Intimacy has become less and less. It feels very "disconnected"
I never go into his phone but he forgot to lock his phone and I noticed a message come in from someone. Turns out he has been flirting with a young woman in his office for 6 months. She is 15 years younger. The messages are incredibly inappropriate, asking her out for lunch, talking about receiving massages, calling each other "love" and "dear", my husband talking about going on a holiday with her as he's "tired". My husband messages this woman even when she's away on holiday. Disrespectful to our marriage and quite obsessive from both parts. He knows this womans mother and regularly talks about her family to her. They call each other at least a few times a week. To be honest, it doesn't surprise me as my husband has his phone in his hand CONSTANTLY. Constantly checking. Honestly - he puts more effort into their communication than ours. As far as I know, they haven't caught up outside of work or slept together. However even touching in person (I would hate to know how they act together in person) would be sexually cheating to me. I believe this woman has a causal boyfriend yet this doesn't seem to phase my husband - quite clearly.
I calmly confronted him. Defensive at first then he admitted that he feels more attraction to her, that he even is falling in love with this woman but has a different sort of love for me. That he doesn't know why but feels a genuine sort of happiness around this woman that he doesn't feel around me. When I asked him why he hasn't seeked divorce, he told me that he would make his family unhappy (we're Muslim). What would you do in my situation?
Most Helpful Girl
Omg! You have to divorce him! I don't know much about Muslim culture but I do know while on this earth we should all have the happiest, most satisfying time we can. You are not getting that but you deserve to. Please leave him and begin enjoying love, passion, warmth and connection to someone worthy.2