Negative thoughts about marriage?

Hey everyone! I'm a 15 year old boy, and one day, I was in the bathroom when I suddenly heard mom say to my dad 'When will the day come where all our children would get married?'. So this got me thinkin', I already have a girlfriend! I already plan on marrying her! But one little problem. My parents well... Kind of don't approve it :/ Basically! Because, well... She's American, and I'm an Arabian Muslim (no not terrorist, you know... The kind of peaceful friendly Arabian just like anybody else on this planet, maybe?) So... My parents are following Islam (me too) and follow Islam rules VERY strictly, they know about my girlfriend, and they also got this generalization about most to all American girls being whores or look freaks or sluts and... etc, now don't get me wrong, I LOVE my girlfriend, she's great, gorgeous (literally), understanding, warm and she's such a sweetheart! But my parents personally disencourage me dating her and try to make my contact with her little to no contact at all, for example, currently in Ramadan (Muslim holiday) they tell me talking romantically to your significant other is haram, or that our relationship will end eventually someday because teenagers don't stay in love for long... etc. I kind of get the thought that they will take down the idea of me marrying someday... Maybe when I intend to do so at the right age... We really want to marry each other and are saving sex and all that till after marriage because that's an Islamic law, I just get the fear of my parents eventually taking down the idea and refusing our engagement, what will I do by then? Would I be completely devastated for the rest of my life? Would I be forced to find someone else? Because I AM 100% sure my girlfriend is the only RIGHT one for me. And thanks for taking the time to read my issue guys. Sorry about my bad English and lots of words. :D


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Firstly, I am sorry to hear you're in such a difficult situation, it's hard when you feel as though you're being backed into a corner. There's nothing wrong with thinking about marriage; but I would consider the hurdles you have to jump now, many things lead to marriage, so I think that's important to keep in mind. I am not Islamic, so unfortunately my understanding of the culture is fairly limited, but as far as I can gather your engagement to your girlfriend would need the approval of your parents. If they say no, that becomes your own decision, do you go against their wishes? Do you meet someone else? The answer is one only you can decide. If you feel that she is truly the one for you then I would fight for it regardless of what anybody else thought or thinks, but it really is up to you and your happiness, as I don't know what the repercussions would be for you in your culture. Best of luck!

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Most Helpful Guy

  • i am Egyptian , so i can understand what you are being through
    and getting a boner in Ramadan is not the best thing to do , but if you wannaa something insist on it and you will get it
    the problem i guess is about compatibility between you two,
    i dunno both of you , but did you think about how daily habits concepts and traditions gonna affect you both

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What Girls Said 2

  • You're 15, you will believe this person is the right one for you and that you're destined to be together, that's what hormones do to you. Don't worry so much about getting married etc. So many of my friends were engaged or gonna get married when we were 15-17 and none of them ever did. Just have fun and be a teen, don't stress about getting married so much. If you're still together when you're in your mid twenties, then get married.

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  • My head hurts from reading that... You're 15. Why are you even thinking about marriage.

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    • I'm sorry, that's the simplest way possible to type my issue down XD I just wanted advice that's all :) But hey! I'm a teenager, I'm supposed to be curious and stuff!

What Guys Said 0

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