How did you know he or she was the one for those who are married or engaged?

I've heard many engaged or married people say that they just knew he or she is the one. Did you experience this? How did you know?


Most Helpful Guy

  • For me the two times it happened was in the bedroom. The first one who made me feel that way got away, the second I married. I'll try to borrow from a previous post I wrote on this subject:

    "Bad sex" to me is sex without a connection, like masturbation with a body. It doesn't have to do with mechanics or physical pleasure.

    The chemistry isn't there that kind of allows us to meld and read each other's thoughts. I've often tried sticking around because I found the girl attractive, found her personality charming, but it's not something that improves with technique. Sometimes the connection just isn't there in the sexual moments.

    Usually when that happens, I'm incapable of really developing intense feelings for the girl (and probably her for me as well), and it's usually time to end the relationship.

    I tend to discover my true feelings for a girl and how compatible we are inside the bedroom.

    I might just be a certain type, but I actually believe in an idea similar to "sexual soulmates". It's something I experienced twice in my life, and fell for both women where we had this kind of effect. The second I married.

    All the women in between just didn't have this intense of a connection there in the bedroom, and it didn't have to do with anything like blowjob technique.

    It had to do with how we kind of understood each other's bodies and minds, and I'm not sure that's something that can really be taught. The two women who did that to me just felt like our bodies and minds were made for each other.

    The first one, technique-wise, was actually kind of horrible. And she physically wasn't even my type at the time (quite skinny, small breasts, long arms and neck). It came as a surprise to me how passionate things got in the bedroom, and how we could smile and laugh and enjoy the time together so much. Yet it was then that I kind of realized I wanted her in my life more than anything else.

    It's not that sex is so important to me, but that connection in the bedroom is kind of the foundation for me to have the strongest feelings of love towards a woman I can possibly have, and often followed by dates and romantic exchanges of affection that can potentially last forever. That, to me, is very important, but it always began for me in the bedroom.

    In those rare moments when I feel like this with a woman in the bedroom, what makes her "the one" is the simple feeling that my life seems incomplete without her. There is nothing I want more than her.

    • So to me this feeling is ultimately discovered and born from sex when we discover that we're kind of sexual soulmates in the bedroom, during the most intimate moment possible between a man and a woman.

      From that kind of "seed" is born all kinds of feelings of love and desire. Desire can sometimes fade a bit over the years, but the love that remains is very strong. She becomes like my oxygen supply, cut it off for too long and I'll begin to suffocate. And that's still true of my wife going into 8 years.

      Note that I've been with dozens of women but only 2 women had this effect on me. From that limited sample, that suggests very roughly that only around 5% or 6% of women can actually make me feel this way for them, beyond liking them like a friend to loving them like a lifelong partner. The ultimate test is the bedroom.

    • Note that I'm the type who sees sex as one of the most intimate activities between a male and female, and I also have this view that it is the sole activity exclusively shared by lovers. I have a number of close female friends (as well as male) and can enjoy a lot of things with them. But sex is reserved solely for my lover. I didn't marry my "best friend", I married the woman I was most passionate about touching, holding, kissing, cuddling, and ultimately sleeping with together.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, I'm not engaged or married but I did find "the one" and yeah... I just know.
    Our relationship is great and imagining spending the rest of my life with him is really exciting.
    It feels so right to be with him. I love him and feel loved. I love everything about us together.


What Guys Said 4

  • Q: How did you know he or she was the one for those who are married or engaged?

    A: She practically had a gun to my head.

  • I think it kind of just happens at one point in the relationship or when you meet and that click happens and you both feel it

  • iv been engaged a lot and married once and honestly it was like a flip of a coin for all but the marriage and that was a mistake..

  • I just knew it


What Girls Said 1

  • I have never experinced it but ı think that's something that you feel. Just have to trust your feelings.

    • dont trust your feelings... hearts lead y'all into trap doors of despair.. follow logic,, Does he treat you well.. will he be a godo provider and father...

    • @MrAssHat but even you use your logic it's what u see outside...

    • By the way I am a kind of person who thinks logically but these are just my opinions about the people she described