Girlfriend wants to tell my wife about our affair, how do I get out of this?

I'm happily married with a 3 year old son. My wife and I stopped having sex due to work schedules. She even decided to stop sex to avoid scaring our son (and to prevent him from being ok with premarital sex). She even thought certain cartoons like Pokémon would be violent for him to watch. I make sure to keep a check on his TV time. She even thinks that he should not talk to girls or make interracial friends.

At work, I met a beautiful younger woman who started to give me the attention my wife refused to. She also is much more liberal when. It comes to raising children (worked in a day care in College. she laughed out loud when my wife forbade him from watching Pokémon.

We had sex for the first time and have been doing it for a week. She loves me and wants me to leave my wife. If I dont, shell leave my wife. But, I fear a divorce costs and hurting my son.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Okay dude I will try to hold my self from lashing at you because it will get me nowhere. There is no way to undo what you did.
    This is why I think guys your age shouldn't get married.
    The worst part is that you don't even sound sorry about cheating.
    "I'm happily married" do you even know what that term means?
    Do you even love your wife? Why did you even get married? Are you even aware of the value of marriage? Did you just marry your wife for sex?
    Here I go lashing out.. Sorry.
    But seriously dude, your wife did nothing wrong. She's just being an overprotective mother, and that is admirable. She's willing to sacrifice her pleasure for her own child, in order not to scar him. And what do you do about it? You do even more scarring. Mindlessly going after your pleasure.
    Do you even love your wife? Because if you did you wouldn't have found cheating an easy thing to do, not would you so carelessly consider divorce.
    I know that all what I am saying is pointless. I doubt it'll move any feelings of guilt in you.
    My only advice is that you come clean to your wife about it. Don't wait till she finds out the ugly way. Just tell your wife the truth, so that SHE would be able to file for a divorce.
    You don't need to be preasant in your kid's life. Maybe your wife can find herself another man who'll accept her for who she is and be a good father figure to your son.
    As for you, you can go lead a happy sex-filled life with your lover.
    If you don't like this suggestion, any other alternation would be to truly repent for what you did and ask for forgiveness from God and your wife, and see if she's willing to give you another chance.

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    • Nothing wrong? She stopped having sex! What do you expect?
      A man has his needs... You can not just stop sex.. And expect someone to be loyal to you

    • Show All
    • Thanks

      Obviously he doesn't love her... But one day in a hotel is not enough... I has to be at least 4 days a week... Or alternate days

    • I love my wife. This female gave me the attention my wife denied me. And I thought my wife was too overprotective of my son.

Most Helpful Guy

  • oops buddy
    you've really stepped on dog shit there
    look, if that lady you slept with is somebody you really want around you should realize that the condition she is putting itself proves that she wants full commitment from you. Now you said that she'll tell your wife if you don't take her in. Well then don't take her in. Own up, she'll thrash you. she'll cry. she'll do drugs. and your son will see it all. but you have to get down to her feet, you have to talk to her and you will have to let her hit you. but if you really love her, then I'm hoping you'll be sentimental enough for her to see. I don't know what to say any more than this, if she does agree to stay, well then that's good, but if she doesn't then I really can't say more. I've spoken for your son here, for his wellbeing. just be honest, that's the least you could do. Also, you could ask that new lover of yours, that if she loves you enough, she should let you live in peace and that she wouldn't tell your wife. ask her that, because if she really loved you, she'd understand. and please don't go around shooting anybody or yourself.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Sorry to say but you're in it now. You should have been more careful who you put your dick into. Don't get me wrong I'm not saying you shouldn't have done it, after all you do need sexual release. Your first mistake was choosing someone from work. Have you ever heard that expression "You don't eat where you shit."? Well you shouldn't fuck where you work. Perhaps a classy Whore would have been a better choice? 90% of my clients are married men. A Whore would have also been cheaper than what a divorce is going to cost you in the long run. You're going to be paying alimony and 15 years worth of child support.

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  • Troll better next time, bro

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    • I agree. And to the girl that said the son "won't be hurt because he will be sage with his mother".

      Bulllllllshiiiiiit.

      The kids ALWAYS pay for their parents being selfish assholes.

    • @CheerGirl38139 Honestly from the way OP behaves I'm finding it difficult to believe anyone would want to sleep with him at all let alone reproduce.

  • "I'm happily married", no you are not. Happily married, but fucking another woman, because your wife won't put out. Not to mention, you talk shit about her views as a parent. You also don't care about losing her, just your child, and money during the divorce. What the fuck does happily mean to you?

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    • I just thought she was too overprotective. Pokémon is safe for kids

    • So you still think it's okay to talk about her to your side piece? You can be stupid all you want, but you're also making your wife look incredibly stupid. There is such a lack of disrespect coming from you.

  • oh wow.. that seriously messed up and i don't think what you described above can be seen as "happily married" >:(
    i hope your wife finds out and end things here..

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  • You got yourself into this mess. I hope your wife finds out. You're shady asf and deserve no sympathy, only pity for how sad you are to cheat on your wife. Despicable... Disgraceful.

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  • WOW you both are fucked up people.

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  • If you have to cheat, you're not happily married. Stop lying.

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    • Ok. I messed up. But, what will happen to me?

    • Hopefully you end up divorced and poor.

  • i hope she take all your money and you don't see your kids again

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  • What you have done is wrong. Call it what you like but you have cheated on your wife.

    Own up to your wife and let her decide what she wants to do. You will still be able to see your son, it will be better for his parents to be divorced than in an unhappy marriage and you will be happier being with this woman you seem to prefer.

    Time to fess up.

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    • Actually if he doesn't tell his wife nothing will happen and the problem will be solved without hurting anyone !!
      And he shouldn't cheat again

  • Do what you got to do but MAKE sure you stay in your sons life. Don't let her take that away from you. And tell your wife: no one is born racist. Racism is taught.

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What Guys Said 11

  • Difficult -- you don't want to leave your son with just that mother. You should look up what generally happens to boys who grow up without a father figure.

    Unless you think you can somehow fix the flat-lined absence of intimacy in your relationship with your wife, I think probably the best bet is to bite the bullet and go for the divorce and try to stay in your son's life (even keeping a close physical proximity).

    But really try to be as mature as you can about the divorce and focus on the son's welfare. Try to avoid turning it into world war 3.

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  • Honestly that's fucked up of her to just stop satisfying sexual at all to the point you had to cheat on her to satisfy your needs.
    However I don't think that's going to be a winning argument in court. The real question is what do you really want? Do you want to stay with your wife? Because if not just get a divorce. I wouldn't say shit about cheating I would just serve her the papers and get on with it. No point to admit to cheating if your leaving anyway that's just going to cost you extra money.

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  • It sucks to be you. Well, you cheated, so ta-daaa! Enjoy the consequences homie! 😎

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  • You got yourself in that situation. It was stupid. But what's worse than being stupid is being stupid and naive. Of course she would blackmail you. Why didn't you see that coming?

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  • Scientologist wife 8/10

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  • Lmaoooo try having ur dick not run you next time idiot, u have kids

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  • by running away to a country that does not do extraditions to your country.

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  • You're not happily married.

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  • get a better wife

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  • I am just going to sit here and enjoy the shitstorm that will be your life in the upcoming future.
    Karma is great, isn't it?

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  • I don't know but you're in a fine mess

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