My girlfriend is going to marry another guy, what can I do?

First of all, SHE IS NOT CHEATING.

I am a White guy dating an Indian girl. We have both dated Indian and non-Indian people in the past. But, we decided that we should get married. My family, and my friends (Indian and non-Indian) are supportive of it. Her friends are supportive, but her family is very angry now. They are trying to set her up with a traditional man from India. She is not opposed to dating Indian men (some of her exes are Indian), but feels that she would be incompatible with him. But, her parents object to her dating me and even started to force her to move back in with them (we live separately but spend a lot of time together after work). Marrying him would mean losing me, her career, and a lot of free time after work.

What can I do? I would talk to them myself, but she told me her father has a pistol, and I am scared.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • With having Married a Muslim Man at one time when I went to Egypt, his own family was fine with it. He didn't want any Muslim girl, and even if they didn't like It... he stuck to his own guns and it was his Way or the Highway. I am a Christian, by the way, and didn't have to change my Religion, nor would I ever. I stood my ground right from the start.
    Your girl has to make a Decision that is Something that she must Understand is going to, one way or another, Change her whole Life of Strife, at the moment. She cannot have it both ways.
    She has to either choose You as her spouse, Hopefully Having her Strict Cultured family accept you one day, or give you up and Forever allow her family to Control her like a Puppet and Maybe seeing her Miserable every day with some other guy they Picked for her.
    I see she has a lot to lose here, dear, but the Question is: How much does she love them and her Culture and Religion? How much does she Love You and all of the Above?
    Might I suggest you put a Bug in her ear and tell her, if she Stands for this on their own end, she will always be Stooping to every other thing they Scoop up for her and Throw her way and she will never be her own Boss... If so, it will Eternally be her Loss.
    There isn't much you can say to the other straw Bosses but you can make her see some Common sense on your own End, my Friend. And from where I am sitting, I am Seeing that if you Dangle the Darling carrot over the horsie's nose, sometime he will bite, which I think eventually her family would if it meant that perhaps they might not see their little filly again.
    Good luck. xx

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Most Helpful Guy

  • This seems to be clear case of forced marriage. Well if she is being threatened or forced into marrying someone she doesn't want to then you can help her by taking the help of the law. However by your post it doesn't seem like she is objecting to her parents wish, so in that case there is nothing much you can do.

    If she chooses you over them then no matter what she will find ways to be with you.

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What Girls Said 5

  • That is truly one of the all time greatest topic titles. Congrats.

    But onto your story, it just goes to show you how truly pathetic how some ancient cultures still prevail today, its like they refuse to evolve and progress with time. It's like all the years on this planet as humans and there are still cultures out there that do inexplicable stupid shit that will drive their families apart. I mean seriously, WTF?

    The only thing you can do is get her the fuck away from her parents so you can both be happy with each other. Of course its gonna be tough convincing her to leave her family, but they seem to care more about their stupid outdated ancient customs than the happiness of their daughter...

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    • I definitely agree with you. Even my Indian male friends who married White/East Asian/non-Indian women had to cut off their families completely.

  • You don't do anything. This is an issue between her and her family. And she ultimately has to choose between their wishes and your mutual desire to marry.

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  • I don't mean to sound racist but that's kind of what puts be off of dating other races because of religion and their beliefs. All those arranged marriages, are ridiculous. Parents forcing them to marry men or women that they have no feelings for. If she rebels and you both run away together, her family will more than likely disown her. Its a tricky one, she's faced with an ultimatum you or her family. Unless you can both get together and discuss the matter. Maybe they'll let her have her own choice.

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  • Break it off. Dating a married woman could be tough.

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  • sorry you can't win here

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What Guys Said 2

  • We have a tradition in Turkey, which is like if both sides love and want eachother, but families do not want them to get marry, guy kidnaps the girl at night they both decided and they leave from the city without making someone get know about it :D Maybe you can do that huh? Just be Brave dude are u going to watch girl u like sleeping and having kids from a fag?

    Be a warrior not a worrier ;)

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  • That's just sad.
    Forced marriage is shite._.
    She will have to make a decision.

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