Do you think it's wrong to take your husband's last name in marriage?

My fiance and I are getting married in November and I was planning on taking his last name. However, a few of my friends have commented on it and said that it's so "old fashioned" and I overheard one of my friends call it "gross". Do you think it's wrong to take your husband's last name in marriage?

  • No, it's not wrong -- I will take my husband's last name too
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  • No, it's not wrong -- I might take my husband's last name too
    19% (10)11% (3)16% (13)Vote
  • No, it's not wrong -- but I won't take my husband's last name
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  • Yes, it's wrong -- I won't take my husband's last name
    2% (1)19% (5)8% (6)Vote
  • Yes, it's wrong -- but I might take my husband's last name
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And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • No. I will take his last name too

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What Guys Said 17

  • No it's not wrong that's how it's supposed to be I mean it's your choice but that is how it is supposed to be.

    Also anyone who say's it's gross to take your future husbands last name during the sacred union known as marriage is not fit to be giving out advice.

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  • You normally want the family to have one "family name". It is customary here to take the man's last name. If you are a professional and need for people to continue being able to find you, then you might keep your own last name, and maybe the guy would take that, too. But normally the woman takes the man's last name. Your friends are a bit messed up trying to be "modern".

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  • Well, it's a little inappropriate to take your husband's last name when he has a first name, it's also possible your husband won't appreciate that. However if your husband doesn't mind or won't have a problem with them then you can go ahead with that.

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    • 3mo

      I don't think you've understood the question.

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    • 3mo

      I thought so, but I wasn't sure.

    • 3mo

      @Nice_Guy_Last

      No, you are right I did misunderstand the question. Thanks for the explanation anyway.

  • Jesus fucking christ in heaven, tell your friends to go fuck themselves. You're getting married NOT them. If you want to do the old fashioned thing DO IT... I don't know why tradition to some people is so frowned upon. That strong independent woman shit is getting played out... Are they some type of feminists or something?

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  • You need to find some friends who aren't bimbos. How is taking your husbands last name "gross"?

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  • You should have a choice in that matter.

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  • How is it wrong? Been happening for years.

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  • If I knew that the woman I was to wed was not going to take my last name then I wouldn't propose to her or go through with a old fashioned wedding ceremony or marriage, I definitely wouldn't buy her an expensive engagement ring.

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  • i dont think its wrong

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  • A woman takes everything else; you might as well take his name, too.

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  • its simple if a woman agrees to marry you she should also agree to take your last name and recognize you as the man of the house, no not saying the husband gets to be an abusive fk, but its how things work.

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  • Personally I would be disappointed if my future wife wouldn't take my name.

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  • lol it's a name, i personally could care less what happens...

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  • Gotta love radical feminists. How exactly is it gross? It's your choice, don't take it, hyphen it or take it. Taking it is traditional and solidifies the union in my opinion

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    • 3mo

      I must say if his last name is Roach, Butts or another very ugly one, I might not be want to take it. If it's pretty, neutral or common last name I'll take it.

    • 3mo

      Then off course I wouldn't to be called Mrs Bighead for a last name.

    • 3mo

      @MelbaB Understand, but that's not the example you gave for the reason someone called it gross

  • The fact that this is even being asked is proof that they have you pawned.

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  • My mom hyphenated it, so that she could keep hers but have my dads added on. Sure it's a lot to write but hey, that's what she wanted

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  • What is "wrong" about it?
    By getting married you become direct family members, it only makes sense you share the same surname. To me it doesn't really matter if that his or hers. I don't see how either choice is "wrong".

    When I married, I wanted my wife's surname, since I have cut ties with my father and his side of the family, but she is old fashioned and insisted she get mine.

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What Girls Said 24

  • I had Married a Muslim Man out in Egypt and when we had tied the Knot out there, I was Surprised that I was Not... Taking his Last name. It's Not permitted, and I was Very Disappointed.
    I have Known friends who didn't 'Take your husband's last name,' but I found it so Liberal Like. It was like the girl wants to be her own Straw Boss.
    Whatever you and your own Honey decide is Best from the Rest, as long as No one is Putting Bread on your own Table, go Ahead and put this to Bed.
    Good luck and Congrats. xx

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    • 3mo

      Your first mistake as a woman was marrying a muslim man. I can already tell this marriage isn't going to end well, or maybe it already did.

    • 3mo

      @kholland65 lol It would have worked out better if I had stayed and resided with him instead of comingback to the States... Other than that, good Muslim man and family for sure. xx

  • No it is not. Stop listening to your friends. Do whatever makes you and your future husband happy. To take on his family name means that you two became one family, not only legally, but spiritually, morally, and in the social eyes of the people. If you didn't a lot of people will question as to why, and what was the real purpose of marrying him if you wasn't going to show that your part of the family. You may have to go through a few legal avenues and papers to even allow that. Money may even be included as well as tax. I'm not saying it as a fact, I'm just pointing all of this out. So unless this is something that you really REALLY want, I suggest you look this up on how such procedures is done.

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  • It yours and your fiancee's choice. "its gross" what does that even mean. As for it being old fashioned marraiage and weddings are about as old fashioned and traditional as you can get, if your not going to be traditional why bother with marriage. I could understand if you were a high flying professional or wanted to keep your stage name. Be aware though that many guys might see not taking his last name as an insult and a sign of your lack of commitment, even the most liberal non-conformist guy might think that he's ok with it but it might knaw at him especially if he bought an expensive engagement ring and proposed to show his commitment to you. Its your choice and you shouldn't be influenced by peer pressure or friends especially if they are unmarried.

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  • There is nothing wrong about taking it or not. I took my husbands because I felt when you marry you are becoming one. My only complaint? My mail all comes in Spanish now 😜

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  • No, I don't. They're right that it's old fashioned but meh, do what you like. I don't care enough about my last name to have any real desire to stick to it (unless I don't like my partner's name or want to hyphenate)

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  • It's not wrong and I may take my husband's last name. He has talked about changing his to mine instead though so who knows.

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  • It isn't wrong, it's entirely up to you and your husband really.

    Personally I wouldn't want to lose my name, it's my name... I don't need a new one. I might double up and have both but they don't really sound great together, but generally it isn't something I'd feel comfortable doing. I'm not leaving my family to join his, we aren't living in the 18th century.

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  • Hmm.. well if I love the guy.. and I'm marrying him... I think I would take his last name.. it's fine.. 😊

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  • I am not going to take my husband's last name, I want to shorten my last name and take it as my pseudonym.
    My last name sounds good to me and I don't want to change it.
    Plus he can take my last name, why should I do this? Hmm
    It is not common thing in Georgia.

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  • If he wouldn't be willing to take mine why should I take his? A lot of guys think it's weird or unmanly/shameful to take their woman's last name. But not this guy

    www.usmagazine.com/.../zoe-and-marco-saldana-201586
    He's very proud of it too and I really admire him for it.
    Anyways, I don't think its weird and I might actually end up taking my hubby's last name anyway.

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  • It's not wrong to take his last name and it's certainly not gross. Your friends sound like a bunch of feminazis. Don't listen to them and do whatever you want with your last name.

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  • No, it's not wrong. And I will take his last name as well, when I get married. Why? Because having the same last name makes me feel that we are more connected, as a family. When we have kids, they will have his last name as well. If I wouldn't take my husbands last name, I would be the only one in our family that has a different name. Somehow that thought makes me feel uncomfortable.

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  • Its cultural. In Belgium a girl will keep her last name, but in France for example, a girl often takes her husbands name. In other countries sometimes both. So there is no rule. You decide for yourself.

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  • it not wrong and your "friend" is being mean

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  • I don't think it's wrong. I just don't want to give up my name. I fully support people making that choice for themselves.

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  • Why would you think taking your husband's last name wrong?

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  • What? Of course that's not wrong. I'll take my husbands name but I'll only substitute one of my last names with it, the rest Im keeping.

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  • It's just european culture, in my culture women don't take their husband's name at all.

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  • No it's not wrong, it's tradition. I would take my husband's name but I'm not sure if I would drop my own. I love my last name and would like to have both.

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  • I shall be taking my fiance's last name (surname) on the 10th September, just next month. :)
    Oh and love and very best wishes for your wedding in November. <3 xxx

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  • I find it rude not to take your husbands last name. That's how it's supposed to be. It's ridiculous not to take his name in my opinion.

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  • Not really. It's your choice

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  • No it's not wrong at all. I will take my husbands last name too.

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  • No it isn't I will take my husband's surname in the future.

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