My boyfriend sister is getting married and I dont want to go. How do you approach him on that?

So my boyfriends sister is getting married and the wedding is literally in like 7 days. Over the weekend i was supposed to attend the bridal shower but made an excuse not to go and kinda feel weird about it. His sister and her fiance are always quiet when i'm around and I dont truly feel wanted. Every time the wedding is brought up, I tend to just walk away from the conversation because i just don't feel apart of it. I've made the attempt to try and connect and get along but it seems that the tension becomes higher over nothing. My boyfriend tells me that in order to commit to our relationship that i need to be there but i just don't truly feel the need to be apart of something that i'm not really apart of. What do i do? Please help


0|0
3|7

Most Helpful Guy

  • I think you need to make more of an effort and find something in common with your boyfriend's family. If you think about it long term you will be spending important moments with them as you do things like holidays with your boyfriend. As far as the wedding, things that are important to your boyfriend should be important to you and vice versa.

    0|1
    0|0

Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm sorry but your boyfriend doesn't sound like he understands you or want to understand you. If you feel unwanted then you need to talk to him about your issues with it. That is not fair for him to act like that. How is that a way to "commit to our relationship..."? What do you need to prove? That is the issue I'm looking at. And prove it to who? His family? Because it sounds like its more than just him making that statement. However even though you aren't apart of the family, you did made a choice to date him. Talk about this to him first, before you do anything. And if he gets upset that you don't, maybe you need to start reevaluating if you really want to be involved with somebody who acts and behaves that way.

    If this was your family member, then thats different. Unless they don't want you there, then you don't have to be there. That's another thing to find out. Ask him how do they really feel about you and for him to be honest. Do they even want you there at the wedding, yes or no? You need to ask them and him personally. Because if you can't even do that, you may need to break up with him. Because forcing you to be there when you don't feel welcomed is not right. Sounds like the family doesn't really like you and he's trying to force the like on them by trying to make you look more committed to the family, not just him. Thats what it sounds like.

    0|0
    0|1

What Guys Said 6

  • You heard the man. You want to connect in the relationship he is asking you to do him a favor and be there for his family, yet you are refusing to do so. Sounds like you value yourself more than your boyfriend, which tells me the relationship is already doomed to failure

    0|0
    0|0
  • Go to the wedding.

    0|2
    0|0
  • "Sorry but I'm not going to the wedding and if that's a deal breaker for you then goodbye"

    0|0
    0|0
  • Your boyfriend sounds like a manipulative jerk.
    I don't understand why you wouldn't want to be part of the bridal shower if you were asked? But maybe that's a guy thing because we wouldn't feel compelled to ask a guy to be our groomsman if we didn't truly want it.

    Honestly not enough information given to form enough of an opinion. You might be making mountains out of mole hills, you might not be.

    0|0
    0|0
  • if you can't even go to your bfs sister's wedding then why are you dating him? regardless of how much you like her , i dont like my relaitves but i have to go to all weddings its a duty that you have fulfill no way around it.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Just tell you dont wanna go

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 2

  • Suck it up and go to the wedding. Would it keep you to get dolled up, be supportive, and enjoy a free meal for one night?

    You seem really cold, standoffish, and kind of like a vibe killer about the whole situation which can turn the family off of you for good. Did something previously happen to create tension?

    0|1
    0|0
  • Just go to keep the peace. At the end of the day it'd not about you

    0|1
    0|0
Loading...