GAG is this a good reason to file for a divorce?

My husband is always busy, working all the time and even in weekends. I'm always alone with my son and i tried to talk to him many times but he's not giving me his attention. We don't spend time together alone, we don't have sex ( last time was before 2 weeks) and every time he promise us to go out i end up with my son alone because he couldn't come for a reason. i met a guy and he gave us his attention most of the time, he is interested in my son and me. When my husband promised to spend a night with me i ended up waiting for him all night and he didn't call to tell me that he's not coming. I feel like he's pushing me towards this guy and I'm so scared of my feelings for him.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • So you want to divorce your husband because he's busting his ass and breaking his back to provide for food, shelter and a home for your and your son? yeah ok, that's cold.

    Do the right thing cut off contact with your male "friend" and sit your husband down and tell him what you just told us, minus the part about you possibly cheating on him with another man.

    you need to COMMUNICATE with you husband otherwise this issue your having is not going to get fixed. Talk with him and tell him what you told us, again leave out the part about the other man.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's not a good reason to divorce. Instead of pitying yourself why don't you talk to him or see a marriage counselor/therapist about it? And even when you get attention from this other guy you should ignore it or stop it in its tracks once you've realized feelings are there and avoid him.

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    • 3mo

      I tried to talk to him many times but i stopped now

    • 3mo

      Then speak to a marriage counselor/therapist.

What Guys Said 8

  • No, that's not a good reason. What does your husband do for work?

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    • 3mo

      He is a lawyer

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    • 3mo

      I tried and he said we will talk about it when i'm free but we didn't so i stopped bothering him by that.

    • 3mo

      Did you approach him about it?

  • And this folks is why I refuse to marry...

    Guy busts his balls, commits to a girl, has kids with her.

    Girl complains that guy busts his balls to support her. Starts talking to other men. They will divorce and she will take the kids and try to suck alimony off him. $30000 down the drain.

    And I get called a "pussy" for refusing to marry =P

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    • 3mo

      It's ok if you don't want to marry someone one day

  • Let me guess... you got married before you were 25 years old?

    Marriages at young ages have a HUGE divorce rate.

    Get it over with now or it will cost more later.

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  • So your husband's out hustling to provide for you and your son and you are talking to another man? You need to talk to him ike a normal person and not some attention whore. what kid of example are you setting for your kid doing that?

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    • 3mo

      That guy is a friend but i started to have feelings for him and it's not like we go out with him behind my husband's back or something.

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    • 3mo

      I have feelings but it doesn't mean i will cheat.

    • 3mo

      Talk to your husband. Best of luck

  • Nope not a good reason. Let me guess you like ambitious men?

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    • 3mo

      Why not? And yes i do

    • 3mo

      Well because this is the life you chose, you wanted an ambitious man and got one, so work to make your relationship work, and yes this will mean you have to make some sacrifices. Did you think your ambitious husband wouldn't be constantly working his ass off, that he wouldn't be physically and mentally exhausted from work constantly, that work wouldn't be constantly demanding his attention, that his huge amount of hours dedicated to success wouldn't take a toll on your relationship?

      You also have a child and NO ONE but his real father can be his father, period. Tearing your family apart will destroy your husbands life and your child's life. You will never be more safe and more secure than you are married and living with the biological father of your children. You child will never thrive like it will living with it's biological father.

      It's going to be really hard but that is what marriage is. You are an adult and your choices have consequences.

  • You are being unfair. If you really want your husband to spend more time with you and your son, you should both work part time, not expect him to feel like doing stuff together when he finishes work and you got to just sit there all day.

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    • 3mo

      Am i selfish?

    • 3mo

      He'll be tired from working all week. This is why even when a couple stays married, it is almost the same as the kids growing up without a father. He is mostly just a check/financial support to the family, but he doesn't get to be there and enjoy the family that he supports.

      If both people wors, but not full time, so you have the exact same total income as you have now, you would all be happier and everyone would end up feeling like they have a loving family since there would be more time to spend together. Also, neither of you would be too tired at the end of the week if you only worked part time, so you'll have plenty of energy to do stuff together.
      Make a family game night/day where you play board games together. You each get to pick one and you play each of them. You get to have fun and talk at the same time. Do that every week together as a family. It doesn't even cost much and you will all become closer. Your son will feel like he has a more loving and close family too. I wish

  • so, when a guy showed up, your husband , who is losing his life to provide money for you and your son , became evil
    go ahead for divorce take half of his money , and start bitching about how life is unfair

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    • 3mo

      It's not about this guy, he is a friend and I'm not thinking about cheating with him or something (even when i have feelings). I'm just sick of being alone with my son most of the time and tired of his promises that he can't keep because he has to finish working on something first before we go out as a family.

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    • 3mo

      My feminine side is ruining my life? Is this what you think of me?

    • 3mo

      no
      its not about what i think
      i am just trying to come up with something that make him feel something serious here
      and men know feminine shit should be taken seriously when its about to irresponsibly ruin serious stuff like family

  • Sit down and discuss your feelings with your husband. If he chooses work over you, then you have your solution. Whatever you do, don't file first. Try counseling if he will agree to it.

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What Girls Said 7

  • I think you need to actually sit down and talk to your husband about how you are feeling but don't mention the guy... And don't forget that you promised to be there for your husband during the tough times, so just have a close talk to him about what you have been feeling, and if he becomes like so what.. Then you
    Should start considering divorce otherwise why would you ruin something you built for so long for a guy that you Just started to talk to?

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  • Well your clearly unhappy. Tried talking to him about it? Or marriage counselling? If that doesn't work you at least need to end with your husband before being with the new guy

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    • 3mo

      It's not that i want to be with the other guy, I just feel like this is too much for me and i don't know what to do because every time i try to talk to my husband he say "we will talk when I'm free" I'm still waiting for him to be free.

    • 3mo

      Well tell him you either need to walk away or have that talk

  • Sorry, it is not a good reason to divorce. My uncle works a lot, and he has 2 baby girls. He wife is always there to support him. You should do the same. He is making money to feed you guys. Give him a chance, and talk to him when he isn't in a rush, or he is going to work.

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  • "I met a guy"

    Ugh seriously?
    So you go and get that attention from another man?
    -_-

    He is not pushing you towards the guy. It's you who is going to him.

    Anyway, as for your marriage, I can't give advice without hearing both side of the stories.
    Maybe your husband is genuinely busy with his work and is trying his best to give more time to you.

    You on the other hand need to stop going after other guys.

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  • You want to leave your husband because he has a job? No, that's not a good reason. He could be a little more considerate, but 2 weeks without sex is pretty typical in a marriage. You need to realize that marriage and dating aren't remotely the same. They're work. You don't just give up because they changed. And you talking to another guy is very disrespectful and rude to your husband.

    You're being very unfair and, quite honestly, extremely immature.

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  • You can file for divorce if you want to but I do believe that you should be very upfront with your husband and let him know how you are feeling and let him know how his actions and how he is being distant is affecting you. If he is uninterested in fixing his behaviour or not even trying to spend more time with you and your son than maybe divorce will have to be the answer. Like you shouldn't feel all alone in a marriage. Good luck to you and your son for a good futur

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  • Let me get this. Your husband is out busting his ass to provide for you and your son while you are getting close to another man? Damn bitch that's cold.

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    • 3mo

      I didn't say i want to divorce to be with the other guy, i only said that i have feelings and i'm scared of my feelings. so this has nothing to do with him

    • 3mo

      Still tho ur being unreasonable. If I want to spend more time with ur husband get off ur ass and get a job urself so he doesn't have to work so hard

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