How can he go from, "I'm afraid of commitment" to "let's get married"?

When I met my boyfriend 3 years ago neither of us was looking for anything serious and here we are now. A few months ago I said I wanted to get married and buy a house together, he kind of freaked out about the commitment. A few more months went by and I was trying to force myself to accept our life. He's great, perfect, treats me like I'm the most important thing to him, respectful, supportive, makes me laugh... Anyway I was trying to be happy with the way things were and he popped the question in the most romantic way. Of course I said yes but I'm a woman and I'm having doubts.

I don't want to get married because he wants to make me happy. I want him to marry me because he wants to share the rest of our lives together.

Did he really change his mind or is he forcing himself into something he doesn't want?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • he may have had time to think about it, or he may be trying to make you happy. Why dont you just ask him about it? one moment he wasn't sure and the next he wants to marry you? a few months is a long time to think about things. just ask him before you get into a deeper hole and let him know you aren't forcing him because he may feel thats the case

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    • 1mo

      I think that's very good advice. Just because by saying this, you are showing your love for him in another way yet. It's obvious you love each other so I congratulate you. Best of luck.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Girl... really? he's a grown up man, his decisions are only his own!, you might have influenciated in the way he used to think, maybe he is still letting the idea settle, however, he made up his mind and he proposed. You can now ask him openly how he feels, and that you don't want to push things... he then must explain how he feels, and if he loves you and wants to make you happy, then I think it´s ok to accept marriage that way... your happiness is his happiness and viceversa... just talk about it with him, in the end you're both getting married, and if you can't even talk about these simple things now, what would be like in a future when you need to really speak up something that's bothering you?
    Best wishes, hope you find the right thing to do :))

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What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Girls Said 4

  • maybe yes he changed his mind

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  • talk to hiim about it! only he could answer :)

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  • Sometimes men need to think about it

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  • Maybe he did a lot of thinking and realized there no one else he want to spend the rest of his life with but you

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