Break up because of boyfriend's ex?

I want to break up with my boyfriend because I really don't like his ex

I think she was a whore, and she slept with way too many people

My boyfriend liked her so I am not like her... I don't think he understands that I can't be with him because I keep thinking why am I with a dude who likes whores when I am not one? He's treating me just like his ex too.

I don't like that his ex and him lived together for three years, and his ex's mother and sister all lived with them and they all three (the ex, her mom and her sister) were whores. they slept with numerous men outside of marriage just for the fun of it... for the sex... I don't like that... plus I find him sick for wanting so much sex that he would be with her just for the sex, I'm trying to save myself for marriage so I don't think our values are the same... when I want to break up with my boyfriend he says that he will go and kill himself and he doesn't know how to live without me... what can I say to make him understand? he just does not understand!


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What Guys Said 0

No guys shared opinions.

What Girls Said 1

  • First of all - stand by your fellow woman. If we go around labeling one another with such condescending terms... how can we expect men not to label us the same?

    I think its great that you want to wait until marriage, however that isn't for everyone. If people are sexually active, that is their business, and it doesn't make someone a "whore". That's truly a strong word that I don't think younger generations fully comprehend the full meaning behind.

    Moving on, that is in your boyfriends past, and clearly you are his present. You will encounter plenty of relationships later on in life where he may have been divorced, previously engaged, or perhaps he had some sexual rendevous in his younger days. Bottom line is at the end of the day, he is with you.

    If you truly cared for him, you would accept him past and all, and honestly his past would not matter.

    The threatening of suicide is a completely separate issue that reveals your boyfriend isn't emotionally mature either and clearly this relationship is not a healthy one. No one should ever threaten to kill themselves over the loss of a significant other.

    Anyhow, while I feel this relationship is truly a train wreck waiting to happen... if you are truly determined to make this work, you need to stop judging. No one likes to be judged nor do we have the right to judge others. Its been my experience that mroe often than not behind judgement lyes jealousy. Could there perhaps be some underlying jealousy that you won't be his first? -- Despite saving yourself from marriage perhaps your disgust truly stems from the jealousy that another woman was intimate with your boyfriend. If that's the case, realize that their experiences cannot take from yours. But back on track, - sit him down, explain your point of view without the name calling, the judging, etc.

    Do a little soul searching, discover the point of your anger with this, then explain it to him calmly like an adult. "Hey, listen. It bothers me that you and your ex lived together and had a sexual relationship, and it even makes me a bit uncomfortable as I don't believe in premarital sex. That said, perhaps I also don't like the idea of other women touching you or experiencing you in a way I have not. I'm working on becoming comfortable with it, however its hard..I just need you to bare with me on this" Best O Luck. But truly, do some soul searching as I suspect this may be jealousy talking rather than values.

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    • Thank you. I think most of what you said was understandable.

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